2007-09-02 10:06:07 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
"Sorry officer, that was the fake one"
"Didnt I see you get your *** busted on Cops?!"
"I'll get my license if you hold my beer."
"I'm sorry, I didnt mean to speed back there. You see, i was just reaching for my crack pipe when i accidently spilled my beer, and i flinched and stepped on the gas."
"Oink Oink!"
Officer: "Sir, Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?
Guy: "Well your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
"No way! The last officer gave me a warning too!"
"What seems to be the officer problem?"
"I swear to drunk I'm not God!"
"Didn't I see you at Moe's/the bar just a few minutes ago?"
"The legal BAC limit is 12, right?"
2007-09-02 10:12:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 8⤊ 1⤋
16. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.
15. Hey, is that a 9 mm? That's nothing compared to this .44 magnum.
14. What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained specialist.
13. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonald's?
12. Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend's lightstand.
11. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on Cops ?
10. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
9. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
8. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
7. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good job!
6. Excuse me. Is "stick up" hyphenated?
5. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
4. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
3. Bad cop! No donut!
2. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full body cavity searches?
2007-09-02 10:19:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
1. Take your pic officer.... my gun or my box of donuts?
2. that radar gun is incorrect sir... I was actually going 95 MPH not 65MPH.
3. Hey, I used to date your FATHER
4. Gee officer I'm really glad you didn't see the load of illegal fireworks I have in my trunk
5. Want a TOKE?
6. Hey, if you have a minute, I have an extra glass in the back seat
7. You're cute (not good if you AND the cop are men, OR both women)
8. A Person? I thought it was a SPEED BUMP!!!!
9. what license?
10. My name is PARIS HILTON
2007-09-02 10:31:40 · answer #3 · answered by LittleBarb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I never enjoyed hearing "you're wrong and I'll see you in court!" that always made me be absolutely letter perfect in my notes on the back of the ticket so when they showed up to court I would win the case no problem.
If you want to actually get out of a ticket, what worked with me and made me at least maybe reduce the speed I wrote you for was "I'm sorry, I was speeding and I really have no excuse." I let more people off with warnings for that than you would ever believe...
2007-09-02 17:20:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey, shouldn't you be at the Krusty Kreme bakery right now officer Wiggum?
2007-09-02 10:17:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Point to his middle and reply "How many doughnuts did it take to make that spare tire" or When he confronts you about jail reply "Well it's free food and board, If it's free I'm not complaining"
2007-09-02 13:27:19 · answer #6 · answered by tollegater 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I only hit 2 out 3 people back there GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!
2007-09-02 10:11:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
See i believe that police are just like regular people so whatever you wouldnt say to anyone else, dont say to them.
2007-09-02 10:20:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'll cut you in if you can just shut the hell up and let me finish this deal.
2007-09-02 10:18:50 · answer #9 · answered by Nagitar™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you not out there, arresting "REAL" criminal's, not people like me, who only made a small mistake, I got caught.
2007-09-02 10:15:46 · answer #10 · answered by Mmichael0 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋