advice about a new friend i just met and what she did to me last nite? i have 2 small kids. over the summer?

Question

i met another woman, 2 kids at park/indoor play area. we became friends, exchanged numbers, meet at parks etc with our kids. yesterday she called to meet at mcdonalds play area. i went. brought one child cuz my other kid stayed and slept over her friends. i met her there with her 2 kids and one of mine. an employee and mcdonalds finished her shift and came over to talk to my new friend. it seemed like they already knew each other. my friend told me she was gonna walk her out (emloyee friend) to her car and would probably have a quick smoke and be rite back. i said "fine, no problem". well, she must have been gone for at least an hour leaving me not only to watch my son, who is only 4 and her 2 kids. i was so mad, i left with my son. when she saw me leave, she and friend ended talk quickly. she asked me where i was going. i told her i was leaving. she apolized. she called me later that nite about 4 times saying sorry. never answer her calls. what should i do. thanks

Answer 1

She's using you and you barely know her. It is not normal to treat someone you barely know like that.

Don't be friends with her.

Answer 2

What she did was rude, there's no doubt about it. To leave to make conversation with someone else while you watch her kids is very nervy. I'd be pissed as well if it happened to me. If you like being friends with this woman and don't mind her kids, then call her back. Explain that you felt you were being taken advantage of and that is not the kind of friendship you are looking for. If she values the new friendship, she will not do it again. But if it does happen again, I would end the friendship, no questions asked. PS - make sure playdates are at a different McDonald's so there is no chance of her pulling that again.

Answer 3

Has she done anything like that before? She might have gotten caught up in the conversation and not realized how long she had been out there. If she is normally a self centered person I would just avoid her and she will get the hint. If this is out of character then I would talk to her and tell her you just felt like she ditched you so she could talk with her friend and you could watch her kids... and she was the one that invited you. If she said she was sorry she probably was.

Answer 4

First of all, after about 15 minutes and she hadn't returned you should have taken all the children out with you to speak with her - without anger, as in join in the conversation. Your new friend would have got the message.

She probably lost track of the time and that is giving her the benefit of the doubt. She apologised and obviously felt badly about what happened.

then you compounded the problem by not answering the phone when she called. it could have been sorted out if you had answered the phone the first time and spoken to her.



It would have been better for both of you if you had held onto your temper at the outset, gone outside with the children after about 15 minutes and joined in the conversation or after she called the first time, picked up the phone and explained how you felt to her.

However....you could think about phoning her to tell her that you were troubled by being left for nearly an hour while she talked to someone else (it was rude, there is no getting around it - something you do not need to spell out to her as she is aware that she was rude) and apologise for not answering the phone when she called.

No one is perfect and now because of your reaction, you may have lost a friend who because she is a single parent, would have welcomed a non-judgemental friend in the same situation.

Be a friend. Forgive and forget. Try again. Friends, real friends are hard to come by.

Answer 5

Well, if you like this woman and want to continue to be friends with her, I would say call her back and tell her how you feel. She seems pretty remorseful, but it is possible that this is just what she does, being that you don't know her very well.

If you decide to stay friends with her and she does it again or something similar, or just something as rude, end it. I am sure you can find plenty of other friends.

Answer 6

With a friend like her, who needs an enemy? I would call her and tell her how I feel, that it was rude of her to leave you with her kids that long. Tell her you felt like she was using you as a
babysitter while she spent time with her friend. Tell her you will not tolerate this in the future, if your friendship is to be pursued. If you do something with her again, and she says she is going outside to smoke, send her children with her. That should show her you are not a doormat!

Answer 7

Personally I would be upset too. For a person to leave you hanging for so long shows absolutely no respect for you or your time! Also what kind of mother leaves her kids with a complete stranger?

I used to have a friend that did this to me all the time. She would constantly be late, be disrespectful of my time(Which is precious because at the time I too was a single mom.), and I decided that I couldn't handle this level of disrespect. n the other hand, she was also a good friend and had been through many ups and downs with me through the years.

So the question is....is she worth it to you?

Answer 8

I think you should accept her apologies but make it clear to her that you did not appreciate what she did. Personally, I would not talk back to someone who would do me like that because that shows me that she only sees me as a babysitter and someone that is going to bow down to her and wait on her while she does whatever it is she wants to do. That's was so disrespectful and was definitely an ill decision made by her. She should feel bad for what she did. You are not her employee and you did not seek out this meeting between the two of you; she did! Give her the boot.

Answer 9

With 2 kids your life shouldn't be empty.This person seems to want a baby sitter than she wants a friend.Cut it off now before her rude and selfish nature gets the best of the relationship later.

Answer 10

There is no reason for being so rude. Answer her call, and let her blow hot air so she'll stop trying. Then tell her not to call you again.

Do you really want to be involved with a woman who is thoughtless enough to leave you sitting there with her kids and irresponsible enough to forget that her kids are there?

Answer 11

I would confront her and tell her that it was very rude and that you felt set up. Ask her who the other person was and what she was doing. Tell her that if it happens again, you will indefinitely end your friendship with her. But I would give her a chance to redeem herself. Just cool off and then give her a call back.