I met my wife 10yrs ago. She is 44 i am 36. She has a 24 yr old daughter 2yr old granddaughter. She has been married twice before this is my first. When we met she was living in a basement appartment working 3 jobs. We promised each other many things when we got engaged. She was going to quit smoking, she wanted more kids, I transfered my job from the city to the country area, which i didn't wont. Anyway now she has quit all her jobs, still smokes, and isn't interested in sex unless I beg. She stays home and finds things to complain about. I work shift work 12-18hr days. On my day off after nights I usually sleep in till noon. Lately i am acused of being lazy all i do is lay around watching tv"". I am the one that worked 89hrs last week. We purchased a cottage and a second rental house and goto carribean each winter. I know these things sound materialistic but how am I lazy? Its almost like I am only around to give he a better life than she had. DOES SHE LOVE ME OR $$
2007-08-30 04:53:42 · 9 answers · asked by oppy911 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dude, your only 36 and no kids together? Get the F out of there.
Go start a new life, find a younger woman and start a family. You are obviously not happy and you don't respect her, and it's only going to get worse.
Aren't you packing yet?
2007-08-30 05:02:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have asked yourself this question 10 years ago. Sorry. Bottom line, you chose this life (no one forced you to say "I do"). It's not fair to the the kids or to your wife. Try doing some couples counseling and see if you can work through it. Think about all the time and energy you have put in over the past 10 years? Really worth throwing all that away if it's fixable?
2016-04-02 07:23:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she loves your money. I would open a separate account for just you and put her on a budget. If she wants more she can get a job and start pulling her own weight. Marriage is a partnership, but she seems to be treating it like a dictatorship.
2007-08-30 06:25:26 · answer #3 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to remind this woman of her promises and tell her that you will sleep and lay around as much as you like. If she doesn't like it, she can leave. You already know it's your money she loves; so you'll have to decide if that's enough for you. If it's not, tell her to get up off her duff and get a job; so she can help support herself. And if she won't sleep with you, get rid of her selfish butt!
2007-08-30 05:27:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds as if married you for the money and support of her kid and granddaughter, actions speak louder than words, so theirs no reason to sit down and talk to her , she a woman and only going to lie to you. i, myself would not support a stay at home wife, let alone put up with the smoking and smell, i'd be gone.
2007-08-30 05:25:49 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't sound good. You need to have a talk with her and tell what you're expectations are 1) for how you want to be treated and 2) changed you would like for her to make.
Working 89 hours a week while someone else doesn't contribute (and doesn't appreciate what their partner is doing for them) isn't fair.
2007-08-30 05:02:35 · answer #6 · answered by rebelyellniki 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she didn't love you I don't think she would be with you. No amount of money is going to me stay with someone I don't love. How much time do you spend with her each day? I mean real quality one on one time. I don't just mean sex, I mean interacting, conversation, stuff like that. Sounds like she wants attention.
2007-08-30 05:02:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She sounds bored. Have her find something to do during the day. Job, volunteer, anything...classes. She has lost herself....help her get back on her feet.
2007-08-30 05:02:42 · answer #8 · answered by Rein 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You might begin by some self-examination.
If you want to learn about the subject without having to sort through a lot of anonymous answers by strangers, about whom you know nothing, including whether they know anything, there's a way to learn.
The reading list below can act as a source for you. Most of the titles can be found in your local library. If they don't have them they can borrow them from another library.
Boundaries-Relationships-Charles-Whitfield
http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-Relationships-Charles-Whitfield/dp/155874259X/ref=sr_1_1/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188488699&sr=1-1
Boundaries-Marriage-Workbook-Henry-Cloud
http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-Marriage-Workbook-Henry-Cloud/dp/0310228751/ref=sr_1_4/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188488699&sr=1-4
Boundaries-Workbook-Dr-Henry-Cloud
http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-Workbook-Dr-Henry-Cloud/dp/0310494818/ref=sr_1_6/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188488699&sr=1-6
Parents-Teens-Boundaries-Draw-Line
http://www.amazon.com/Parents-Teens-Boundaries-Draw-Line/dp/1558742794/ref=sr_1_7/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188488699&sr=1-7
Setting-Limits-Your-Strong-Willed-Child
http://www.amazon.com/Setting-Limits-Your-Strong-Willed-Child/dp/0761521364/ref=sr_1_12/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188488699&sr=1-12
Addiction-Love-Overcoming-Dependency-Relationships
http://www.amazon.com/Addiction-Love-Overcoming-Dependency-Relationships/dp/1587612399/ref=sr_1_1/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489018&sr=1-1
Verderber-Verderbers-Inter-Act-Interpersonal-Communication
http://www.amazon.com/Verderber-Verderbers-Inter-Act-Interpersonal-Communication/dp/0195169107/ref=sr_1_7/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489018&sr=1-7
Addicted-Love-Recovering-Dependencies-Relationships
http://www.amazon.com/Addicted-Love-Recovering-Dependencies-Relationships/dp/0892836997/ref=sr_1_2/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489204&sr=1-2
Counter-dependency-Janae-Weinhold-Ph-Barry
http://www.amazon.com/Counter-dependency-Janae-Weinhold-Ph-Barry/dp/1412012899/ref=sr_1_3/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489204&sr=1-3
Co-dependency-Breaking-Entangled-Relationships-Serendipity
http://www.amazon.com/Co-dependency-Breaking-Entangled-Relationships-Serendipity/dp/B000UO9LFG/ref=sr_1_4/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489204&sr=1-4
Stupid-Things-Couples-Their-Relationships
http://www.amazon.com/Stupid-Things-Couples-Their-Relationships/dp/0060512601/ref=sr_1_5/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489204&sr=1-5
Yourself-Abusive-Relationship-Richard-Kraus
http://www.amazon.com/Yourself-Abusive-Relationship-Richard-Kraus/dp/0897932579/ref=sr_1_8/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489204&sr=1-8
Codependent-No-More-How to Quit Controlling Others and Start Caring For Yourself
http://www.amazon.com/Codependent-No-More-Controlling-Yourself/dp/0894864025/ref=sr_1_9/002-3352010-2594421?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188489204&sr=1-9
2007-08-30 05:05:28 · answer #9 · answered by Jack P 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋