I'm meeting a man, who is a widower for a year and half, he's been married for 36 yrs. Do you think he is ready to start a new relationship?
2007-09-02 15:08:14 · 15 answers · asked by oliveoil 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hey Sweet friend,
been awhile since I've answered any questions out there,,,,bere;s your question in my email. 1 and 1/2 years...that's a long time to be alone, but 36 years is a long relation too. I'd really listen to your instincts on this one sweetie...you're a smart Lady. Maybe he's ready...maybe he isn't. I wouldn't rule him out just because of his "widower" status...but be aware...he will always love his ex-wife...even he be learns to love you someday. Real love is like that... it lasts forever.
Sincerely,
Mark
2007-09-02 17:21:17 · answer #1 · answered by trustedhacker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everyone is different however there are legitimate reasons to wait a year before beginning a new relationship. It's why people used to wear black for a year-it told the world you were vulnerable and fragile and you should be treated accordingly. I learned about this in grief therapy. I will say however that my father and mother were married 36 years-very happily I might add. My mom died at 61 and my father began dating a few weeks later and living with someone within 3 months. They are married now and seem very happy...it's been six years.
It might be difficult for him, especially at first, but honestly enough time has passed for him to begin again.
2007-09-02 17:21:53 · answer #2 · answered by coolmommy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes . Each person grieves different, but a year and a half is adequate time to wait and to start a new relationship. Take it from some one who is a widow (married 20 years). I just recently started dating myself.(Husband died in 2005). Take your time getting to know each other . Starting dating again after all this time is scary but you know he would not be seeking companionship if he was not ready.
2007-09-02 15:35:19 · answer #3 · answered by Precious 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all it's just a date so don't be too worried.
Now you will have to accept the fact that he will be in love with his wife for the rest of his life.
You should just take it very slow and don't rush him into anything. Just maybe dating, build a friendship but don't try to rush him into any kind of Love because it might scare him away.
You might build a relationship as time goes on just have fun and date but just understand he will always be in love with his wife.
Do I think he's ready for a relationship per se no, not yet. Do I think he's ready to date you, sure.
Only he knows the answer though.
2007-09-02 15:15:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This man has been married for 36 years and is trying to get his self back together after year and half of being alone.
It maybe possible that he is ready for friendship that could blossom into something special. just play it by ear and what ever happens will happen.
wishing you the best
2007-09-02 15:52:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're a irritating lot. What you concern is happening all around you. a guy marrying his bro's widow is a consumer-friendly custom. If it is going to placed you comfy lemme provide a pair of examples . Ba became into elder to Bapu and Nargis too became into elder to Sunil Dutt.If elderly human beings weren't self unsleeping or cautious of social customs you are able to have seen extra such examples.Carve your person direction and stop irritating of traditions.
2016-10-17 13:11:27 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him and see how often he brings his wife into the conversation. If you visit him, see if he has many things displayed of his wife. Although the pictures would be natural, if he still keeps her personal items visibly, it might mean that he cannot let her go yet.
Also if he mentions his wife, see if it brings any emotions in him. If he gets very emotional, almost teary, he is most likely not ready.
2007-09-02 15:20:31 · answer #7 · answered by terliuke 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no way of knowing. does it have to be a "relationship" can't it be companionship? friendship?
are you the first woman he's dated since his wife passed? my dad dated three women before he decided to re marry though he did have an actual relationship with one of the others for a while.
just enjoy his company. what happens, happens.
2007-09-02 15:16:44 · answer #8 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is the only one that can say that he is ready. My uncle's wife died less then a year ago, he is already engaged and now living with his g/f.
2007-09-02 15:15:08 · answer #9 · answered by cris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that's enough time to have grieved and healed as well as he can at this point. Part of his healing process is meeting new people and getting on with his life.
2007-09-02 15:13:17 · answer #10 · answered by gma 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋