What am i sexuality wise. What do you think this secret means. And what to do about all of it.. PLEASE REPLY!?

Question

I have always been attracted to girls personalities. I only really like guys for looks, and i am sexually attracted to them. I could get turned on by seeing a guy nude, but not a girl. Only i am falling head over heels for my best friend who is also a girl like me. Its been this way for two years. I know its more than friendship but shes had plenty of boyfriends. She hasnt dated in a while because most of the guys were jerks but sometimes i think she might be bi too. She told me she has a secret that would make me and my friends think differently of her. I asked if it was something she did and she said no, it wasnt like that. She said it was something that would make us look at her in disgust. She said she really wanted to say what it was but it was best if she didnt because it would make situations with her and me and my friends awkward after that. What do you think the secret is and what should i do about all this? She said she'd say it when the time is right but i think thats never

We both come from families that think homosexuality is disgusting, wrong and that its a choice. But sometimes i feel like she might be bi too... i want to tell her and i know many people think its just a phase but its not. Does that sound like she could be bi too or am i just getting my hopes up for something that probably isnt even there? Please help me out and if anyone had the same problem, let me know what happened. Or if you are going through that.

also. the other day we were using my jacket, her arm in one side and my arm in the next and i asked why she wanted to stay like that because she could just take the whole thing because i wasnt cold, and she said it felt warmer like that because of body heat i guess. And i was like well why didnt you just say that? and shes like i didnt want you think i was gay or something.

Answer 1

Women getting involved with other women is not homosexuality. It is much more acceptable. It is very popular with heterosexual women who like men. So just tell her that you like men but want to try something extra on the side.

For men relationships are more physical but for women it is less physical so best friends get involved. I had a girlfriend. She has been married with kids for many years. Before me she was invoved with her best friend (female).

That friend is now married with kids. They could not find a boyfriend at that time even though they were trying so they got involved with each other. No big deal. Lesbians are not attracted to men. Site below tells about people that are not male or female.

Answer 2

You need to ask her about the secret and assure her that no matter what she tells you, you won't think less of her. Then, if it's not what you want to hear, you respect that and don't judge. If it's that she's attracted to you, explain how you are feeling and go from there.

Sexuality is very fluid; it's not black and white. There are many shades of gray. You can be in love with someone without being sexually involved with or sexually attracted to them; you can be sexually attracted to a person you would never want to have an actual relationship with. I know women who would never self identify as gay or bisexual who are definitely turned on by the idea of being with a woman, but it's simply their fantasy. I know celibate gay people.

You could take the plunge and explain how you feel about her. You risk being rejected, and you risk your secret coming out. I'd recommend discussing this with someone who knows you well that you are sure won't judge and/or condemn you if you do realize that you are gay or bi. Good luck.

Answer 3

I think that you shouldn't be overly concerned with whatever sexual preference you or her have. Each person should be loved and accepted for what they are.

As far as your friend goes, when you get an opportunity or the topic comes up, why not just tell her you value people no matter what orientation they are.

I am straight, but I know many gay and bisexual people because of the industry I work in. From what I have seen the gay community in general is very accepting of others and wish the straights were as open-minded and free.

Answer 4

It seems like you have two questions here. The first is about yourself and the second is about your friend. I think you are admitting that you are bisexual. I am sorry that this would cause your parents some discomfort and possibly pain. How you handle it is up to you. You could seek therapeutic help to manage this situation.
I think your friend has conflicting feelings about being bisexual and she may not want to admit it either to herself and/or anyone else. I think that you will just have to wait until she figures it out for herself and whether or not she can trust you with this information. Any attempt by you to explore it may result it the dissolution of your friendship and possibly other friendships. This issue is a somewhat touchy issue with many people and you may have to seek a certain community of friends that are tolerant in the future. Live in peace.

Answer 5

You didn't say how old you are. That's important, because a lot of girls find other girls attractive. You may only feel this way about your friend because you feel so close to her. However, perhaps you are gay, but if so, you said you were attracted to guys, so chances are, you're just curious. Don't worry. You'll quickly figure this out.

Answer 6

What am i sexuality wise?
I think you sound like a regular girl.

What do you think this secret means.
I think that what ever it is, unless its some type of crime like murder, it should not bother you because you are friends.

And what to do about all of it?
I think you should just be friends with her. cause friendships are more important and last longer than relationships.