why do i think that i like girls more than guys and it's harder for me to be in love with a guy??

Question

am i a lesbian? or am i denying that im one? im 18 already and it is still hard for me to find a guy to like but it's easy for me to fall for a girl. im confused.....

Answer 1

I can't give you a yes/no answer, but I hope I can point out some interpretations so you can try and understand your own situation a little better.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself:
- do you make friends more easily, or get along better with females?
- do you tend to spend more time with female friends?
- do you find it difficult to understand males (when compared to females)?

It's possible that you simply find it easier to be friends with females, and some people would find that equals bisexuality/lesbianism, but for others, it's just that: they are better friends with females.
I've found that groups of kids raised in more open-minded environments are more likely to be "lesbian" although that might be due to them accepting the deeper friendships as sexual love while the same feelings would be rejected by those raised in more restricted environments.
I doubt that sexuality is a yes/no/both thing. There are people who fall between the basic categories, and you might be one of them.
The Kinsey Scale allows for different levels & combinations of sexuality:
0 - Totally heterosexual
1 - Mostly hetero, a tiny bit homosexual
2 - Mostly hetero, somewhat homo
3 - Equally hetero & homo
4 - Mostly homo, somewhat hetero
5 - Mostly homo, a tiny bit hetero
6 - Totally homo
X - Asexual

Friendship can run very, very deep--it is quite possible to confuse platonic friendship with something sexual (in fact, I believe the two share a gray area). To some degree your sexuality is a choice: you might not be able to choose that you like guys/girls, but you can choose to how to interpret that. You could consider yourself straight, with very deep friendships with the same gender, or you could interpret that as being bisexual, or even homosexual.

Connecting very deeply with someone may, or may not be love. Maybe your suspicions of lesbianism are right, but maybe you just happen to make much better friends with females. Attraction is not always sexual, and even physical attraction isn't necessarily sexual--there's a whole lot of overlap and different ways to interpret feelings.

(& Don't panic, you're still young: I'd much rather see a 18 year old a bit confused about sexuality than a pregnant 14 year old, and I imagine it's better to be former rather than the latter, too.)

Answer 2

That is a really good question! I think guys fall harder once they do fall. You're right about girls falling quicker and easier...I'm one of them! Guys have a hard time expressing their feelings so I really think it's them!

Answer 3

Maybe you are a lesbian, or bisexual and just tend to meet more females you like than males...relax and just go with your feelings on this. No need to try to force a label on yourself or fit into some 'box'. You like whomever you like...we don't have control over who we are attracted to.

Answer 4

It's ok. Maybe you have to wait a while to find love with a guy. Now. What do you mean by fall for a girl? If you "like" a girl, then i dont know. i guess its not your fault.......i think......

Answer 5

maybe your a lesbian, nothing wrong with that... i support it. or you might havent found the right guy yet. and when you will then you'll feel whats right. Good Luck

Answer 6

you R a lesbian
and you trying too hard to not be a lesbian but you instincts are to be a lesbian

Answer 7

You might be....or maybe you have just not met the right guy yet. Give it time your still young.