Do you accept it and live without it and be unhappy in that area? Do you cheat? Do you go gay? I have high sex drive and she doesnt anymore, she used to but now very little. She doesn't even express it with touching or kissing. It seems like I'm a roommate lately with some benefits. I still love her and everything else is great but cant take the no sex / affection. And no there is not a thought or need for a divorce
2007-09-02 21:44:39 · 16 answers · asked by Rammer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
WTF, "go gay" ! Seems like you are the one that's having issues.
2007-09-02 21:52:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
Hey Ram I am going through the same thing. R there any kids? It is a very tough situation but cheating is not going to help. I have a really high drive and my wifes is nonexistant and I feel the same way as u alot (95%) of the time. The best thing to do is talk it over with her. It is not uncommon for women to go through this stage. I am withering the storm but just recently my wife said she is gonna talk 2 her doc about the issue and see if there is anything to help her. There r all kinds of things out there to help boost her drive. Just never belittle her about it, Also try and make some time 4 the both of u, counseling helped my wife and I for a little while (it got to expensive to keep going but worked well while going), But it is rough and u r gonna have to do something about it. But cheating never is the answer especially if u guys have kids, and unhappiness is not the answer either. Work 2gether it is the only thing I can tell u. Sorry bro but know exactly where u r coming from to the T. Keep a straight head on and stay strong.
2007-09-03 04:57:24 · answer #2 · answered by jayman31 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Well the first step is you discuss it with her. Maybe there is a reason for it. Many women experience a loss of libido after haviong children. Others find it hard running a home, looking after children and maintaining a lively sex life.
If she wont discuss it with you, maybe you need some relationship counselling. It seems strange why she wuld be into sex one minute and completely off it the next.
By the way, i cant see why this would prompt anyone to become gay.. if you wanted to cheat (and i am not suggesting this is what you should do) why wouldnt you cheat with someone of the opposite sex. Why mention gay?
hmmm...
2007-09-03 04:52:46 · answer #3 · answered by Chimera's Song 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I think that happens to alot of guys. I know it has with me and many of my friends. It was hard at first but it gets easier with time. The thing is though, she needs to be there for you too at least occasionally. My wife understands the way I feel and though she feels differently, she helps me out every now and then cause she loves me. On the same note, I love and respect her and know shes not into it and try not to be pushy or needy about it. If we go a while, I just mention that something needs to happen soon or Im going to the massage parlor. (in a joking way) she usually laughs, tells me I better not and then takes care of me in the next few days. Good luck with it though, I know it sucks
2007-09-03 04:51:27 · answer #4 · answered by Rudy 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sex usually is very important to most healthy men in any kind of committed relationship. There could be lots of reasons why your wife has lost interest. Is she worn out from caring for children or has a stressful job? Is she undergoing change of life? Is she depressed? I would try and talk to her and find out what is wrong. I would encourage a visit to a doctor first, and a psychiatrist second. I admire that you still love her, but cheating is not the way to go. If she is in sync at all with you she will listen to you and your concerns.
2007-09-03 04:53:47 · answer #5 · answered by Kate J 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
In short she made you a sex object? Always objecting when it comes to sex !!! REPORT THE ABUSE !!! Talk to her and say that we should see our lawyer and talk about sex abuse.
Seriously now, its good to have a counselling. You could ask another couple close to you or maybe a church counsel to openly discuss the problem. As the man of the house, learn to express your feeling to your wife with love and understanding. Most likely, your wife will also open up.
Do you know there is a VIAGRA for women also? Maybe this could help her to be more sensous or jerk her up.
2007-09-03 05:52:49 · answer #6 · answered by One 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes the reason why women lose their sex drive is because they don't feel loved by their spouse, hence, feels that sex is purely carnal and is not an expression of love anymore.
Try to be more romantic, by sending her flowers, inviting her to dinner and making her feel special. Don't forget to bring out little surprises whenever you're in bed with her so that sex can be something enjoyable for her.
2007-09-03 04:52:04 · answer #7 · answered by Lorna 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I haven't seen anyone suggesting a medical investigation here. It's possible she may just need more estrogen or testosterone or a lady Viagra to help. I would at least talk to your doctor and ask him if there might be medical solutions. If the Dr. says yes then ask her to see him/her and discuss it. My wife's sex drive pretty well shut down after our first child but birth control pills helped it return.
2007-09-03 04:59:31 · answer #8 · answered by Robert P 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I totally went through something like that with my ex boyfriend. We eventually broke up, but not becuase of that. It made it very hard for me though and I always wondered is this how it's always gonna be for the rest of my life. I would consider getting some kind of relationship conseling. Maybe they can help you out with some way in boosting your woman's sex drive or figure out why she is this way. Hopefully you can work through it.
2007-09-03 04:51:22 · answer #9 · answered by Gina R 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
This is the grey area of marriage. Marriage is a contractual agreement between two people for specific performance. Hard to accept when you try to couple this with the "religious" aspect of what we think of marriage. If you think this is not true, go try to get a divorce, and read the paperwork. Obviously, if you try to cause her to perform she will go all ballistic. Legally, that is breach of contract. Now, what to do? If you cheat, without her written permission (if possible), you are in default. Since you are happy with the performance of the rest of the contract, the only way you can legally cause her to perform is to seek redress. Personall, I'd divorce her, cause there is more to this than meets the eye. Always is.
2007-09-03 05:18:23 · answer #10 · answered by duaneb_59 5 · 0⤊ 5⤋
maybe she has an emotional problem with you or your life that you dont know you should help her because women look at sex as a emotional relationship not just a phisical contact
2007-09-03 04:51:43 · answer #11 · answered by asal.s 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋