How do I follow my heart instead of trying to be what everyone else wants me to be?

Question

I have trouble with saying no and expressing how i really feel. I'm a 20yr old girl in college and it seems to me everything I do is for someone else, including my chosen course.

I'm really afraid of mucking up if i follow my heart and that's the major thing that stops me from telling anyone what i really want and just allow my folks to take charge.

But the problem is I know where my happiness lies, but I don't want to create tension in the family or muck up my life.

Answer 1

This is your life you are talking about. You ought to make your own choices, lead the life you really want irrelevant of the gains or losses you will experience.
To follow your heart means you listen to your inner self abide by your feelings, act by your intuition.
Remember this: at the end of the day it’s you and the consequences of your choices you have to deal with and leading the life others choose for you is simply a choice.

Answer 2

Can you differentiate between you heart and mind.
Heart feelings are simple but the mind puts conditions.
If you are in confusion then you mind is working not heart.
But a heart with out mind is waste and a mind with out heart is utter waste.
So know the balance and live happily and joyfully.
If your aim is high and you believe in that then no one can stop you.
You are the maker of your destiny.
Society puts tremendous pressure by dictating the terms.
Social situations and parents will teach you how to become this and that according to their wish.
If you want be something extraordinary you don't want to be tailor made by them then you have to make a decision and stick to it and fight and die for it.
That's the only way or you can compromise like what other folks are saying.
Happiness lies inside us not somewhere.
Just change the way you look at things.
Simple flower can give us happiness why run for something else.
If we are centered inside nothing can shake us.
Every thing we see, every person we talk, every step we take, every word we speak, every note we listen, every game we play is all happiness and nothing else.
Life is just a drama play it like a king.
Even if we play the role of a begger in the drama inside we know we are not beggers.
In the same way in this big drama of world we are all the kings no one is a begger the role may differ from a emperor to a begger. From a saint to a sinner but we all are the king of the kings.
GOD is seated in our hearts.
The Emperor is in our hearts.
Who else you can ask to. From whom you have to expect.
From where you will seek happiness.
Where is the hope when you are everything.
What is there to Hope for when you have everything.
Life is giving not taking.
Thus alone we live in constant bliss.
You are infinite nothing stops you.
But all this is practicable only in rightful manner and unattachment.

God Bless you.

Answer 3

The only way you can "muck up" your life would be if you went against everything you feel is right, just to please somebody else. The people that really love you and matter, would want you to do what's best for you, and would expect you to want the same for them. Anyone else is insignificant. You're the only one that has to deal with yourself and at the end of the day you know how you truly feel. Stay on the right path, you sound motivated. It's okay to get confused sometimes, but as long as you stay doing the right thing, you'll find your way back on track and you'll be just fine.

Answer 4

Answer... stop listening to them and start doing what you want to do.

This is of coarse easier said than done. I understand, I was in a similar position a few years ago.You don't want to let your family down by not taking their advice. Your family needs to learn that you are an individual as well as being part of the family. They need to understand that you are 20 and need to do what you feel is right. Even if it turns out to be a mistake. You learn best from your mistakes. Your family needs to be understanding and supportive.

You have to tell them that you love them and respect them but at the same time are unhappy and need some space to make your own decisions. If they refuse to support you, move out and distance yourself from them a bit. Keep in contact with them and let them know how you are going, but keep your distance. I did this. I left uni and moved out with my partner. My family were unhappy and unsupported about this at first, but after a while they came to realize that I could survive without them. I have a much better relationship with them now than I did while I was living with them. We respect each other and support each other.

As for your friends, be honest with them. If they suddenly don't like you, then they weren't very good friends. I'm sure you will find new friends doing whatever it is you want to do. Personally I think family is the best support network you can have.

Answer 5

OK - you need to explain how you feel to everybody.

If you're talking to your friends and they're real friends, they'll understand.

If you're talking to your family, then they should allow you to do what you want to do (within reason, of course). If, by following your heart, you're talking about (for instance) dropping out and getting pregnant then your family may be pushing you to do what you are because it's the best thing for you in the long run.

If you're just talking about doing a different college course then go for it. Otherwise you'll spend the rest of your life wondering "What If"

Answer 6

If people don't understand you for who you are, they probably don't care for you as much as they'd like you to think they do. Of course they might be thinking that you aren't considering where your choices will take you. If that's the situation your best response might be to have a good idea of what the possibilities are from the choices that you want to make. Take your life to the next level and find out what opportunities you will have from the things you want and love.

Answer 7

I see from your words that you wanna make things of yourself but are afraid to do them ,because you dont want to disappoint your parents or your friends! I can understand you! I have passed the same things! But dont worry! I know thats it is not always right to follow what your heart says but sometimes it is! You will judge it and i am sure you can! Dont let your parents anymore to control your life! You are an adult! Your parents always want you to be happy and sometimes they are overprotected! You have to discuss with them and tell them what you feel and they will understand! You will make choices for yourself anymore and you wont take good grades because you want to satisfy your parents! Be confident! Thats the most important! And you will see that things will go better! Good luck and most of all trust yourself and base on what you can do! Good luck!

Answer 8

"Live life on ur own terms, after all its ur own life" this is what I was taught!!!
Do, watever makes u happy. u better know where ur happiness lies, so express, tell everyone how u want to proceed with what!
To make ur self happy, Follow ur heart and dont ever think that u r doing it wrong. Keep the spirits high!!! good luck

Answer 9

You have to come to a place within yourself that you are happy with who you are. You and you alone have to decide what you want out of life and go for it. If you try to make others happy and not yourself you will always be miserable. Your family should be happy if you are happy and if they aren't then that is not on you. You are at a point when you need to sit back for a while and repriortize your life not stop it completely just sit back go within yourself and find out what you want out of life. To thine ownself be true.

Answer 10

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