I guess technically he's my ex now, but he still lives with me, and we have a child together. anyways he doesnt pick up after himself, and will only watch our 8 month old for about 5 minutes before he starts playing video games or gets on the computer or goes out. He doesnt get that i need time for myself too and that I'm not HIS mother and he needs to pick up after himself. got any ideas to get it through his thick skull?
2007-08-31 11:50:59 · 18 answers · asked by Sarah L. 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
ok so i have threatened him.
he wont leave I've tried booting him and he's threatened me with taking my son.
he pays my bills which arent much, but still.
i have a friend that chews him out everytime she sees him out and i'm not with, and well, pretty much everytime she sees him
2007-08-31 12:02:18 · update #1
by taking him i mean he'll take him out of state down to his mommy.
and his parents are big into legal loopholes and sueing ppl so I'm scared they'll drum up something to come after me or let him get out of all responsibility. I mean, these people dont even have to pay taxes because of what they know.
and most likely if i throw his stuff away he'll throw mine away or worse.
2007-08-31 12:33:24 · update #2
Tell him to grow up or your gone. I have the same thing. My husband is 21 and has the job, plays games, I have to be like his mother for him to pay attention to me and help me. His mother abused him though. Men like that need to grow up if they want to be with a girl and be fathers. I would get a job and start planning for the future..which might not include him. He has no right to take your kid, since he's not that good a parent. You can get a job, he can't grow up in 24 hours. If he is as negligent as he is now then he will be when and if he takes your child away.
2007-08-31 12:06:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the other person. Why is he still living with you? You have to take care of your 8 month old only not him too. I had an ex like that and all he wanted to do was go out drinking with his friends and hang out all weekend and no time with the family, he is lazy doesn't want to do jack S*** around the house, never says thank you for the things you do for him and don't never care about what I think never! So I kicked him out and now he lives with his mommy and his new wife and new baby. I tell you what I feel sorry for the guy and sorry for you too if you keep it up. If you can figure out how to work it out then do it but I tried for 7 long years and i gave up. At the end I found a real man........Happily ever after........
2007-08-31 18:59:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't pick up after him!
He is not your child, he is a grown man with a baby. You need to let him grow up or move out. Moving out is not so great an idea since you have a baby and you need his help. So don't pick up after him for a couple of days 1st. He will complain, then gets pissed off, let him, walk way when he acts like a child. Do this for two months, he will be a different man.
2007-08-31 19:06:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shame works best, especially after a breakup. Invite yours and his friends over either to help you with something or just to hang out. Make sure it's a time when he is there. They'll see him being useless and that should shame him into helping.
Of course, if he's not helping out around the apartment, then why keep him around. Kick him out.
2007-08-31 18:56:21 · answer #4 · answered by stn1225 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you keeping him around because of hm threatening to take the child? if so then your foolish...i dont mean to be harsh but you said yourself he only watches him for a few minutes at a time ...what makes you think he would even consider taking on the resposibility of a child when its quite clear he cant even take care of himself? If you are keeping him around for his money then you will just have to suck it up because its your choice....He sounds like a child to me...so i will tell you what i do to my kids..if after i have asked them to pick up there things several times and they dont do it i throw it in the garbage...simple yet effective...after either loosing something they like or having to dig through the garbage for it a few times ,they usually pick up stuff on there own now, with out me having to say anything...give it a try you might be suprised at how willing he will be to pick up after himself when a few video games have been tossed...
2007-08-31 19:23:47 · answer #5 · answered by tee_girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, tell him to get his *** out then. Or better yet...take all of his mess and pile it in "his area".........That would piss me off. I have a guy that I live with and we have a son together and if he did not help me and sat on his butt all the time I would say something and my tone would be stern and possibly really loud.
2007-08-31 18:59:46 · answer #6 · answered by lovenstrength83 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him, "Help out or get out." Quit being his mommy.
Sounds like he has a sweet deal, no responsibilities, three hots and a cot. Come's and goes, as he please's. He needs to be prodded to grow up.
It appears you don't need him, so why keep him around?
2007-08-31 19:00:55 · answer #7 · answered by Joker 1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him if he doesn't do his share he will need to pay you for picking up his stuff. if he doesn't help or listen, gather all his things and pile them onto his side of/ or bed. Call a babysitter and go out once a week to a spa or something.
2007-08-31 18:56:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, after two years of that I just left. I can handle doing it all all by myself, but not when i could have had help, but he wouldnt.... we are better off this way. we get along better, there is less stress, and we can function as parents. otherwise, you could just dump a bucket of ice water over his head... lol j/k!
2007-08-31 18:56:45 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello sarah just tell him that you arent going to keep picking up after him all the time dear and also tell him that there is the door if he dont like what you tell him to do for you
2007-08-31 19:00:04 · answer #10 · answered by harold gardner1946 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋