Is this flirting?

Question

I'm engaged to be married and I do love my fiance very much. This new girl started not too long ago at my work. She is pretty and we smile at each other, but I don't think nothing more of that. The thing is is she will always come up from behind me and grab me quickly, like she is trying to scare me, and the other night I did the same thing to her, but I was just doing it to get back at her for scaring me. She hardly speaks a lick of english (she's hispanic) and she tries to talk to me..even though I can't understand her. Like I said I don't think nothing of any of this because I love my fiance, but is all the smiling, talking, and attempting scaring flirting? Honest opinions please

Answer 1

If it means nothing to you then it's nothing. Sounds like she's just comfortable with you. knowing their culture it's very likely that she just finds a friendly and cozy person around your workplace and that happens to be you. I came from a country very similar to hers and this thing is very common among friends and co-workers. Just in case her actions progress into something else, make it a point to express your uneasiness. she should understand right away.

Answer 2

Dude Correct me if I'm wrong But the last time I checked a common language was not a requirement for flirting or any sexual activity that may result from that flirting.
Bottom line is that you crossed the line .Since she couldn't communicate with you by talking to you she communicated with you by smiling at you and touching you . You indicated that you understood the message by responding in kind and really even if people speak the same language a smile followed by a touch is a pretty standard flirting technique .
You really need to review your company's sexual harrasment policies and you need to find a friggin translator and tell this young woman what's going on .There is no way of knowing how that converstion will go but it is important to the rest of your life that you initiate before she does.
You also need to be honest about the whole thing. When a pretty young women is interested in you, it feels great and to say it doesn't is bullspit but you gotta know that you can never act on it and touching is strictly verboten.
Go home take a cold shower, listen to Johnny Cash singing "I walk the the line " and realize that the reason some men don't ever cheat on their wives is not because of who the wife is but rather because of who the man is
Good luck

Answer 3

The smiling and talking doesn't seem to be a problem but the whole scaring each other at work thing is a bad idea. One, it's not being professional at work and it could possibly lead to other things that can involve being all touchy feely. Try and ask your fiance to stop by your work for lunch or something since you can't really explain to your co-worker that you're engaged and maybe she'll get the message. Hopefully, that will set boundaries for the both you. Good luck!

Answer 4

It sounds like she's flirting with you. Since she doesn't understand English, she may not realize that you're already taken.

It's good that you're not trying to flirt back, but being friendly but think about how you'd feel if you found out your fiance was doing the same thing with a male coworker of hers. If it would bother you, then stop doing it. If it wouldn't bother you, then maybe it's nothing. I would at least make it clear to the friendly woman that you have a fiance (Something like 'Oh I tried doing that to my fiance the other day and I got her good!').

Answer 5

Well since she doesn't speak good English she may be getting a different Idea from you! And its hard for you and her to understand the boundary's you have! You may want to kind of slow down on the smiles, it sounds like the girl thinks you like her! Smiles don't count really as cheating unless its a smile like come over here i want your number type of thing... but touching is a leading sign of liking someone! That's my opinion! (I'm engaged as well)

Answer 6

You are infatuated with her and i think you might love your fiance but i don't think your in love with her. If not you wouldn't be opening doors that should be kept locked at all times. Don't get married yet you are not ready, when you are ready woman will read that in your Ora and stay away from you. Your Ora is saying available so your the one not ready for marriage. Don't become a statistic, your showing signs of what the future might hold if you get married.

Answer 7

hello. I would not call this flirting. Just mostly having fun at work. Its ok to have a female friend that you can joke around with. Flirting is more play pushing or rubbing up against someone or winking. Smiling and talking are just things kind people do. So in my opinion this is not flirting at all.
I hope this helped. :-)

Answer 8

the talking and smiling is fine, the grabbing is a bit more personal I would say, and by doing the same to her, you could be giving her the impression you are interested in her in a certain way, which obviously you are not.
I wouldn't avoid her, or stop talking to her, but as for the hands-on stuff, give it a miss. You could end up being sued for sexual harassment apart from anything else.

Answer 9

The honest answer is stop doing what you are doing because like you mentioned...you started with smiling at eachother and then now you "scare" eachother. It will just escalate and soon you will do something or say something you will regret!

Answer 10

be very carful, she might not speek good english but she may be quick enough to make a complaint against you when she dosnt like it or changes he moind bowt u. if u love her then dont flirt with others. one day u might all av to go to an emas party or end of year meal and they might have to meet and lets just hope she dont try and scare u when ur bird is their or u will be in trouble, gd luck xx