the other family had one child. the husband, an alcoholic used to abuse the wife (domestic violence). the husband did not either love or support the wife and the child. the wife and the had to quit- to overseas. the husband had to use all the ways to humilliate the wife- he created the story that the wife has eloped with another man. was it wrong to quit from domestic violence?
5 years has passed, the husband does not bother to support his child though the child lives with the mum but the husband insist that the wife should go back and sort the issues.
in this situation, do you think the wife should go back to her husband?
will the husband change his unreasonable behaviour?
will the husband start taking his responsibilities in caring, loving and supporting his family- wife and the child?
please comment.
2007-09-03 21:39:34 · 19 answers · asked by cecilia m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some people (men) just don't believe in doing the right thing.. Unfortunately, some men are just wrong when it comes to supporting their families
2007-09-03 21:42:59 · answer #1 · answered by BigWashSr 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why should the husband be expected to support a child that he never sees because the mother removed the child to another country? I also don't understand the "had to quit to overseas" part of this story, there is plenty of protection for women suffering from or threatened by abusive partners so that is just not acceptable from my point of view.
The issues between the husband and the wife are nothing to do with the child. Why is the child being denied the right to a relationship with it's father? It seems to me that the child is being used to inflict emotional abuse on the father. That is simply wrong and is doing more damage to the child than you can ever imagine.
I would suggest that you both get a grip on yourselves and settle your differences so that your child can enjoy the best possible relationship with it's father and it's mother. I can understand if you hate your ex because of the abuse he subjected you to but there is no excuse for removing the child to another country. This effectively prevents them from having any kind of relationship and is punishing the child for the fathers mistakes. That is just evil in my opinion.
Would like to hear the father's side of all this though, he has responsibilities too. He sounds like a true jerk, but the mother doesn't sound like a reasonable person either. God help the child is all I can say.
2007-09-04 03:51:29 · answer #2 · answered by Shakespeare 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The husband is a jackass. He will not change until it is to late. The mother need 2 forget about gooing back 2 him becuz it will be the same old thing when she gets back. The alcohol unfortunately is more important to the husband than his family and responsabilities. Wife stay put until the hubby decides to make a solid effort to change.
2007-09-03 21:45:33 · answer #3 · answered by jayman31 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in my opinion, i'm adversarial to it, and not in basic terms for the clarification that i'm in an older era. If a female is the only skill of help for the kin, the guy is regarded upon by society as an entire, and the courts in specific, as little greater suitable than an afterthought contained in the relationship. whether he's a homemaking husband, he's the butt of a joke: ie. Mr. mom. while the guy is the service, he helps his kin; if the female is the salary earner, he's seen as no longer something greater suitable than opposition for components that must be disbursed to the youngsters. Then comes custody and visitation if the marriage ends. I even have infrequently heard of girls human beings being ordered to pay baby help, and in no way heard of it being enforced. in contrast to a female, if he has no job or financial components, he loses the youngsters. era. The spouse takes the youngsters, and gets a financial judgment contained in this form of baby help that he won't be able to pay, often ensuing in his having to take 2 or greater get admission to point jobs just to pay the maintenance of the youngsters and shop a roof over HIS head. and she or he will use that to maintain her ex from seeing the youngsters, because of the fact he's in no way going to be residing house to be with the youngsters besides. All in all, being a homemaker husband is a undesirable deal.
2016-10-03 23:01:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If wife wants to asses the situation seriously then the husband must have been enrolled to a clinic for his alcoholism and must have had a proper job and he must have been treated of other personality disorders.
Sorting the issues is not wife's responsibility right now since she is taking care of her children and living her own life.
The wife needs a solid proof here like seeing his doctor (if he has any) or his boss (if he has any).
Because it seems that this situation is far beyond believing personal oaths.
Good luck
2007-09-03 21:57:40 · answer #5 · answered by Ardelia 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The possibility of him changing is slim! But let me ask you something, why are you asking instead of her? Or are you "her."? If you are trying to get advice for someone else to make a decision whether she should stay or leave, you are getting out of your boundaries, as that is her responsibility to make that decision. You can give advice, but stay out of the decision. But if it is you that you are talking about, no he probably won't change, it is called "growing up!" If the husband does not bother to support his kid in five years, why would he start if she went back to him? Isn't he giving her a clear message, that he doesn't want her any more? A man that wants a woman takes care of her to the best of his ability; and if that isn't happening, then.......but the bottom line, it is what YOU want in marriage and what you are willing to deal with. If you can't deal with him the way he is, then leave. If you think you can, then stay.
2007-09-03 21:57:48 · answer #6 · answered by Ikeg 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the husband felt the need to vilify the wife in order to justify his actions, she is fighting a loosing battle because the husband is comfortable with his life and doesn't want the responsibility. after this much time he is set in his ways and she should move on and stop hoping for a miracle here.
2007-09-03 22:24:33 · answer #7 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
your question sound generallastic, dont say husbands, should be the husband of your friend or who ever, if a man decides to reingulish his position the option for the woman is to decide to take care of herself and her family or to go court to seek for legal means to get him support the family. However, why is it that woman always want to get something out of nothing , the man is alcholic so how do you want him to be responsible, the woman should please forget about this man and look for livelihood to take care of herself and her child, the man needs help so why do you bother to get a help from a mad man who really help.
2007-09-03 21:49:37 · answer #8 · answered by zainab gangaali 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When you vote for a certain gouvernment and then they suck, who's to blame? I think that no matter how far women have come with regards to equality etc. they still don't have a clue when it comes to choosing a mate. How rich or good looking he is has nothing to do with it. You have to start looking into a man's soul to find a good man who will bust his *** to provide for his family and always love his wife and children. Get a clue, ladies.
2007-09-03 21:49:15 · answer #9 · answered by nvr10pts 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I think your onto a hiding to nowhere here. Insecure men who bully their ladyfolk tend only want to get it back on because they cant make anything else of their lives. Move on would be my advice to someone in the situation you describe. Get a nicer man and start enjoying their life.
2007-09-03 21:49:58 · answer #10 · answered by mlud12000 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋