I cut myself because I have anger issues!I'm feeling stressed out again.What should I do?

Question

I started cutting since I was 13 to get rid of my feelings.I was never allowed to express my feelings and my family life was messed up.I'm not sure what to do now.I'm boiling with anger and frustration on the inside that I'm not allowed to express.I have to "keep the peace".Its driving me over the edge!Help me please!

I don't want to see a councelour.I hate councelours and doctors.

Answer 1

If you feel the urge to injure yourself, below is a list of suggestions that might help you to overcome that urge. Please be advised that not all of these suggestions will be helpful to everyone. What is helpful to one person, may not be helpful to someone else. These suggestions have been provided by individuals who self injured and what they found helpful to them. If you feel that a certain suggestion may in fact cause you to want to self injure even more, do NOT use that suggestion. Find ones that are helpful for you. Again, these are only suggestions and may not be helpful to everyone.

deep breathing
relaxation techniques
call a friend, your therapist or a crisis line
try not be be alone (visit a friend, go shopping, etc.)
take a hot bath
listen to music
go for a walk
write in a journal
wear an elastic around wrist and snap it when you have the urge to harm yourself
some people find it helpful to draw red lines on themselves with washable markers instead of cutting themselves
hold ice cubes in your hands - the cold causes pain in your hands, but it is not dangerous or harmful (some people find it relieves the urge to harm themselves for that moment)
punching a bed or a pillow (when nothing but a physical outlet for your anger and frustration will work).
scratch draw a picture on a thick piece of wood or use a screw driver and stab at the piece of wood. (can be another physical way to release your emotions without harming yourself.)
avoid temptation (i.e. avoiding the area in CVS where the razor blades are kept, etc.)
try to find your own creative ways as outlets for emotions.
learn to confront others/making your own feelings known instead of keeping them inside
go outside and scream and yell
take up a sport (a form of exercise can help you release tension, etc.)
work with paint, clay, play-doo, etc. (the person who suggested this mentioned that they would make a big sculpture and do whatever they wanted to it. They said it was helpful to calm the urge to self-injure, plus it gave them some idea of what might be underlying the pain.
draw a picture of what or who is making you angry
instead of harming yourself, try massaging the area you want to harm with massage oils or creams, reminding yourself that you are special and you deserve to treat yourself and your body with love and respect
go to church or your place of worship
wear a pipe cleaner or something that will fit on the places that you injure. One person did this as a way to remind herself that she could call someone instead of hurting herself and that she had other ways to cope.
break the object that you use to self-injure as a way to show that you have control over it.
write a letter to the person(s) that have hurt you and express how they made you feel. Theses letters do not have to be in perfect form and you do not have to please anyone but yourself. You do not have to give these letters to the people, but it is a great way to release the feelings that you are carrying within. After you write the letters, you can decide then what to do with them. Some people find destroying the letters help (i.e. tear them up, throw them in a lake, etc.)
do some household chores (i.e. cleaning)
do some cooking
try some sewing, crossstitch, etc.
recite a poem, prayer or anything else familiar the comforts you multiple times
write down all your positive points and why you do not deserve to be hurt
write in your journal why you want to hurt yourself and if you have hurt yourself, write down what caused it to happen so in the future you can prevent it from happenings - or find out what your triggers were
Play some kind of musical instrument. Even if you don't really know how to play, picking out tunes is a way to concentrate and help get rid of the urge to harm yourself.
yoga
allow yourself to cry. Getting the tears out can make you feel better. It allows the inside to release, as opposed to self abuse. Picture your "ickies" pouring out as you cry.
Take a shower
write down a word best associated with what you are feeling (i.e. horrible, sad, lonely, angry) and continue to write it down, over and over. Sometimes when you do that, the words looks silly etc., and it puts humor or a smile in your life.
sing a song on what you are feeling. It's another way to get it outside. Shout if you are made, etc. Let the words just come to you.
Scribble on paper. Clutch the pen in your fist. It's a way to diffuse it on to paper. (Get a few sheets so they don't tear.)
Take item you are self injurying with and use it against something else. For example, if you are using a razor blade, rip it across a towel. Sometimes seeing what "can" be done to an object can make a person think twice about using it on themselves. Can also give the feeling of "doing it"...the tangible aspect.
Make a list of reasons why you are going to stop cutting. Every time you get the urge, read the list to remind yourself why you shouldn't. Also remember to put on that list that you do not deserve to hurt yourself. You are important and special and you do not deserve to be hurt.

Answer 2

I used to cut myself, and so far for the last few years have been successful. First I had to realize how much it was hurting people who love me, and how selfish I was to do this. I promised I would never do it again. I write a lot to get my anger and other feelings out, often I rip the paper with my pen, but better the paper than my skin. There is probably some underlying cause for this. Either figure it out for yourself, or go therapist shopping until you find one you do like. There may be some medications that will help you as well. For me I have a Higher Power I talk to as though h/she were my very best friend. I listen for answers in meditation. If you would like a copy of what I use for meditation e-mail me, and I will send you a copy.
May peace be with you

Answer 3

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
I cut myself because I have anger issues!I'm feeling stressed out again.What should I do?
I started cutting since I was 13 to get rid of my feelings.I was never allowed to express my feelings and my family life was messed up.I'm not sure what to do now.I'm boiling with anger and frustration on the inside that I'm not allowed to express.I have to "keep the...

Answer 4

Wow, I never cut myself but I do understand the reason most cutters do it. One of the things that occurs when you are cut is the endorphins that are released give you a slight high. Kinda the same reason an addict gets started down their path. Often it because you are having trouble dealing with emotions, depression, or your twin brother. You really need to talk to Mom first and explain things. Then perhaps she can soften the blow when Dad gets home. There are so many other ways to get that high without drugs or self mutilation. Sports, Art, Religion, relationships... Dude I am praying for you really hard right now. I am a recovered Crack addict. Clean 20 years, so I really fell your pain. I am praying for you.

Answer 5

i'm sorry to hear that you dont like to speak to psychologist's or doctor's in that field. the truth of the matter is your going to have to speak to one. there's absolutely no way that can reslove this on your own.

i know that's some psychologist can be no good but you have to keep looking for one that you like. i've been through it. so that's why i know. that's many year's ago for me. and i know that i could never have healed with out speaking to someone.

you say that you could not express your self. well with a psychologist you can spill your gutt's, get angry cry everything. you are too tightly wound up. you have to bust open in a healthy way of coarse. i think the reason you dont want to speak to a psychologist is because as you said you were not allowed when you were a child.

so taking a step to opening up to speak to someone openly and honestly can be a step in the healing process for you.

think about it good luck

oh and ps think about this. those scar's on your arm's will out live the problem. so try your best not to cut any more. even if it's a long road to finding out how to stop.

k

Answer 6

You're not the only one who does that.You have a serious anger issue, and this will not go away by itself.Try to see a specialist before you hurt yourself even more, it's dangerous.Or, if you do not have the time/money/nerves/guts to go see someone, chew gum!Yes, it sounds stupid, but when you're angry, put a gum in your mouth (a big piece) and chew it.I'm a police officer, it seems to work on some people.
Sorry for your problem, get well, be well and stay safe!

Answer 7

please.please think for a minute......
when you feel like you must cut yourself do you have a friend you can call? do you feel that you are relieved when you see blood, believing that the pain is in the blood and by cutting it ease the pain? sweetie please listen to me please......i use to have the same problems. it was the friends that i was around. i also wasn't allow to speak on my feelings so a friend told me i have to relieve my tension and anger by cutting my wrist. at first the cut was just small and after a while i begin to think that this really worked....how wrong i was....the cuts begin to get bigger and deeper. i like you through that there was no way i could go on living in a painful world.....there again i was so wrong.....i had to learn to control my anger which took some time. i also made new friends and talk to them about my trouble soul. ..one of mine friends name Leon ask me to look up and say hello to GOD..
of course i didn't but later that night i did and it seems that there was an answer...from that time on every time i felt a need to cut i ran to a place where i could talk to GOD... i was honest and open with HIM and the answer didn't come the way i throught they should but they came.....through other people....GOD show me what i could do for myself.....i keep all blades away from me and i also have a friend [Leon] that i could call anytime day or night....i also realize that with all the cutting i done that my feelings was still there....i started to study people....the more i knew about people, the less reasons i had to become upset with them......i'm here to tell ya that i have NEVER cut myself again.. i respect myself to the point that i love me......GOD has enlighted me to understand things now that i never throught i could....years has passed and i still today run into young people that i have tried to help with this same problem.......i was to late for one.....so baby you don't have to go through this alone, say hello to GOD and allow HIM to hook you up with some people that CAN be a help to ya......seek and you SHALL find......ask and it SHALL be given knock and it SHALL be open unto you........may the peace and happiness be yours.......

Answer 8

Well, if you despise counselors (and some of them are despicable; but, some aren't) you have placed yourself in prison. The door is not locked and the guards don't care if you walk out.

But, YOU have to walk out ! Self help doesn't work, in fact, the pro's are there BECAUSE self help does not work.

If my 'check engine light' comes on and I insist upon continuing to drive; I'd best not be surprised when something serious (and costly) happens. OR, I can take it to a specialist with Cadillacs and get it fixed.

Answer 9

Ya gotta love yourself dude...That's the only way to peace...
and try to help others...when you give your energy and good intentions to others, your problems will lessen. Maybe I could
come over and bite you with my huge front teeth..then I'd feel like I was helping, and you'd still get cut. But that's really no answer. Think of having something to believe in and appreciate. You don't GOT to be here, you GET to be here.
Life is good! You get one shot. Practice peace! Doesen't mean you'll get it instantly. Practice makes perfect! Peace,
brotha!

Answer 10

i know what your going through you need to find something that you enjoy doing and devot to it when you feel angered or depressed. i started painting drawing no stress just drawing whatever came into my mind i would take a sketch book pencil and eraser everywere with me i still do it helps trust me find something you like and stick to it, it will become you out let your sanctuary. cooking anything that you can concentrate on even writting. i was like you i could not stand therapists and iwas at point where i was vomiting till i vomited blood i wouldnt eat for days and cutting myself. i was like this for about 3 years until some one gave me some advice and said keep yourself busy with things that you like express yourself through it you dont have to share it with anyone just as long as you get it out of your system. if you need help or you need someone to talk to i'm around just ask, i sympathise

Answer 11

Not sure how to answer the bigger issue of how to deal long term with your anger (soz) but i heard on the radio about a social worker who advises the people she works with to squeeze ice cubes to release some of the anger rather than cutting yourself...admittedly it sounds a little unsatisfactory but then again, i dont know as i dont do it myself.