Should i keep the baby? Im 24 and in financial stress?

Question

Iam currently 6 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend of 3mnths have discussed it with both our families. Everyone (including him) are happy and all say that we should keep it and that they will support my decision - regardless if its to abort or to keep it - Iam worried that:
a) we both not ready for a child (I am 24 - 25 in the next 5 months- and he is 32)
b) Iam just getting out from Major debt and only getting on our feet with that
c) its only been a 3 month relationship and isnt it too early for something like this to happen?
Iam really confused on what to do? I really cant come to terms with the abortion, but i feel that the financial and then my thoughts on not being ready on a mature level could pose a problem?
what should i do????

Thanks to all that answered!
Although its a tough decision to make, its completely different knowing that you have a life that you are solely responsible for and that you shouldn’t stress about! Even though its completely unplanned for and you had taken all the precautions and only to find out that you have fallen pregnant with a “little miracle” baby who was so destined to be here!
Once again thanks to all for your input…

Answer 1

It's a baby and a gift from god. It's not your choice to kill it. I cannot believe anyone would even consider this! It makes me so freekin mad that you would come on here and ask that question. You should have thought about it before you had your fun. Money or no money, that baby is already alive, just because you can't see it yet, doesn't mean it isn't. If you can't or won't keep it, then give it to someone who will love it, the way it deserves to be loved. There are many women out there that would love to raise that baby.

Answer 2

Firstly, you are a really mature person and have some really good reasons for feeling the way you do. I admire that you took all the precautions and were trying to set yourselves up first but this little miracle popped up.

I also admire that you have openly asked a question about a subject that is quite sensitive to some people.

You will know in your heart, what is the right thing to do.

This is what happened to me, my partner and I had been together for 5 months, I'd told my partner that I couldn't get pregnant, so we didn't use contraception. (I'd been told I couldn't conceive). We spent tons of money travelling and buying expensive stuff when all of a sudden, I'd realised that I was pregnant. Although we were both excited, I was living on one island and he was on another, we both had no money and both had our own debts to worry about.

In the end, we now have a beautiful 3 year old son and another on the way, it has been really tough financially, and we were just getting back on our feet when we found out we were pregnant again. Because I'd always wanted kids, but was told I would never have any, I would never think of abortion, but if you feel that you are not ready to have this child, then it is totally up to you honey! Like I said, I have much admiration for you airing your thoughts and wish you and your partner all the best. Good luck with everything.

Answer 3

If you have even the slightest doubt about abortion, then my opinion is don't do it. You already say that you can't come to terms with abortion, so you have strong feelings against it. If you go against those feelings (or instincts) you will regret it for the rest of your life.

Trust me, we all have doubts when we find out we're pregnant - even if we wanted to become pregnant. I had severe doubts too! I still do, and in about a week, my baby will be here, I still don't know if I'm ready - but I'm sure I'll find out soon enough and adapt quickly enough when they hand my baby.

The thing is, there are no certainties in life. Even if I am financially strong enough now, something may happen tomorrow which will not make me so... but when it comes to children, we always find a way - not just because we have to, but because we WANT to... the love we have for our children is overwhelming. You have the support of your families... that is really such a gift you can rely on them - a lot of ppl don't have that and still manage.

You have the support of the father, three months isn't a long time, but even if the relationship doesn't work out, he's there and wants to be a father to the child... I'm sure he'll support you in every way possible.

What you should do, in the end, is up to you though, no one can make that decision on your behalf. Just remember you are luckier than most in your position - you have the love and support of the father, his family and your family.

Good luck, with whatever you decide to do.

Answer 4

I'm glad that you have the gut feeling that abortion would not be good for anyone.

let your family know that you need there emotional support and you are not sure yet how you want to handle this.

give yourself sometime. at 6 weeks you have not yet truly become connected to this baby most woman feel a deep sense of attachment when they see the first ultrasound and feel the first kick around 14-17 weeks

give yourself a time frame to be free from decision and try to get a better idea of how this boyfriend will be as a father. try to focus on your feelings for for each other right now instead of worry.

when you reach 6 months the re evaluate your feelings if you think you cannot handle it still financially and emotionally
first consider asking a family member to adopt your child before strangers.
I did this myself my uncle and aunt adopted my little girl she is 11 now and we get to talk every day on messenger , she knows where she comes from and I have the piece of mind knowing everything that happens in her life good or bad.

there are many times i have regretted my decision as i can never get her back. It was an official adoption and they could not have children so they would never consider it.
Give yourself plenty of time if you give your child away it will be the hardest thing you ever do.

Answer 5

First of all.... CONGRATULATIONS Mommy!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know you are very confused right now but just the fact that both your families is in 7th Heaven about this little one means that you will have all the support you need with your little bundle of joy. And the fact that your boyfriend is happy about the baby means that he wants this baby and that he will be there for you. Don't stress. Your families will lend a helping hand, whether it is to help with the baby, moral support or financial support, you will see!

And believe me... because you dont feel pregnant you also dont feel emotionally ready for the baby but wait until you are 6 months or 7 months pregnant. You will have a whole new perspective on this pregnancy.

Believe me!!!! I am now 6 months pregnant and at the beginning of my pregnancy my perspective was a whole lot different than it is now. It is as if the motherly instincs kicked in. It is a wonderful feeling. I was scared at first but now I cannot wait for this baby to arrive. It is such a blessing.

KEEP YOUR BABY... IT IS A GIFT FROM GOD!!! AND A TRUE BLESSING!!!

Answer 6

Im 24 and my daughter's first birthday is this month. We were financially secure when we got married, but a month later it all changed. Having a baby does mean more $$$ out of your pocket, but for us it was worth it.
Even if I was on my own, I would have had my daughter.
Finances are always tight with babies, thats life.
Maturity changes with time.
if you are unsure of an abortion now, dont do it. If you have to think about it, then either go for adoption or keep your baby. Abortion is something that can cause major regrets down the line and possible health problems for you.
You have your family to help, that will be a blessing. The day my daughter was born I quit living for me, and began living for her. Coming home to see her smile, even after the longest day is worth every penny I didnt get to save or spend, and every bit of growing up I have done.

Answer 7

Have you considered adoption? If you do not want to abort your only other two choices are keeping the baby and adoption. No one is ever ready for a child. I will say that for me it is a wonderful experience even though we do struggle, our daughter has the things she needs. From experience adoption is a wonderful thing. My brother was adopted and my brother says its the one right thing his biological parents ever did. If you don't want adoption then the only other option for this child is keeping him/her. The final option is one that if you choose you must come to terms with or you may feel guilt over and wonder what that boy/girl would look like. Being pregnant can be a hard thing in itself. I hope that you make the right decision. What that decision is, I can't tell you. I don't like abortion myself but you will come to your own decision and what you think is right. Good luck.

Answer 8

Well no-one can tell you what to do, YOU and your partner have to come to the decision. I can understand why you are not sure about things, since you and your partner have only been together briefly.

What I will say is that you should NOT assume that abortion is a walk in the park (I am not assuming that you DO think this). Many women have aborted their child and spent many years deeply depressed over their decision. Some women later find that their fertility has been compromised and they can no longer reproduce, and they rue the day that they had the abortion.

Answer 9

well if you weren't ready to have a baby you should of thought about having protection and how come you slept with a man that you only new for 3 months isn't that a little early (unless you knew him previously) but i think you should keep the baby just think this could be the last child you ever had ad plus you have all the support in the world i would say have the baby and take care of this child this child was not asked to be made it was your choice to have UN protected sex so take responsibility for your actions

sorry to sound mean but its not fair that there are people out their ttc and people get on her and say they don't know what to do well they should of thought about protection so they don't end up in this mess but good luck and keep the baby

Answer 10

If you are not ready for a child just yet; find someone willing to care for your child and give the little baby in side of you a chance at life. Your parents gave you the gift of life and there are lots of couples out there who would love the opportunity to take your baby off your hands. Please don't abort the child. Let your child be someone's chosen one. You will be glad you did.

Answer 11

keep the baby!! it is a lot of responsibilities, but if you are still having doubts about abortion then it is best that you keep the baby. Most people i know who had an abortion is having a harder time recuperating than the one who decided to keep the baby eventhough a baby is a lot of responsibilities. It's good that you are just out of debts, i'm sure that you keep being debt free while having a baby.