Ugh, my dad and i usta be pretty close, he tells me he loves me, that im his princess all that other jazz, but its mostly threw text message.
My parents are divorced and i never see him anymore, we always make plans to do stuff but he is busy w/ work alot, he outta town or in town but still has to work.
He has agreed to see me 3 weeks in a row but he keeps canceling, we were going to tomorrow and he was gonna pick me up at one, i just text him saying "i cant wait to see you tomorrow" and he says "i cant" i replyed "why" and he hasent texted me back, i tried calling but no answer.
He tells me he loves me but now i dont know if i believe him.
2007-08-30 16:12:31 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
fyi im 16 and a girl
2007-08-30 16:14:54 · update #1
Your daddy will love you if you use the spell check.
2007-08-30 16:30:47 · answer #1 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can almost completely feel your pain. Ever since my dad left my family almost 5 years ago, I have been trying to deal with the fact that I am no longer close with my dad. Whats worse is that he doesn't even recognize that he has totally ignored me for like the past 3 years in favor of his new wife and stepsons. So i can completely understand why you doubt him saying he loves you...BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN HE DOESN'T. He will always love you but doesn't always show it.
Right now, unfortunately for you, your dad is probably going through a lot right now, and although you may not deserve his lack of attention, it might be something that you will have to deal with for a long time. But be sure to let him know how you feel, and make sure you ask him how he feels...tell him to explain it to the best of his ability to you because you really need to know.
Once you have more knowledge....it helps you take whatever step you need to next.
I really hope i helped and I am so sorry to hear of your circumstances...unfortunately people in our situations are only becoming more frequent.
2007-08-30 16:45:20 · answer #2 · answered by Chael G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, parents have a big impact on our development of self-esteem, fortunately, we can have a little control over that. You wouldn't keep a friend or boyfriend in your life that would continuously hurt you, why allow your father to do that? I have a cousin whose father flat out told her he wanted nothing to do with her and she is one of the most amazing people I know. Smart, successful, happy - simply amazing. She didn't need him, and never dwelled on the fact that he was a piece of ****. Don't allow *anyone* to hurt you because they are a lesser person. Remember, its not YOU he doesnt care about. He hurt your mom too and I would be willing to bet that your mom and you are not the first and will not be the last people your father hurts. He has the issues to deal with, not you.
2016-05-17 13:32:26 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apparently you missed the part where "kids don't need dads". It's a famous ideology from the feminists of the 70's 80's and even today.Your dad was well versed in it, because of what he's not doing for you now.
I have daughters your age, and when they were little I often thought.."they won't even want me around when they're teens", boy was I wrong. Daughters need good dads no matter what age. The reasons for what they need from both parents change as they get older. For instance, just telling my daughters I have faith in them, that they can do tasks they think are too hard, makes them try harder. Sometimes it pisses them off, but they appreciate it later. Their mom is "a mom" and she tends to love them, in a mom way. I love them in a dad way. I push them to their potential..teach them to parallel park, how to spit, (they're pretty good for prissy girls) and how to drive a 5 speed. My 18 y/o is on her way to become an airline pilot. How cool is that?
My daughters have it the opposite of you. They find ways of not hanging out with me, because I like to hike and ride bikes..for MILES, so they make excuses, however I NEVER fail to ask them to go along. Sometimes they even surprise me by going. This summer we did a father/daughter road trip, that turned out great despite my concerns.
It looks like you're going to have to initiate all the contact with your dad, but don't let it discourgage you. He'll come around , it doesn't sound like he and your mom raised a wimp. So keep trying.
2007-08-30 16:29:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
How sad for you. I love my 16-year-old daughter more than life itself. But being a dad who works a lot, I know it's easy for time to fill up. Here's something: Have him make an appointment with you like he would for business. Sometimes dads have to think that way to make time for their families. He loves you, I'm sure. Make him see that time with him is something you need too. Best of luck to you both.
2007-08-30 16:20:27 · answer #5 · answered by David W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's your dad, and if he says he loves you, he most likely means it. It is wrong of him to make plans, and get your hopes up just to crush them later. Maybe you should try calling again, or try a different number, like if you called his cell, try his house phone. You did say that he works a lot, so maybe something came up to do with that. Just explain to him that it hurts you when he makes plans with you and then breaks them. Then maybe he'll make a greater effort to actually come and visit you and come through with the plans.
2007-08-30 16:29:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont ever believe that your dad stop caring. He has more to worry about now that he cant see what you wear to school what boy is calling you who you pick for friends and who you may pick for boyfriend. His Love for you could go threw solid steel dont never believe he has stop caring for you, never believe that. What ever the reason he left your mother has nothing to do with his love for you.////
2007-08-30 16:21:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i very sorry to hear that this is happening to you. i am 35 yrs old and my mom died 21 yrs ago . my dad gave me a choice to either come and live with him & my step mom or live with my grandparents....i lived with my grandparents for several yrs. before my mom died my dad would say that he would pick me up on the weekend..then the weekend he would call & give my mom a excuse that he couldn't make it. i love my dad very much but for yrs i didn't feel he felt the same way. somehow you need to talk to him & explain to him how important he is to you & that you need to spend time together. hopefully he will really listen to you & make the time for you & him.
2007-08-30 17:01:57 · answer #8 · answered by confused angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, that really has to hurt. Have you tried actually talking to him instead of texting him. The emotion that can be conveyed in conversation is often lost in type.
2007-08-30 16:20:12 · answer #9 · answered by db2437 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HEY, UR DAD LOVES U..
parents do stupid things like kids do....
don't plan ur life around him... let him plan his life around u...
you are experiencing how men can break ur heart... so don't go falling in love or turning to a b/f bcuz of ur dad... he will break ur heart tooo...
these hard hard years... just go do ur own thing... I am sure u love ur dad too....
2007-08-30 16:30:09 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋