You are well-educated.However,your husband doesn't want you to go out and work.He says tht he wants you to relax at home,have fun with family and friends,pursue hobbies and be always there for him when he returns home from office after a tiring day.He provides you with ample freedom,the only restriction being tht he doesn't wish to have a career-oriented wife who keeps running after money and power,neglecting her home and family.
In return,he provides you with all the comforts in life,respects you,is very loving and caring and is a wonderful dad to your kids.
How many among you would stay happy with such a man? Pls give me your sincere answers.
2007-09-01 23:44:07 · 29 answers · asked by Sunflower 5 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
i guess it would be okay for the first few years. i mean, every new couple wants to spend a lot of time with their family, especially if they have little kids.
but what would happen after 5, 6, 7 or even more years onwards? the mental strain that would happen isnt caused by stress, but possibly by boredom, especially if, before getting married, you had a perspective of what you want to become - otherwise, why get a very good education? you might start thinking about how worthless your talents and good education have become. if this happens, depression might get in you, and into your family.
maybe having a home-based business or a part-time job could help. i think in this situation where the husband doesnt want you to go out and work, this is the best solution. try talking with your husband and hopefully you two can meet each other halfway.
2007-09-02 00:00:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Hi .firstly it depends on person to person that whether one will b happy or not, so u can't generalise this.I think wen ur husband is giving u so much in life to u,and just want one thing in return,then at least one can manage this much,but it is only possible wen both of them have gr8 love for each other.Bcoz every relation not only husband and wife demands sacrifice in life.Like in this situation just think the other way round that u r well educated and have a good job,but due to financial requirements or anything else, u have to work really hard and have no time for yourself and ur kids and ur husband says he loves u but he is damn bothered about ur comfort and wants u to earn more and more money.then would u like it.So its just that he loves u and is working hard to give u all comforts of life,so that u b happy.One must remember that no one gets everything in life.So if there is love b/w the two then adjustments can b done.And i would say that i will b quite happy wid such a man,provided there is love in the relationship.
2007-09-03 23:16:18 · answer #2 · answered by krcr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's absolutely nothing wrong with that, if that's what you truly desire. Some women are quite happy living the life you just described. However, truthfully, I know a lot of stay-at-home moms who wanted to be at home, but in so doing, found that the reality of it was a bit less fulfilling and idealistic than the picture you have painted of it here. Then there were some who were very happy with the arrangement, up until the time when the kids grew up and really didn't need them around as much anymore. Then they became depressed and unhappy.
Guess it depends on the woman, her husband, and her family. If it works for them, I think that's great. It just doesn't always work for everyone.
2007-09-01 23:59:12 · answer #3 · answered by It's Ms. Fusion if you're Nasty! 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
This is not my ideal life. I don't work to "run after power and money," I work because I enjoy what I do. The idea of a husband "providing ample freedom" is repugnant; it makes me think I should get on my knees and thank him for his generosity. I am not "career-oriented" as if I made a choice; neither do I "neglect" my home and family. It's called life, and I live it the way I want. I chose the best man in the world . . . and he chose me.
2007-09-02 05:46:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have friends in your situation. Sometimes when children are young they occupy all your time. But they will become more and more self-sufficient and you will inevitably get bored. You don't have to a have a full-time career, but work just enough to feel like you're not losing touch with the world. Work is not only for financial reasons, but also mental and social, and every woman has the right to be doing something fulfilling (besides childcare) if she so desires. Also, God forbid, in the unlikely event of divorce or widowhood, you still want to have your survival skills intact. Your husband should be able to understand your need to spread your wings (why waste an education?) while still being a good wife and mother. If he doesn't, he's very controlling- not a good quality in a spouse.
2007-09-02 00:50:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
When I was younger (in my 20s/30s) I was very career-driven and would have answered NO to your question, even tho' I had my son at 29 and kept working, was a single mom for 7+ years and it was tough (but I still wouldn't trade the experience for the world).
But now that I'm in my 40s and less career-driven, a little more tired of working every day, remarried to a wonderful man (almost like you described) and my son is in college....I would have to answer your question YES. I could say yes, I could see myself staying home and doing some volunteer work, working on my hobbies (knitting, beading, sewing), possibly working part-time or on-call but being home when he was home. I can't wait for that day. I have only 9 more years until I am eligible to retire at full pension (if we can afford it) and if I'm able I will do it.
So.....YES, as an educated woman, I would love to be in that situation now!!
2007-09-02 04:52:23 · answer #6 · answered by Jenyfer J 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Screw that. A career is something I've been working for, as well as an independent life. My husband does not tell me how to live my life, just because he's had it in his mind to stay in the fifties with the "happy housewife". Searching for happiness should not just be yielded to him. If a career makes me happy, I'm going for my career. He can do as he pleases. We live equally, together, as well as independently. If i wanted to, i could stay home and keep the house and family, but my happiness is a priority as well as my family. I choose to have a career and a family.
You're not his maid. If a career will make you happy, then tell him. Just because he "wants" the happy housewife, does not mean he gets it. He needs to deal with that.
2007-09-02 07:50:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
And what do you do when the kids are grown and can fend for themselves? How fun is it to always "be there for him" at his beck and call? Who is going to "be there" for you? Nice of him to provide you with everything, but my experience has been that a lot of men throw that in your face when they get angry.
Respect is earned, and if you are not "earning" anything, the respect isn't there where men are often concerned. If he can see the value of your staying home, that is wonderful, but be prepared for when you're no longer needed as a stay at home mom. That is when you will really need something to occupy your time.
2007-09-02 05:08:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-03 12:31:11 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is obviously only concerned with what he wants. What if the woman wants to have a job and a career? Would he disregard her feelings and tell her that oh well, I don't want you to have a career and as payment for this I'll take care of you. I for one would have a problem if my husband insisted that I not work. But I would not have a problem if he didn't want to me to work if it didn't make me happy to work.
2007-09-02 14:28:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋