Hi gang,
I wrote this a few years ago for my Mam. I was reminded of it recently in correspondence with a friend whose love for 'his' Mam was plain to see.
My mother was ill and I came to her bedside. She slept so peacefully, like an angel. Inspiration hit and when I woke her with some tea, an hour later, I gave this poem to her. She cried. I cried. We hugged for an eternity. It was and is one of the most beautiful moments in my life...
Angel’s Child
Sleep a while sweet angel
You have earned your rest
The time has long since passed
When I was carried at your breast
Your work is all but done now
No mother more could do
So now's the time for you to rest
For I can carry you.
Although I am a man now
I still don’t know what I will be
But whenever I'm unsure
It’s your love that steadies me
For no matter what my life demands
One thing I have always sworn;
I will succeed, simply because
Of an angel I was born.
Still gets me, that one...
(tanx for the memory RB)
2007-09-02 18:20:25 · 5 answers · asked by Irish D.... 4 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
Very nice, I enjoyed it very much! I wrote one for my mom years back for mothers day, and had forgotten all about it until reading your poem just now. I hope you don't mind if I share it with you as well...
Tear Stained Pillow
To me your are my safety
My shelter from the storm
Someone who I feel close to
Even when I'm all alone,
My lighthouse in the darkness
To guide me when I'm blind
My breath of crisp fresh air
That calms me every time
You're as selfless as a saint
Giving - Even when not needed
And my favorite tear stained pillow
My comfort when defeated
So please don't feel forgotten
As these busy days unfold
Know how much you're needed
Even if it goes untold.
2007-09-10 10:34:08 · answer #1 · answered by I, Sapient 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lovely poem...I'd like to suggest some edits to make it flow a bit better...but they won't improve the message, you did that "very" well. Here are my suggestions:
Sleep awhile sweet angel
You've certainly earned your rest
The time has long since passed
When you carried me at your breast
Your work is all but done now
No mother more could do
Now's the time for you to rest
And I will carry you.
Although I am a man now
I haven't decided what else I'll be
But Mam, whenever I feel unsure
It’s your love that steadies me
No matter what else my life demands
One thing I have always sworn;
I will succeed, simply because
Of an angel I was born
...just some suggestions to even the meter and the beats...the poem's message couldn't be improved.
keep writing
2007-09-09 05:11:33 · answer #2 · answered by Kevin S 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
D,
It's got a very touching message. It flows well. It's nice when your writing can allow you to have this type of moment. I'm happy for you.
Todd
2007-09-02 22:41:03 · answer #3 · answered by Todd 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're writing is clean and your incredibly honest: what more can a reader ask for. Thanks for sharing this!
2007-09-03 01:16:42 · answer #4 · answered by ObscureB 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why the gang?
2007-09-02 22:30:00 · answer #5 · answered by shakeeb 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋