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My husband who is 32 drinks a minimum of a 6 pack of beer but normally up to a 12 pack every single night! He starts when he gets home from work and doesn't stop til he goes to bed. Is he an alcoholic? He says it's not hurting anything or me so I should mind my own business. It seems concerning to me. Why do people drink that much??

2007-08-30 02:40:56 · 24 answers · asked by Stacy C 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

I guess my biggest concern is WHAT IS HE TRYING NOT TO DEAL WITH? He obvioulsy wants to drown out life - I wonder what the real issue is. I have asked him and really get no answers. He has been this way for almost 9 years.

2007-08-30 02:53:50 · update #1

24 answers

If it is in fact hurting your relationship or his work habits then it is a problem regardless of what he says. There are functioning alcoholics that drink but can carry on with their day normally. But the main thing to look for...can he stop? When he starts can he not stop or are there times when he can put it down without a problem? Does he plan his day around it?

People that can control it. Stop whenever needed or they want, display some self control, and are able to maintain relationships are NOT alcoholics. If he is planning his evenings around it, craving it, thinking about it, and hurting his relationships, etc. Then he does have a problem.

People without restraint are the ones to worry about.

2007-08-30 02:49:36 · answer #1 · answered by acatisacomintogetcha 2 · 0 0

No, you should not mind your own business! You are married to this man! That gives you the right to an opinion and to be concerned. You love him and don't want to see anything bad happen to him. You need to make him understand that you are not nagging him, but are concerned for his well being.

Sit down and talk and ask him to moderate his drinking. I don't want to say 'If he loves you he will' cause I don't believe that. I think that drug addicts and alcoholism is truly a disease and sometimes it takes the person completely over. However, I do believe that if he cares to keep what he has, he will have to do something. It might be really hard and you may hit a lot of bumps along the way, but he will keep going if he wants to change for you And for himself, which I think is the most important thing.

He needs to want to change himself. If he doesn't want to, then the decisions you have to make may end up being a little harder in the end.

2007-08-30 02:52:26 · answer #2 · answered by Kia R 2 · 0 0

Most people DON'T drink that much. Anything over 2 alchoholic drinks per sitting is considered a binge....binging every day constitutes alchoholism. He may not be a bad or violent drunk, but it is not healthy for him either way, physically or emotionally. Have you tried speaking to him about his drinking habits? If not, that is the first step. If he doesn't respond, call some treatment facilities in your area to check out some other options. These things can get much worse if not nipped immediately.

2007-08-30 02:46:45 · answer #3 · answered by Rachel-Pit Police-DSMG 6 · 0 0

nicely, that isn't any longer unusual for somebody to have a tumbler of wine with dinner each evening, yet to drink 3 glasses daily after paintings means that it extremely is extra a habit than a remarkable flavor with nutrition. That he liquids so plenty extra on weekends could advise he has lost, or is dropping, administration of his ingesting. you are able to desire to insist that he supply up ingesting to get buzzed. My wager is that he will face as much as and say he does not have a situation, which means you have a situation. If he refuses to supply up or cut back returned, come to a decision to an area rehab health center or Alcoholics nameless to ask for professional suggestion. If he's an alcoholic, I wish you nicely, yet you're in for some confusing circumstances forward.

2016-10-03 10:03:08 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Im completely with you on this one, it seems like he is trying to AVOID life and feeling anything by drinking and self medicating himself so he just doesnt care whats going on around him. He could very well be an alcoholic by now but Im going to say he is unhappy about something- something is really bothering him alot and he doesnt want to think about it or worry about it- he doesnt want to FEEL anything at all so he drinks until he forgets and just doesnt care anymore. Sit with him when he first gets home- before the beer- and pour your heart out to him. Tell him how much u love him and you are always there for him no matter what. Beg him to open up and talk to you. Let him know u cant stand much more of the drinking and silence. Marriage is a partnership!!!! If he loves u he will do his best to stop the drinking. If he doesnt than I would say his drinking means more to him than his family does. Im so sad for you. I know this is very hard and very confusing for you. Please atleast try to talk to him and get him to open up to you. Dont yell or holler at him just try to get him to open up with words of love. This is your business- he is your husband and its your home too!

2007-08-30 04:09:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Sounds to me that he has some serious emotional issues. If he has been this way for 9 years what took you so long for it to start bothering you. It seems to me after 9 years she is probably set in his ways and this is a hard to break habit. IT seems as if he has adopted it as his normal routine. Nonetheless, you have every right to be worried about his behavior because that is not good. I think he is dealing with some real issues.

2007-08-30 04:05:48 · answer #6 · answered by Sexysass 2 · 0 0

When my husband gets home from work the first 3 tinnies dont even touch the sides going down,then he gets into some serious drinking.He goes to work 6 days a week,then when he gets his time off he does his chores around home then goes and helps family or friends.As long as he is happy and healthy why on earth would I try and stop him,if I asked him to slow down he would.I know it and so does he.

2007-08-30 02:59:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I have the same problem. My boyfriend comes home with 3-4 Fosters oil cans which is 32oz of beer per can everynight. I hate it. I want him to realize what he is doing to his body. He always says I am not drinking to get drunk I just like the taste of beer. I think he is an alcoholic. If you drink everyday thats a problem. I did talk to my doctor about it and she said that is a ridiculous amount of alcohol to be drinking everyday. She also told me not to "nag" him about it because that will make him want to keep doing it. She told me not to make it my problem. She also said if I wanted to say anything to him about it make it positive like I trust your judgement, I know you will calm down on the drinking soon. I haven't tried that yet. I just don't say anything anymore. If he wants to destroy his body thats his business. It's very hard to do this because I love him to death but he doesnt listen so what else can you do?

2007-08-30 02:52:31 · answer #8 · answered by Nicole * 2 · 0 0

Give him an ultimatum. Either its the alcohol or me! Its fine to have a couple when he gets home from work but 6-12 daily is too much, if its not a problem now it will be.

2007-08-30 02:49:52 · answer #9 · answered by Maria 5 · 0 0

he's what is called a "functioning alcoholic"...goes to work, comes home and drinks... =(... yes, it hurts you, because you will never have the relationship a married couple is supposed to have because of the drinking! =(... he is emotionally unavailable, is giving himself to the beer... =(... and that hurts! give him an ultimatum, you, or the beer, and mean it... leave if he does not stop...that will show how much he really cares about you if he keeps drinking...good luck! =) he drinks that much because he does not want to deal w/ every day matters that are important!

2007-08-30 02:46:26 · answer #10 · answered by elvlayarvvi fEisty wife and mom 6 · 0 0

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