H'e getting ready to crash again, I can tell when it's coming. I really need to get out of this relationship.
Been together 10 years
2007-09-01 02:51:03 · 9 answers · asked by monabow 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
By appreciating the relief you will eventually get when you do leave. You have no power to cure him even if you wanted to stay in the relationship.
2007-09-01 03:00:40 · answer #1 · answered by pufferoo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bi-polar disorder is one of the most difficult things in the world to deal with. I have a close friend with bi-polar disorder. She is well-managed with medication and does everything right, but I still cannot imagine how she will ever be able to marry or have children. Even well-managed bi-polar is a nightmare.
My guess is that you know this now, but you probably didn't when you met your partner. My guess is that you wish it were different but that you can't change the situation and it's ruining your life.
I don't know how to tell you not to feel guilty--you probably will, no matter what you do--but I will tell you that you deserve to live your own life and not to allow it to be destroyed by someone else's illness. Leave; the guilt may be the price you need to pay to get your life back.
2007-09-01 11:17:48 · answer #2 · answered by Helen W. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he seeing a doctor? Has he been on medication? Is he TRYING to help himself?
If you answered yes to these questions, then you might want to stick around a little while until he gets the help he needs. Once the chemicals balance out from the medication, he will probably become himself again and you can enjoy your relationship again, eventually.
If you answered no, then you need to just leave. If he is not willing to help himself at all, then things are only going to get worse. You know that the way he is right now is not good for you. As far as the guilt, it will take time for you to feel good about the situation, but in the end, maybe by you leaving him, he will find that he really needs to get help. It might be the best decision for both of you.
Lots of luck and remember that you're happiness in life counts for a lot.
2007-09-01 11:03:13 · answer #3 · answered by Strawberry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was this person seeking help? If not, no guilt. Living with a bi-polar person is very difficult. Sometimes it takes drastic measures for them to get help. I've seen it happen. If they are real about the illness and in counseling and properly taking meds they can turn things around. Don't feel guilt about possibly doing what it takes for them to seek help! Good luck :)
2007-09-01 10:01:50 · answer #4 · answered by oracleofohio 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Many people live Bi-polar spouses. He controls his mood and behavior with medication and sees a doctor, he can lead a normal life. I believe you are using this as an excuse to leave. Bi-polar characteristics are: mood swings, highs and lows. Kind of reminds you of what men put up with. Especially at that time of the month.
2007-09-01 13:45:00 · answer #5 · answered by Arvind N 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My mom is still with my dad, and it's been almost thirty years with him. He even took all the money and went to the Phillippines to be with a girl he knows online and calls his "daughter" but talks to in a different way on the phone all day and online all day. He came back home and was HURT that she didn't want to pick him up at the airport!!!!
But she's still with him...till their joint debts...are paid off. She may stay with him beyond that or till he leaves. She keeps deciding to stay for one reason or another. He even drove her psycho sometimes when she used to be so nice. She allowed herself to be abused too, in front of us, while growing up, and that is the man she chose to remain with as the guy who showed our family what guys are about...even though she knew better....
I think you should consider counseling first. It was hard deciding to get into this relationship, then staying, so you will need counseling to help with your feelings that guide your decision making.
2007-09-01 10:02:21 · answer #6 · answered by *october girl* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no reason to impose feelings of guilt on yourself.* That is a choice you and only you must make. If a person is not or is incapable of contributing to your happiness, why should you spend your life being miserable and unhappy for anyone. That to me is insane in itself. You must be the change you wish to see in the World. Break the habit of self imposed GUILT.* There is no value or benefit to you for doing so.*
2007-09-01 13:52:56 · answer #7 · answered by dca2003311@yahoo.com 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dealing with someone with bi-polar is one of the hardest things anyone can deal with....i have a friend who has it and her husband only stays for the sake of the kids, I don't know how he does it... don't feel guilty cause to be honest i couldn't deal with it ...........
2007-09-01 10:03:22 · answer #8 · answered by tinkerbell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
remember your marriage vows "for better or for worse in sickness and in health richer or poorer" your husband is sick he needs love understanding support and comfort from you now more then ever.you dont walk away when things get tough,there is counseling to help you cope, he is suffering more then you. be strong stay with him.find help for yourself and help your husband get thru this difficult time.best wishes.
2007-09-01 11:05:24 · answer #9 · answered by jenny_1679 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋