Why and when did so many men stop being "men"?

Question

I look about me now and I see so many "men" acting as boys. And I'm talking about adults. Is it the whole concept of "metrosexual" that has allowed this to happen? What happened to the man being the protector. Is what women want a "feeling" man. One that "understands" her?

Isn't that what girlfriends are for? Do they really want an emasculated, leg shaving, fearful boy instead of a man?

If so, it looks like they are getting what they want.

I was brought up to be the man that stood in front of the woman loved in times of danger. Not next to her.

Answer 1

First, to the guy who said "men found out there's more to life than beer, football, and hooters": You're right. There's also hockey. Screw you.

And also, to another answerer, being a real man has nothing to do with being abusive. I believe that any man that would beat their woman is an even bigger pussy than the guy who shaves his leg, and I'm sure Mark (the asker) would agree.

Now to the question at hand: Real men started dying in the early '70s when we were taught to be open with our feminine sides. This was a good and healthy step for our gender, so we all took it. What we didn't know is that is was the first step in a tumble down a staircase of perfume and depilatory creams.

I don't know why we didn't stop, but I'm with you man. Most of the women I date seem drawn to me merely because I'm not a pansy pushover like the "pretty boys" they've dated before. Women like a challenge as much as men do, and that challenge is to find a strong man and be the one to soften him, not the challenge of figuring out who's makeup is who's in the morning.

I don't know what happened, Mark, but you, me, Chuck Norris, and the other couple hundred real men in the world just need to grab our women and find a jungle somewhere and live out our lives in peace (well, we'll war with neighbouring tribes, because we're men, but you get the idea).

Answer 2

Fantastic question Mark! I so agree with you, of course I am older, so I prefer a man, a real man. But I have a feeling that those days are gone, at least for now.

Somewhere between the 70's when I got married and the current day the boys as they grow up seem to be coddled more by Mommy, and then even after they leave the house, they seem to turn and ask Mommy to do so much for them, that they haven't a clue how to stand on their own two feet.

I think a lot of it has to do with in the "older" days, you registered for the draft, served your country, and came home as "men".

I can only hope that the real men return - quickly!

It is ok to be caring, and feeling, but can't you be men at the same time?

Answer 3

Men stopped being men when they lost their fathers and their fathers stopped caring about their sons becoming men when selfishness swept the country. Part of God and Country is family. I find this value still holds in more common-sense-strong places in the country. Promise Keepers mens conference, was a response to men Seen as reaching for help about themselves about holding marriages together. Schools snd families do not talk about loyalty and sacrfice and the feeling good reward of a hard days work. Women cannot make men. Men have to make men. Women, mothers, can ruin men by being continually overly crotically. They can help to make men by asking questions and supporting them rather them killig off any dreams that are left.

Answer 4

Hmmm. When I first started reading your question, I immediately thought of the generations of men who are still playing video games and hanging out w/ their guy friends all the time. (you mentioned them acting like boys)
Upon further reading, you are actually talking about metros. I find that even more interesting than my aforementioned assumption.
Perhaps I'm in the minority. I like a man who has a 5 o'clock shadow and is rugged in many ways. I don't fancy a man who takes longer in the bathroom than I do...there's nothing attractive about that. I will totally take a brute protector over a waxed, tweezed, polished pretty boy.

(No offense to those who happen to be this or like this....it's just not for me).

Answer 5

Well, look at TV. What figure on family tv shows is often the boob or butt of jokes? A true dufus who cannot do right and is often portrayed as inept and useless?

Fathers. By and large we show husbands, on TV and in movies, as know-nothings who are either true dolts or hell-bent, power hungry and heartless.

Also, look at pop-culture. Its popular now to treat women as objects. Don't know why, but it is.

Look at how we celebrate Fathers Day versus Mothers Day.

Oh, and how many stories do you hear about single fathers who step up to raise a child after a woman leaves the child behind to run off?

It happens just as often as it does for women who raise them as single parents.

It really does.

There's a multitude of reasons

Answer 6

As for why:
Taking on responsiblity and making strong statements seems to be "out", apparently. It may have something to do with the situation we are in as a society. Things are so out of control that no one can, or wants to, "be a man" about it. We are witnessing mass resignation.
And when:
It came blinking on and off since the hippie era, but has come on pretty permanently in some Northern European countries around 1985. It seems to have trickled into North America around 2000.

Answer 7

i blame Will and Grace ..An Hollywood and the government. Telling us we can't be anti - anything anymore .We can't speak out like George Jefferson or Archie Bunker no more. Because too many people are sensitive. We can't joke no more without AL Sharp ton them getting in a tizzy or Peta, or the Gay community getting upset. We just can't be REAL and HONEST an laugh about tit like back in the 70's and 80's .You could say something and ppl laughed about it now u have to be so hush hush like we live in RUSSIA . Since 9/11 its become a communist country , and watch it is going to be that way real soon .Its already here but its gonna be really here after this president ail election .Watch by the year 2013 its gonna be more surveillance on people whom aren't terrorists at all.

Answer 8

I love a man who wraps his arms around you and you immediately feel safe..A man who just acts cool but if he sees someone upseting you all he has to do is give that person the look and it makes you feel like a princess...Its so romantic....A real hottie, rough and tough for his woman but soft and sensitive behind closed doors.

Answer 9

Plenty of women still appreciate masculinity,but I agree that the trend you cite is urban. I just don't think it's an urban-chic anti-masculine thing; I think you inadvertently hit the nail on the head when you pointed out the trend is be boyish. They actually want to stay young. So it isn't a rejection of maleness,it's an adoration of youth and a desire to play the young dude for as long as possible. And I think that exaggerated veneration of youth has always been typical of urban ultraliberals.

Answer 10

To an extent I agree with you, but you're attacking this from a different angle than I would. I would question, what happened to chivalry? Now men are more disrespectful to women than ever before it seems. No door-holding, no more "ladies first". There is barely a gentleman left on earth it seems, and us ladies are putting up with it.

Now I don't mean being a p*ssy. Being polite is just a load of crap if you're a big fat p•ssy. I mean kicking some other guys a** type of stuff if the other guy looks at his lady sideways. My man owns me and I like it. There's nothing more manly than taking charge of your woman.