first bra stories advice and help?

Question

I am flat chested and in 8th grade going to hs. i have little buds but i really want a bra . how should i ask my mother about it. what if she says that i dont need one then that will just be embarrassing. my brother teases me about having nothing. and my cuzin whos younger than me already has way bigger breast then me and when we do sleepovers with her 2 sisters who are 14 and 15 wth bras too, i feel left out and very uncomfortable. one time one of them said ewww you dont wear bras!!!!!! they talk about bra shopping and everything and i'm just left out. In school too everyone is already devloped and i think that when the girls talk about it in the locker room and stuff they look at me or weird and that even makes me feel worse. please can you help!!

telling your first bra story might help

Answer 1

Ugh, I'm so sorry your cousins and brother and classmates have been so horrible to you! I promise, this is the worst they'll ever be. People are never as nasty again as they are when they're in your age range. Hang in there, it will turn out all right in the end.
I wouldn't worry about talking to your mom. Moms were young girls once too, and they know how awkward and embarassing this subject is to a girl. Your mom is probably cooler than you think. :-) Just tell her you want to start wearing a bra. She knows you're growing up and I doubt she'll be very surprised. It seems like a really big deal to you, but it won't to her, just her daughter coming of age.
I was a very secretive kid and nothing could have seemed more embarassing to me than asking my mother for my first bra. So what I ended up doing was taking a girlfriend on a family shopping trip, going off with her on our own for a little while (with permission!) and buying one ourselves with my saved allowances! Then I changed into it in the bathroom, threw out the bag and receipt to destroy the evidence, and wore it in secret (or so I thought) for the next year or so, keeping it under my mattress! I don't know what horrible thing I was afraid would happen if I let my mother know I wanted a bra. Finally, probably suspecting what was going on, my mom pulled me aside one day and cheerfully suggested that we go on a girls-only shopping trip and get me some bras and school clothes (it was the beginning of the school year). It was completely fine. So much worry over such a non-issue! But it makes a funny story now. So don't worry, growing up is tough for all of us. :-)
And also, just remember that, it may seem like, just because a lot of other girls in your class are developed, that everybody's "normal" and you're just weird. But that's just not true. I promise, EVERYBODY in your class has something they feel weird about, or something that they're worried isn't normal or is wrong about them or their bodies, no matter how good they may be at hiding their insecurity. And they're worried that everybody ELSE is normal except them. And if they ever tease or make you feel silly in the locker room, that's just them trying to deal with their own insecurities. Don't worry, kids really will get nicer, and what you'll all find out is that bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and grow and change at different times, and that you're all just fine the way you are. It seems like cold comfort now, just like it seemed to me when I was your age, but don't worry, everything will be okay. :-)

Answer 2

Bless you, I was the same, and couldnt talk to my mum about these things. Luckily my best friend had massive knockers and grew out of her bras and very kindly gave me all her old ones. One was a 34A and I still had it when I was in my 20s... it still fit! It was pink satin and lace and did up at the front. It was my treasure!

My two daughters are 14 and 12 and obsessed with bras my 12 year old is like you and just budding but we went out and bought a load of 28aa bra;s for her with some padding so she feels like she has some boobs. Also when you are budding you dont want your nips showing under your tops so it is good to get a little bra to cover up.

I would speak to your mum and I am sure she will be only too happy to take you bra shopping. Maybe you could put a tight tshirt on and say you feel uncomfortable because people can see through it. She will get the hint!

Good luck sweet heart :o)

Answer 3

Awww poor thing! I'm 22 years old and mine are still so small! I'm almost a 34 A! lol. I wore these sports bra like things through most of middle school. I was too small for a bra but still needed a lil sumthin. I HATE wearing bras so everything worked out good for me. I wear sports bras ALL the time to school, and everywhere really. But if I'm gettin dressed up I'll throw a bra on. I think sports bras are way more comfortable personally. But that could be because I'm in between sizes and cant find that perfect bra. I enjoy being "small". Whenever I'm in my 30's or 40's (or whenever gravity takes hold and the girls begin to sag..) mine will still be perky!! (Unless I have babies and they just grow like CrAzy!!!!) lol anyway. Embrace the size you are. There's MANY benefits to having a small chest!! =]

Answer 4

If you tell your mom that you want a bra then she should understand, she is a girl. I got my first bra when i was like 10. I didnt need it I just felt special having one. Or maybe if you tell her you need some money and have her drop you off at a store with your cousin you can go buy one and you wont have to tell anyone. Lots of girls dont have large breasts then, I didnt have like ANY untill I was 16 then boom they just started to grow, I never thought they would lol....but dont worry one of my friends is 22 and still has no boobs..like none, they dont even have a bra size for her but no one looks at her weird, you kinda get used to the fact that people have different bodies and in the end smaller breasts are way cuter and girls with big ones are usually jealous cause then when your older they stay perky and you can wear tank tops and tube tops w/o a bra! EVERYONE goes through the awkward stage, whether they feel their boobs are too big and they want to hide them or too small. I got made fun of but I just learned to blow it off. Guys and Gals are jerks anyways no matter what your size!!

Answer 5

Poor thing. That's how I was and then in ninth grade it all got better for me. Anyway, my first bra story ... well I was wearing this tight shirt and my mom said "You really should wear a bra with that." Then, I gave her a look, because she had not bought me any and I did not have any and then she was like, "Honey, go change, we're going shopping." Then we did. It was embarassing. Lol. I like to go bra shopping alone. And whoever said that people don't talk about bra shopping, they're liars. My friends and I do all the time.

Answer 6

Just talk to your mom about it. Or ask her if you can get a training bra because your nipples are showing through your shirt.

Ignore those who pick on your breast size, they are NOT your friends if they can't knock off the teasing. Your breasts are perfect the way they are.

And not everybody is filled out by 8th grade. There are beautiful women everywhere that have small breasts, just look at fashion magazines!

LOVE your body.

Answer 7

Just tell your mom you want some bras! Tell her that it is needed so no matter what size you are. She will understand. You have to want them. Tell her what you told us! do not worry for every person grows at different rates. but it really is a nice feeling to fit in with a bra on!
I remember guys running their finger down my back to see if they felt the bra straps... so I know what you are dealing with. Do not be shy with your mom, as these days you will need her expertise more! she will actually feel proud to share and help you pick one out. some are lightly padded which may help you to hold your head high and the 'chatter" will go away.

Answer 8

Hi

Take a moment to talk to your mom alone - no brother around anywhere.

Explain that you are developing and feel it is time to get a training bra or sports bra.

Explain that you are uncomfortable bearing yourself in front of other girls because you are going through some changes.

By the sounds of it, I suspect you will be seeing some bigger differences in your chest over the next few months.

Welcome to womanhood!

Good luck

Answer 9

you definitely need a bra, no matter what size you are. even if its just a training bra or a sports bra. if not, youll be able to see the outline of your boobs through your shirt. but its nothing to be embarassed about. i dont know why boys have some facination about big chested girls. its just extra fat on your chest. youll probably actually be better off in the end without big boobs. its just your body type and nothing to be ashamed of. lots of people dont go through these growths until their later teens too, so be patient. it could happen. just tell your mom that you would feel comfortable with a bra and explain to her why. she should understand. if not, ask another family member or friends mom that you are comfortable with.

Answer 10

You need to wear a bra just for being in the locker room and changing. I was very small until I had kids-believe me smaller is better!