She's only 16 (no idea how she gets them because you have to be 19 to buy them here and no one else in my family smokes. She just found out she's 1 month pregnant and she doesn't even want to quit!! I'm in college studying to be a pediatrician but I dorm and only come home on weekends. She said she started smoking when she was 13 because her boyfriend smoked and always gave them to her. Now she's pregnant and she's a chain smoker, I mean 2-3 packs a day. I've told her thousands of times what happens. I have some books about what happens to the baby when you smoke and I showed her but she didn't even care!! I love babies and I want to make her stop!! My parents are trying everything to make her stop too but it isn't working so well. What do I do?
2007-09-03 09:31:17 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Abortion is wrong and I am not going to let her get an abortion! It's like murdering!!
2007-09-03 09:37:28 · update #1
That's disgusting for anyone (this coming from a smoker) let alone someone who is pregnant! Honestly, your parents need to step it up a bit and keep a closer eye on her. She's still a kid-their house, their rules. She isn't allowed to go anywhere but doctor's appointments and school. They check her bags for smokes,etc. Sounds harsh but she definitely needs some guidance-and fast!
2007-09-03 09:35:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm less worried about her smoking than I am that she's 16 and pregnant.
Quitting smoking is not like changing your underwear. The decision is hard to make, and the promise is almost impossible to keep. It may have nothing to do with her baby's health at all--she may love the baby to pieces--and still not have the self will, discipline, etc. to quit smoking.
My father is a perfect example. He's 72 years old, buried his 62 yo wife two years ago. His wife died of lung cancer. On her deathbed he promised he'd quit. He can't. He would if he could, just to honor her. But he can't. The nicotine addiction is a powerful thing.
At this point in time, there are a lot of helpful items, meds, etc. that are no longer available to her because they may harm the baby. Ask her to chat with her dr. about it. Maybe he can help her.
I am the baby of a smoker. I suffered no ill effects of her smoking and pots of coffee during pregnancy, or second hand smoke during childhood. I was not undersized 8+lbs.
Don't assume that your sister doesn't care. Maybe she does, maybe she doesn't. But you cannot MAKE her do anything at all. So leave off the nagging, offer your assistance if she needs you, and stop.
TX Mom
not an expert
P.S. I'm glad she has a sister and parents who care so very much about her.
2007-09-03 09:48:35 · answer #2 · answered by TX Mom 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
As you and your parents are discovering, nobody but the smoker herself can get the smoker to stop smoking. No amount of pressure or rewards will change her behavior until she wants to change it.
Of course, her OB should know how much she's smoking, and deliver a no-holds-barred discussion of what this does to the fetus in development.
Sounds like your sister's setting out on a real hard path awfully early in life. My best wishes for her getting it together and making something good of her life.
2007-09-03 09:38:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
The more you try to scare her into quitting, the more she'll smoke! I know this doesn't make any sense, especially to a non-smoker, but the more stress you cause by scaring her, the more she smokes! It's an evil circle. There's really nothing you can do to force her to quit! If nothing else, try to get her to cut down...
Get her the book The easy way to stop smoking by Allan Carr - it worked for my husband. I read it and it gives you a unique insight into the smoker's psyche... that cigarette really does become a crutch. Read it to see what I mean... then give it to your sister.
2007-09-03 09:53:15 · answer #4 · answered by elainevdb 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, if she believes it, and she sent it to the 15 people she was supposed to send it to, then I guess she already did what she was supposed to do. Relax. Now she won't have someone by her bed to kill her. Now the 15 people she sent it to will have to worry coz I'm sure since it was a chain letter they will all get the same threat. What are friends for? Share in the fun.Hey, spread the joy!
2016-03-17 22:59:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, as an ex-smoker, nothing you do is going to work if she doesn't want to quit. A buddy is in 3rd stage COPD and won't (can't) quit. He's going to die and he just won't.
Second, what's this you "won't let her" get an abortion stuff? Now you're overstepping. Advise her, inveigle her, inform her - but that "won't let her" grates on me. The prospect of an abortion of a baby born to a 16 y.o. irresponsible high school student is a viable one - and one that's between her, the father (if he's acknowledged), and her creator - certainly not you.
2007-09-03 09:49:50 · answer #6 · answered by Bacse 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just let her be, it's her life. With smoking, getting pregnant i'm pretty sure she already doesn't care.
2007-09-03 09:49:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have your sister go to www.whyquit.com.
2007-09-03 09:46:49 · answer #8 · answered by Rosey55 D 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, unless SHE wants to quit, there is NTOHING you can say.
2007-09-03 09:38:13 · answer #9 · answered by Betsy 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋