Does anyone have a problem where your girlfriend doesn't trust you even though she has no reason not to? Here is my situation - I love her and we have been together for over two years, we live together. She has no job, ZERO friends. She spends her days at home, walking our dog, tanning and occasionally cleaning. Then when I come home she smothers me and gives me NO time to myself. I pay all of our bills, her bills and even gave her a credit card that I pay. If that weren't bad enough, she has the nerve to track EVERYthing I do. She tries to get on my computer when I walk away from it. She reads my email, she looks up my sceen names and email addresses online to track what I am doing. She joins the same sites I go on so she can monitor everything I do!
Any advice on how I can get rid of her would be greatly appreciated. I care about her so I have no problem taking care of her for a while as she makes arrangements so please be considerate. Thanks!
2007-09-03 13:07:24 · 11 answers · asked by Z X 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thanks for all the responses, I do appreciate them. As one of you have picked up - she tracks this site as well; I am just waiting for her to read this post so she knows that I am aware she is still being psycho. Thanks again!
2007-09-03 13:24:07 · update #1
Dawg, im sure she gonna read this too then. So she will definatly find out and maybe leave you with out any problems.
Now, if that doesn't work - turn it off, unplug it, close it, yell "PULL!" When that thing is 20ft+ in the air, take a shot gun and blow it away just like skeet shooting. That ought to take care of it!
2007-09-04 13:27:29 · answer #1 · answered by tony b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless the girl has a medical problem she needs to shape up. There is no evidence that this will happen on its own, and you are not obligated to support her if you do not want to.
If you decide to break up with her, you certainly should do it as gently as possible-but you also cannot predict how she will react. Therefore, the day before you make the announcement you need to get her out of your financial life. She should not have a working credit card of yours, nor should she have access to passwords for your financial data, nor any way to draw money from any accounts. Changing some of your other passwords are optional, some are necessary. You also need to make sure there is no confusion about whose stuff is what, although you might as well give her the benefit of the doubt on minor issues.
It might also be nice to arrange for a friend to put her up for a while, if she chooses, but the best thing here is a clean break and it's better if she is living comfortably somewhere else as soon as possible.
2007-09-03 20:23:48 · answer #2 · answered by Steve 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you really do love her and your problem is that she is a bit unsecure but you still want to be with her if she could stop monitering your every move then my advice is this talk to her and explain your situation tell her you would live for her to find things that she enjoys doing and give her the oppurinuty to check in on you from time to time let her slowly come to grips I am telling you a girl who thinks a guy cheats makes the crazy they feel violated and betrayed and if you are cheating on her then tell her cause even though it may hurt her now if she finds out on her own it will devistate her.
And just because you support her doesn't mean that it makes up for lack of emotional support which can make a girl crazy to. Show her some love and let her know how special she is to you cause i will garuntee that when she is gone you'll wish like heck that she was still there if you truely love her try to fix your problems
2007-09-03 20:32:26 · answer #3 · answered by redheadedstepchild_3 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There is nothing you can do because the problem isn't yours; it's your girlfriend's, who by the way has a VERY low self-esteem and is a control freak, due to her lack of self-confidence.
If you haven't already done so, I urge you to have a serious talk with your girl about how her suspicions make you feel. It is unrealistic to expect you to spend the rest of your life wearing blinders and pretending having her controling your life is fine with you.
If she's smart, she'll talk to a counselor about this, because suspicion on an innocent boyfriend can destroy a relationship as surely as infidelity can. If she denies everything or gets mad about you telling her how you feel and doesn't look like putting an end to this crazyness, tell her to move out and to give you back her credit card.
And do not feel guilty, please. She should go to a therapist because she definitely has some issues (not having friends, not leaving the house, watching your every move...).
Good luck and take care! :)
2007-09-03 20:24:45 · answer #4 · answered by svankmajer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send her back to her parents and get on with your life. If that is not possible, set her up in a modest apartment, pay the first two months, then let her know she'll be on her own.
Now about you...get a grip. You are not her keeper. You cannot "take care of her." She needs to be able to do that for herself. Find a woman who is fully grown and can offer an equal partnership in a relationship...not someone you have to "take care of." Make sure this woman is what you are looking for in a life partner and that you both have similar views on love, life, money, and family.
Remember to change your locks after this one moves out.
2007-09-03 20:25:34 · answer #5 · answered by carolewkelly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, yeah I agree that you should do this!
Um.....
1. You could start going to church and tell her it's against your beliefs to be shacking up.
2. You could just tell her nicely to her face that it's not working out and you care for her, but you can't love someone who doesn't trust you
3. Find another place for her to live. Make a few advance payments on the rent, utilities ect, long enough for her to get herself together.
4. Call her parents/siblings ahead of time so they can come pick her up. That way she can leave without a big scene (hopefully).
5. Take her on a little weekend vacation and tell her. Make sure she knows you love her, but you're not "in" love with her.
God bless!
2007-09-03 20:15:14 · answer #6 · answered by me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've just got to say goodbye. Work it out where you sell the place or rent somewhere else; she just has to be given notice, is all. Expect the lawyer to call, though, if you've been paying for everything, a good one might feel there's an oral promise implied (and a palimony case).
2007-09-03 20:27:24 · answer #7 · answered by Goethe's Ghostwriter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By the sounds of things, your girlfriend is not happy in your relationship as well. Be straight with her. Tell her how you feel. She might also want out of the relationship but hasn't the fight in her to do so.
You will be doing her a favour, helping her to get out there and have a life.
2007-09-03 20:19:50 · answer #8 · answered by blondy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you know what. its sad to say the least but the best thing for you you have done what you could have an now shes just not fair to you and its not right. if you have had it with her tell her she has one week to move you and she are done there is no nice way to say good bye but yu have to be strong and tell her as its not easy to do this tell her you two are not compantible and that she does not trust and that goes hand in hand with love not jealousy so tell her ot move on.
2007-09-03 20:13:12 · answer #9 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Isn't she tracking what you do on the computer?
Can't she see this?
I think you just did it ;-)
Good luck with your situation....you need someone who you can have a mature relationship with....not a child.
2007-09-03 20:15:35 · answer #10 · answered by jezyka 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋