Husband says he is unhappy in marriage?

Question

My husband and I have been married over seven years. We have been arguing for the past week and over the weekend he tells me he has been unhappy in our marriage for the past two years. Why is he just saying this now--after two years? And why would he stay in a relationship for so long when he is so unhappy? He is NOT cheating--I KNOW this is not the case. But how do I move forward? Do I stay in the relationship and a--hope he gets happy with it or b--decides he is still unhappy after two more years and leaves then? I am happy in this marriage (my second-his first) and love him with all of my heart. We don't have any children and I am torn with what to do here? Do I tell him to leave? Stay and work on it? How can I know he's truly happy if it has taken him two years to voice it now?

Answer 1

If he is unhappy then I think he needs to tell you why, especially since you seem to be happy and thought everything was okay. Perhaps counseling can help you all. I can say that if he is unhappy because he is tired of being tied down, well then that's a whole nother story. Also, how are you so sure that he's not cheating? Him saying he's not cheating is not enough proof. He may not have had sex with anybody, but maybe he's cheating emotionally or he has somebody that he's interested in. Usually when people say they are unhappy for no reason, or for no obvious reason, they have found someone else that they are interested in.

Answer 2

You would be surprised at how many people are unhappy in their marriages but never voice it.
What surprised me even more though is that their spouse doesn't recognize it. Do you think you didn't want to see it or were there actually no signs whatsoever?
He could have stayed because he felt that he made a commitment, or he didn't want to hurt you or he would grow out of it.
has he said he wants a divorce? Does he want to work on the relationship? You need to figure out what is causing him to be so unhappy. There is a good chance it can be fixed. However, if after trying nothing seems to improve, it's best to part ways. You obviously love and care about him. Unfortunately what may turn out to be best for him might not include being married to you.
Just don't give up quite yet. This is all very fresh. let the dust settle and then discuss where the two of you go from here.

Answer 3

My heart goes out to you because you love your husband with all your heart and now he tells you that he has been unhappy in the marriagefor the past two years do you ever commuincate with each other, whyis he staying in this marriage i really dont no why only he can answeer this for you.
being in love with someone is different than just love them
do you feel that you cant go on with out him. Perhaps you can work this out and find out what is going on in your relationship than if you cant solve the problem do what will make you both happy.
best of luck

Answer 4

He has probably been trying to make things better in your marriage for the past 2 years but just doesn't know how to even try any more.
I was unhappy in my past marriage for 4 years before I decided to say anything to my ex.
And that's because I kept thinking that I could fix it, and make things better between us.
It just never worked, after 4 years, when I decided to tell him, that's because no matter what I tried....I just wasn't happy any more.
Maybe he was trying but you weren't because you were thinking that everything was alright between you 2.
Now you BOTH need to try at the same time.
Ask him exactly what it is that he's missing in the relationship. And that's what you need to work on.
Do whatever you can to try to make things work.

Good luck :)

Answer 5

What were the reasons he said he's been unhappy for two years? Don't you need to start there? If he says he's just fallen out of love with you or that he made a mistake marrying you, then your answer is pretty clear; however, if he said it was due to something you guys can work on, then can't you work on it?

Answer 6

Go to a marriage counselor, and you should express your feelings and he should say what he is not getting out of this relationship. ANd you could say something about if you disagree or feel the same way. Then you two should work it together based on what you both found out, dont divorce, stay a family. peace out. if your both unhappy you shouldn't stay together.

Answer 7

Running away from marriage is not the answer. It takes work. Yes, get to the bottom of why he is unhappy and don't point fingers. Address yourself with "I". And when you do find out what he is unhappy about, don't hold him to it or he just won't confess next time. Work through it. n

Answer 8

If you haven`t already. You need to sit down and talk about it. Try not to make it a yelling match, that goes nowhere and just makes things worse.
If you have the money you could try marriage counseling sometimes it works.
I know it`s difficult but sometimes things just don`t work out and you need to move on.
I just went through the same thing your going through.

Answer 9

Counseling!!!!!

It sounds like the two of you need a good counselor and then you can decide if this relationship means enough to both of you to keep it going. A one way relationship works for no one.

Answer 10

"I'm not happy" is about as vague as you can possibly be, and it tells us nothing. Suffice it to say, he's lost interest in you and the marriage. Since this is your second marriage, maybe you do something to kill their interest? Either that or you pick the wrong ones. Whichever is the case, fix that.