I have a personal question and I would like some REAL advice?

Question

First of all, please don't be harsh. I really want change in my life and I need direction. I have a lot of pent up emotion from my past. I do NOT want to live in the past any longer, but it has so affected me. Now I have these fits of anger. I have knee jerk reactions. I lash out, I break things, I say things that I can't take back. I have always been one to speak my mind, but it's getting pretty bad. I'm not saying that the person I act out towards the most doesn't deserve to change also, but I realize that I can't change them. I need to change myself and I don't know how. I have deep rooted anger and it scares me. I'm beginning to have mean thoughts and bad dreams where I hurt people. I'm really upset and afraid. I feel like I'm in a tornado; I'm twisting in all directions and can't seem to get control back.

Can anyone give me some real advice and/or tips for becoming a better person? I think it has to go past 'wanting it badly enough.' I've wanted it for years with no results.

Answer 1

My friend, I too have a lifelong anger problem. The rages would scare everyone, I have broken things and relationships. I hated the wall around me and the fear in others eyes when I lost control. Seek a counselor who specializes in working through anger. Skills not pills!!!! No joke. I have been helped tremendously. If you cant gain access to a counselor for whatever reason, there are books and groups. Check out the local hospital for a group, you will feel so much better. Forgive the ones who hurt you so long ago and forgive yourself for letting them hurt you still. Anger is an all consumeing thing and I hope you get some help, I feel so much better, I dont hate myself anymore, keep trying!!!!!! If my anger and rage can be quelled so can yours!!!!! Anger cant be controlled, only understood, you need to understand where it is comeing from and recognize its signals when it is coming on so that you can diffuse it or understand why you are angry. When I feel the blackness of my rage coming on I step back from it, try to pinpoint WHY and the reality that what ever has upset me is probably not worth the anger or its consequences...I feel for you and hope you dont spend a long life wrapped in rage like I did. Skills not pills!!!

You are not a bad person because you have anger. Everyone gets angry, you and I just get too angry. You are not less of a person, and it is not fixable on your own. I know for true! It is hard to not think of yourself as a bad person when your anger has hurt others. YOU would not do those things if your anger was not so out of hand, right? I had to ask a lot of people for forgiveness and many are still suprised when I let something go that would have caused all kind of rage just a couple years ago...

You can do it...I know....I'm living proof!

GOOD LUCK!!!!!

Answer 2

YOU MUST GO TO A SHELTER IMMEDIATELY!!!!! Do no longer hesitate. He will kill you and the youngsters if what you're announcing approximately him is as critical because it sounds. There are ladies's refuge's to visit which will can help you and your kids keep there and be trustworthy. You can discover a task even as you're there and they are able to present a few counseling. This is an excessively critical concern. Your kids are a worthy present from God and must have the steadiness of a loving residence so as to develop as much as be well folks. This is so unfair for them. They didn't ask for any of this. Please go away him as quickly as you'll. Take a few garments, one of the most youngsters such a lot worthy matters and cross! DO NOT inform anybody in which you're. HE WILL NEVER STOP. I recognize this for the reason that of beyond stories. You must stand in your possess 2 ft. Do no longer run to a further guy. Please. Grow up, be given the accountability of being a mother and now deal with what God has given you. YOU are the ones kid's ONLY desire.

Answer 3

You need therapy. Check to see if you have insurance that will pay, but go anyway even if it won't. Otherwise your temper will land you in jail. Good luck to you.

I know because I have carried a lot of anger from things that have happened that I did not deserve, and then later in life things happened to my child that he did not deserve. But there is a way out of the anger and resentment, so that you can join the human race like you DO deserve.
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Answer 4

Have you tried keeping a journal or an online blog where you vent these feelings?

Aerobic exercise--especially running--is great for resolving angry, pent-up feelings (and it also gives you a chance to think).

Finally, therapy is the gold standard. But it's critically important to find a good therapist who you can really develop trust and rapport with.

Answer 5

Please see your family physician and describe the exact symptoms you have here. If you don't have a family doctor then call your local mental health and explain it to them. Their fees run according to what your income is and are usually pretty low. They can and will do you a world of good. If not them, then contact your local Family Services [Social Services]. And, please, do it now before you become any worse !! Good luck and blessings to you - - - -

Answer 6

Welcome to the club... Enjoy your membership!