My bf and I have been together 7 years, so his family is like my family. The problem is they are ALWAYS late!! It drives me nuts. My bf was out of town last week and I was meeting his parents at a resturant and they left me waiting by myself for 45 minutes. They pull stuff like that all the time. In a serious convo I've said I don't appreciate it, and I've also tried joking about it. It makes me feel like they have no respect for me. Should I just forget about it? It starts me so mad at the beginning of the evening I can't even enjoy my time with them. Am I overreacting? I don't even want to make plans with them anymore!
2007-08-31 06:50:46 · 17 answers · asked by ○•○•Cassie•○•○ 6 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Give them a taste of their own medicine.
If any of them has the audacity complain when you arrive X minutes late, innocently shrug and say something like, "Gee, I just concluded that we all don't stand on formality."
Barring that, I would just bring a book with me and spend the time reading. Fuming about it is just needlessly raising your blood pressure. What they're doing is rude, but since you've already talked to them about it AND tried to use humor, it sounds like they're set in their ways.
If you ever end up marrying your boyfriend, do NOT delay the ceremony on the big day for any of these clods, beyond the standard 5-10 minutes.
2007-08-31 07:02:56 · answer #1 · answered by The Snappy Miss Pippi Von Trapp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it makes you feel any better, most people know a person or persons exactly like this.
I don't necessarily think you are overreacting, but you have to understand that this is the way they are and they are not going to change.
I have a similar problem with one of my friends. What we do is that we tell them that we are all meeting somewhere 30 minutes before we are actually going to be there. For example, we are meeting at noon, but we tell him 11:30.
He ends up showing up at noon, when everyone else is just getting there.
Give this a shot with your b/f parents. At the very least, if they actually ARE on time, you will feel a little vindicated since they have been doing it to you all this time.
2007-08-31 14:04:07 · answer #2 · answered by Stupid Flanders 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make plans but always tell them 30 earlier than you plan to be there.
You are just a timely person, I'm the same way. But my family on the other hand is ALWAYS late for everything. Used to drive me crazy! Not anymore...if I make plans I tell them 30 minutes earlier or they make plans I show up 30 to 45 minutes late.
2007-08-31 13:56:31 · answer #3 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not overreacting, but you're going to have to adapt if you want to be with your bf. I have a friend who is always at least a half hour late. So when I make plans with her, I either make plans for a half hour earlier, or I show up a half hour late. It sure beats being pissed off all the time.
2007-08-31 13:56:21 · answer #4 · answered by Happy Britches 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being late is disrespectful in my opinion. My dad's side of the family is like this a lot. So we now just tell them that it starts a half hour earlier then it really does...honestly it works haha. But I agree with you it's completely disrespectful, especially if it is more of a habitual thing then a once in a while, can't find my keys type of thing. Maybe talk to your boyfriend about it, he might have more influence over their actions then you?
2007-08-31 13:57:09 · answer #5 · answered by ladydilpickle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably are overreacting, but I'm exactly the same as you!
I have one friend who if I want to meet up with her at 8 I have tell her 7 just so she gets there on time! It drives me crazy.
It is rude of them, but try not to let them get to you, you may end up falling out which would be a shame.
2007-08-31 13:55:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not. If they are not willing to take the time (pardon the pun) to show up when they say they will, that shows a lack of respect. Are they of old time values? They may think that because you haven't married him that you are not deserving of respect. Or, I hate to say this, they simply do not approve of you and are trying to subtly push you out of his life. After all the family comes part and parcel with the bf. Don't go out of your way to make plans with them anymore, only do things with them when the bf is there and see if that helps. They may come to realize what they were doing and amend their behavior.
2007-08-31 13:59:58 · answer #7 · answered by poohbear_daboy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Someone being constantly late is a sure sign that they don't respect your time. The next time you invite them, let them know that you will not be able to wait if they are late. If they have a negative reaction to that just tell them that your time is important to you and you don't like to waste it on people who don't support that.
2007-08-31 13:58:42 · answer #8 · answered by ♫Problem Child♫ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Turn the tables on them and be late yourself. Then maybe they'll really get the hint. That, or give them a 15 minute grace period. And if they don't show up, leave. You have better things to do. Tell them 'Something came up".
2007-08-31 13:55:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know people like that too. They arent trying to be rude or disrepect you.. they are just LATE all the time. Its like a habit.. Try asking them to call your cell phone if they are going to be late. Or tell them to meet you at 1pm when you really want to see them at 130pm.. My brother is like that so I tell him to be somewhere 30 min before I really want him there. Its worked really well for me!
2007-08-31 13:56:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋