What's the nicest way to tell your wife she's getting heavy and that you're worried about her?

Question

My wife seems to have put on some weight rather rapidly over the last few months (maybe +20 lbs) and it really kind of worries me. I know any kind of rapid weight change, up or down, is not good. I also know for sure there's almost no polite way to tell a woman she's getting big, learned that the hard way. Not sure what to do about this. She seems healthy enough otherwise. I just don't know how to tell her I'm concerned. I would greatly appreciate some incite with this. Thanks.

Answer 1

Why don't you just say hey, I feel kind of lethargic why don't we join a gym and start working out or running or something. It would give you some quality time together.

Answer 2

Well, you said she seems healthy so what's the problem? Trust me, she has probably noticed her weight gain too. -_-;

If she really has gained 20 lbs then she definitely noticed and is probably even currently thinking about it. It's not a problem unless she's overweight. And she'll probably do something about her weight gain eventually.

Do you know the possible reason behind the weight gain, perhaps?

Well, since you're concerned...you could try hitting the gym by yourself one or twice this week. Maybe she'll start to think, "Hey that's a good idea." You don't have to ask her to come along the first day. If she asks you why you're so interested in the gym all of a sudden, just say you wanted to try going more often to see what it was like.

Go more than once. Then later on, ask her if she wants to come along and sign up for programs together or something so you don't have to go all by yourself. :) It'll be good for the both of you.

Answer 3

Sweet Pea this is very tricky because the last thing any woman wants to hear about is her weight and especially if it is beginning to be a problem. Please for the sake of it make sure she is not pregnant first. If she is not then get a membership at a health club and reverse the role, and let her know you have gain some extra pounds and you would really like for her to work out with you to help motivate you in your weight lost. In the mean time, this will help her to loose the weight she has gained but she is thinking all along she is helping you. Sometimes you just need to reverse it a little Good luck!

Answer 4

the best way is not to . trust me she don't need u to tell her that i am pretty sure that she is aware that she has gain weight. i believe that if u r really concern i would suggest that u b mindful of the things that u cook or the things that u might purchase for her such as chocolate. maybe u both could take walks together,join a health club or maybe bye her a stripper pole. but what ever u decide to do don't make the terrible mistake of telling her something that she already know. believe me nothing good could come out of that.the only thing that that would do would be to bring herself esteem down and it would definitely hurt her feelings and she would not even understand nor would she believe that u only had her best interest at heart. it would only make the problem worse not better. i hope that i was able to help u and i also hope that u understand that as a over weight married woman that the support that my husband has given me i hope that u r able to give your wife the same.good luck

Answer 5

Ask her if everything is OK with her, work, kids relationship and when she says "yeah why?" Then you can tell her that she just doesn't seem like her old self.

Weight gain for women is usually from exhaustion, stress(work or family or relationships) or sometimes it is health related. Just be very careful in how you approach her and try to not mention the weight thing.

I gained and have since lost 20 lbs after my son was born due to exhaustion and stress and my husband picking up a couple of chores and filtering his mother for me has helped me get the energy back to lose it.

You should be just fine!

Answer 6

Could she be pregnant? Are her periods regular? Does she seem to be depressed? weight gain that occurs suddenly is usually the result of pregnancy, a hormonal imbalance or depression that is being relieved by overeating. Probably should talk to her about when she is due for her next "well woman" annual exam. If the doctor sees a substantial weight gain he should be looking for clues as to why. This concern about her health would go a long way towards allieveating the pain of just saying I think you are getting fat. She could have fibroids or something else going on.

Answer 7

If she is not with child, your health concerns are legit. This is a touchy subject for most women. She may be allergic to something she is eating. Things that will cause rapid weight gain are MSG, Gluten, Sugar, and fast foods, Visit the health section of http://www.Stayinformed.info to find out about these things. Make sure the two of you avoid these food additives and ask her to get involved with activities she will get lots of exercise doing. Make sure it is something she really will enjoy. Go bike riding, swimming, play tennis, prepare for a marathon, take her out dancing often, etc. Maybe you won't have to say anything.

Answer 8

Have you gained weight along side her?

There is NO nice way of saying it so instead of making a fool out of yourself and lowering her self esteem which will cause her to gain another 20 pounds , how about you take over the cooking , do healthy food's , chicken / fish , water vegetable's / salad's and take her for walks along a beach or in a park and get out and show her what the outside world looks like .30 minutes a day is all she need's for weight loss.

Good luck.

Answer 9

You could start fixing dinner, healthy meals, this will cut out any junk food and also make her feel better with you chipping in! You can look at your relationship, many women put on weight when they are depressed or going through changes in their lives. Maybe you could suggest that you both start walking in the evenings or mornings, working out together is a great way to get closer with each other.


There is no easy way to start this conversation, but always start with the concern part. Good Luck!

Answer 10

I am pretty sure that you have said something to her about her weight. Understand that she doesnt want to loose weight, then she's not going to be up for it, but if she wants to, then help her loose the weight. Try asking her if she feels happy with herself and if she says no then give her some things that you two can do together. But if she says yes she is happy then I dont think a persons mind can be changed unless God decides to do that for the person.

Answer 11

Say, "honey, are you OK? Are you feeling alright? Because I'm worried about you. You've gained quite a bit of weight lately and that's not like you. So, I'm concerned that perhaps you might be depressed about something." Then see what kind of excuse she gives you.