Is it worth both husband and wife going into the military?

Question

My husband has been in the Army for 5yrs and I want to join. I was wondering how stressful it is on a marriage and if it is worth it. Please only those who are married with both husband and wife in military. (Different branches is fine for an answer.)

Honestly, what are the chances that I will be stationed with my husband. Please no recruiters, I already know what you are going to say.

We have no children. (I wouldn't leave for basic if I had children.) I can do the physical requirements. I really want to serve my country in this way, but not at the risk of my marriage. And yet, I don't want to be 45yrs old and regret not doing it. Wow. Can I make it any more confusing? I'm sure I can try. ;)

Answer 1

hi, I can speak from experiance. I am divorced..and former dual military marriage...IT SUCKS! I don't know about the army but i know in the navy (just think about this if you do have kids in the future) you both have to sign a family care plan...so that in case both of you get deployed you have already designated someone to take care of your kids. YES they do deploy both parents.
second you are going in the army. you will go to iraq. they are still doing long deployments. how long can you do with out your husband and not to mention no beer to kill the pain? (dry country).
if you really love your husband i would have to say no...but if you still have this undying urge to join do it for 2 years. i know there is a 20, 000 dollar bonus for joining but really can you put a price tag on your marriage?
That said it is commendable that you are considering it...but really if you take your marriage first then don't join b/c the army is certainly not going to put your marriage first. my favorite military saying is "needs of the military/mission (navy)" pretty much screw the rest. lol
good luck with either you choose

Answer 2

Myself and my ex-husband both where active duty military. I think it depends on what you have going on in your life. It is really hard if you have small kids, the military does not care that you have kids. Your job comes first before anything. It was hard but we made it work. As for being stationed together, they are not supposed to have you less than 50 miles apart, but that is not always true, but you have a good chance of being stationed together if your MOS is needed on the same post. We both were Army. He is still active and I am in the reserves and I also work at the MEPS station. The only thing that would be hard is if you both were sent to maybe Korea. Many post in Korea are male only so you both would be stationed in Korea but not on the same post. It sounds like you are tired of just being a plain Army wife though, I would give it some serious thought before you do this. I know it is good to have something of your own, but it can be tough at times. Good luck.

Answer 3

ummm i know nothing on the subject but before you even THINK about it know that the requirements are really rough, can you run 2 miles in 12 minutes, go all day with little to no food and still perform at top notch, do u have experiance with firearms. the millitary isn't desperate for recruits anymore like in WWII, that's y there is no draft. if you have any special medical condition asthma, heart problems, anything. it is not possible to join. And maybe you are doing this for romantic reasons to keep togather with your husband, it's really a nice thought, but have you considered what the army puts you through? NOT to menntion there's a HIGH chance that you could not be stationed togather. So please consider what you are doing don't get all phsyced for doing something than have the very idea of it crash down, Have you even talkede to your husband about this?? i assume that would come first, regardless i wish u luck and i hope that your husband will have a safe experiance in the army

Answer 4

No more stressful than it is right now. The Army was always pretty good when I was in about keeping husbands and wives together at the same base (except for deployments like Iraq, which you would have to deal with now).
Given the number of troops getting out and low recruitment, I would imagine they will be trying even harder to keep spouses together.

They won't station you apart, but you could find delays (you get a new duty station at Ft. Sill, but because of his MOS, it takes him 2-4 months to get posted at Sill - creating a short separation).

You could also find yourselves at one base longer than most, as the Army has a hard time posting both of you to the next duty station (so if you hate Fort Richardson Alaska, you might get stuck there longer than you would like as the Army tries to find you both spots someplace else).

Other than that, it isn't much different than if you were working at the local hospital, and he was doing his normal duty on base.

Answer 5

Retired military, 22yrs svc, in charge of 125
soldiers before I got out. 10 married couples
and out of the 10 , 8 had problems with their
marriage. As for being stationed togeather you
would be very lucky as that hardly exists now
with the wars and all, and it would be very stress-
full. Money made would be a plus, but taking a
big risk in your marriage. So it's a decision that
you and your husband would have to think about
before both of you made the move to get into
the military.

Answer 6

Sorry I can't speak from experience, but I've known people in this situation. What happens is they can have trouble getting co-located. Some good friends of ours, Navy surface warfare officers, got married but their detailers would not assign them to the same place. After about two years of waiting, "she" got out and became a stay at home mom.

Answer 7

it is worth it but be prepared to be separated for long periods of time. my nephew and his wife are married with children and both are in the army. be prepared to be stationed at different posts. be prepared for one of you to go overseas for a few months out of the year. their relationship is strong. it can happen but the best thing is for you to ask married coupels who are in the army when both are active duty.

Answer 8

Its ENOUGH stressful when your the spouse..let alone both of you!..good luck

Answer 9

if there are any kids from your marriage then someone has to stay home and take care of them.

Answer 10

not as long as you are stationed together.