My husband always gets bummed out, even to the point where he doesn't want to have sex, and he says it's because his penis is too small. But it isn't. We can have normal intercourse and both of us climax just from that intercourse. The only thing he can't climax from is felatio (sp?) . This really bothers me because I love him and I want him to be happy with his body. I tell him that he is not small and that he makes me happy and satisfied. But it still bothers him, and I can totally see why.
Now, I started looking around on the internet for this condition that I heard about on a plastic surgery show called hidden penis. The TV show of course couldn't show the surgery without being blurred, but I found websites with pictures, and it is EXACTLY what my husband has! How can I encourage him to get this diagnosed and possibly corrected without him thinking that it is for my benefit? I am happy with him the way that he is now, but I know he isn't, and I very much want him to be. HELP!!!
2007-09-02 21:19:06 · 18 answers · asked by Mindy, the hair fixer-upper 3 in Health ➔ Men's Health
I agree with adnan..you sound so kind and loving
Do not tell him you researched this until you say would you like me to research if there if something to help as I am worried about how you feel about it but I totally am happy on my end sexually and with you.
If he says yes look around wait a few days before telling him what you know and revisit all the sits in case he checks the history on the computer that you just looked after you said you would if he agrees. Or you might try that approach about seeing something on TV
If he does not tell you to research it or show interest if you say about the TV show, drop it and do not bring it up again continue to support and reassure him when he feels upset about it and realize we all have things about ourselves we do not like and our loved ones cannot always fix that..
Maybe try herbdoc.com male formula which will enhance both your sex lives (the make formula).
Finally,.I think you being satisfied will go a long way in helping him so be sure he knows what you like and do not hold back with expressing pleasure as this makes men feel good about themselves.
forget bout giving to him that way if it doesn't work./.use what works and spice things up a little with some variety to get your minds on things working well and away from deficits...focus on the good and make the good better.
If you genuinely feel you are able to brooch the subject without hurting his ego or making him feel you are not satisfied, follow your heart as it seems to me this is what you want to do. You seem to be a tactful, kind person who may be able to pull this off. If he is a decent guy, if you mess up, hopefully, he can forgive you..just be extra sure to give him strokes..(no pun intended) to reassure him it is ok with you either way in the events his feelings get hurt accidentally. It is a delicate subject for some men. What should matter to him is your both have pleasure...lots of men are small and overcompensate buy being excellent in other ways sexually and becoming better lovers so this may be a blessing for him in disguise as so many men are not considerate of their partners or skilled in other sexual ways. try not to worry too much. Notice the masculine things about him (whether brains, brawn, or skill) and admire him for them as men need this from women in their lives as much as we need to feel loved and cherished as females.
2007-09-02 22:19:15 · answer #1 · answered by janie 7 · 8⤊ 0⤋
"I tell him that he is not small ........."
First off, if your husbands penis IS small, then telling him it isn't - REALLY isn't helping the situation. If you had a tiny thumb and everyone kept telling you it was just fine - would you believe it - or just wonder why close friends were lying to you when you could PLAINLY see - that you had a small thumb.
It is the same with his penis. It may be that you are perfectly happy with it - fab - but teling him that it isn't small - when he KNOWS it is, truly isn't helpful. It is "humouring him" at best - and lying at worst - even if for all the right reasons.
First stage (certainly if you are going to try and get him to look at surgery) is to be honest and acknowledge what he is saying - you cannot tell him "it is NOT small - by the way, this is a website all about hidden penises".
If the main problem is not orgasming through fellatio, you might need to step back a bit - this may have nothing at all to do with his penis being small.
MANY men find it difficult to achieve orgasm through oral stimulation alone - MOST guys (unless premature ejaculators) tend to find they need manual stimulation (hand and mouth together) to make it work well.
You see, unless there are other problems with his penis, then size should have nothing to do with sensitivity at all. what probably DOES have a huge bearing on this is his self confidence.
Perhaps the simplest way forward might be to wait until HE brings the subject of his penis up again - and then you can comment on something like :-
"Well you know I am perfectly happy with things as they are - and you always make me orgasm. However if **YOU** are unhappy about it, there was a feature on daytime TV that I caught the end of - apparently some guys who are not happy about the size of their penis, can get daignosis and treatment. Would it make you happy to consider that? Either way I will support you - I am perfectly happy as I am - but I need your happiness to be addressed too"
Or something based along those lines perhaps?
If he DOES want to consider it, then either go searching together OR at least wait a day or two before saying "Ok, here are 17 links for you to look at and Doctor Steven on 345746 is ready to see you tomorrow afternoon! :)
Good luck
Mark
2007-09-02 21:39:48 · answer #2 · answered by Mark T 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My guess is that facebook is not the only place where he's hiding things. Maybe he's cheating, maybe not, but the bottom line is your marriage is being hurt by his keeping secrets. You need to find a way to open up the communication between you and you're probably going to need help from an experienced counselor. Spouses are supposed to share their lives with each other, not hide things away. You need to know what he is hiding and why he feels the need to do so. These are not white lies . A white lie is something you say to avoid hurt feelings - like telling you the new outfit you're wearing looks great when he really doesn't think so. These lies and secrets are hurting you - and thus hurting your marriage.
2016-03-17 22:42:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
. I have this issue. Unless you live with it you don't know how it feels. It really messes with your mind. Self esteem is not there you can only fake it for so long. I have lived with for many years. Tried different things. That 10 pound thing doesn't work. I lost 60 pounds and my penis remained "hidden". And you women can be so harsh....especially if one is honest and upfront and they tell you it's ok and make you feel like it's ok and when the "time" comes you get laughed at...I trust no one outside of my family. People say forget about those people who don't accept you for being you......That person probably never has been in the situation of not being accepted by anyone
2015-04-22 16:42:22 · answer #4 · answered by George 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like you are happy. You say you are, but you are on a Men's Health Board asking for help in discussing your man's small penis size with him.
If he wants help, let him ask for it. Don't bring it up or you will CRUSH any dignity he has left for the rest of his life.
What if he was in a women's health area asking how to talk you into breast implants? How would that make you feel? Like he is unhappy with your breasts, which would cause you stress and anxiety.
Leave it alone. If he needs help, he'll ask.
2007-09-03 04:42:10 · answer #5 · answered by Barney Blake 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My Penis Size Tripled : http://LongPenis.uzaev.com/?GJiw
2016-06-26 07:14:49 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell him that you've seen a show and looked the suject up about surgical repair. odds are that he'll do whatever it takes to enlarge himself. just needs your support and understanding.
2007-09-03 05:57:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Next time he mentions it, tell him like this "I am happy with what you have, but if it really bugs you then I will look some stuff up and let you know" (dont tell him you already looked stuff up) but the next day tell him about this thing you found, and see if he is interested... now where do I find this show?
2007-09-02 21:27:42 · answer #8 · answered by yafathomiejt 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you are satisfied, and you let him know it, well what is his problem?
May I dare ask this - maybe he is worried that he wont satisfy someone else????? I cant imagine this has anything to do with it, but why is he so obsessed with the size. I mean if it aint broke why fix it?
It does beg me to bring it up though (pardon the pun), but if it isn't bent or buggered or bung, and you are getting your kicks and he knows it..... well WHY is he so worried?????
2007-09-02 21:32:25 · answer #9 · answered by Pooroldpossum 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he is your husband you should be able to have an open covo with him. As for a blow j*b its not you...he is nervous when you are down there. Just talk with him. Better for both of you.
2007-09-02 21:27:49 · answer #10 · answered by Princess J 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋