My friend has 4 kids, ages 8-16 and last Christmas, i gave them perfume and they liked it. That's when their mom told me i gave them the wrong gifts the other Christmas because i gave them books.
But i sincerely chose those books for them! And when i bought those, i was thinking of trying to get them to include reading in their activities instead of just playing computer games and watching TV, etc.
Is it right to tell a person who gave you a gift that it was a wrong gift? Isn't the thought that counts?
2007-08-29 13:08:48 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I mean, she also gave me gifts i did not like very much, but i wouldn't really tell her that. I guess everyone here got wrong gifts but i guess even in the nicest way, we should never tell someone who gave us a gift that it was a wrong gift. That would still hurt his/her feelings no matter how tactfully you said it.
2007-08-29 13:21:42 · update #1
Your "friend" has some very poor manners.
I would tell her that, as an explanation why you don't care to BE her friend any more.
BTW---I think books are WONDERFUL gifts....especially since SHE doesn't sound like a reader.
Perhaps your last gift to her should be a book of ETIQUETTE!!!!
2007-08-29 13:12:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your 'friend' was wrong.. very wrong and rude. Besides it being the thought that counts.. sounds like she wants whatever u can give her/her kids IF it pleases her. If I were you, I would give the kids a gift card or a card, and explain to the mom only that your gifts seem not to be good enough so you would rather not cause a problem so you will just give gift cards to them or a card only.
2nd Solution: talk to the kids, or find out for yourself what their favorite stores are: by the gift cards for their fav stores....... that way, no problem!!
Your friend really is not a friend.... I would find better if I were u!
2007-08-29 13:13:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time to make new friends. seriously, who says that out loud. You did the right thing by giving them Books. Our kids are already behind in schools.
We have lost the meaning of love. Gifts were the way to show your affection. It is the thought which counted. These days, people have become so dry.
I am so sorry about what you had to hear. Are you sure you want a person like that around you?
2007-08-29 13:13:00 · answer #3 · answered by soniakidman 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This year my daughter is only 6 months, so we have just been putting them out as they come. Next year (or maybe the year after) we will probably wait until Christmas eve so Santa can bring them. We'll keep doing that at least until she's old enough to realize that Santa isn't real, and then we'll play it by ear from there I guess - I was a snoop, and I always ruined my own Christmas and I'd kind of like to spare her that =P I wish my parents had waited until Christmas eve to put the presents under the tree.
2016-05-21 02:57:32 · answer #4 · answered by minna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that was rude and thoughtless of your friend. You are right, "It's the thought that counts". There wasn't a thing wrong with your gifts. If you still want to get the kids something next year, get them a gift card to their favorite store or a card with cash. You can still wrap the envelope in wrapping paper, or buy them a stocking and stuff it with a few of their favorite treats, along with the gift card or cash. This way they can buy what will make their mom happy. How sad.
2007-08-29 13:18:50 · answer #5 · answered by Vida 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The proper way to GIVE a gift is to include either a "gift receipt" or a normal receipt and tell them that they are free to return the gift to the store if they don't like it. This way, the receiver of the give can change their minds, get what they really want without insulting you.
It's also appropriate to ask the parent what sort of gifts the kids would like.
Basically, you created this situation for yourself by not asking what they like and not giving them a polite way to back out.
It's the thought, and the proper execution of the thought that count.
2007-08-29 13:18:34 · answer #6 · answered by Alice Lockwood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a crass and thoughtless thing to say. I can't say a word about your so-called friend without going off on a tirade, so I will just tell you I think your gift selection is thoughtful and appropriate. No, your friend was not right, and I would not consider her a friend. Yes, the thought counts, and she and her kids should be grateful of the fact that you thought of her kids at all . I might give them a pass next year.
2007-08-29 13:15:35 · answer #7 · answered by claudiacake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No I think that mother is terrible insensitive and ungrateful and unappreciative, and if she were my friend, I would tell her just that. I don't care if you only gave them a nickel a piece, it's a gift and deserves more respect and appreciation than that. Like where does she get off? I'm just embarrassed for her. How could anyone even comment on a gift other than to say "thank you". ? I have one last suggestion for this year, get the kids what you want, but give ol'e mommy a stocking with one lump of coal in it. I'm serious.
2007-08-29 13:14:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're absolutely rite! It's the thought that counts, AND, actually your thought was an excellent choice. That was a rude/shallow move on her part. She should be grateful you gave her children gifts. Just wonder about this yr. Maybe a card w/do?! She can't say you gave them the wrong gift!
2007-08-29 13:15:12 · answer #9 · answered by Sue C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is the thought that counts and it was a nice gesture, but she might not have ment it in the way you are taking it.
Her kids are young, and honestly.. they might just not want books for christmas and they just might not have enjoyed it too much. When you got them the perfume, she knew they'd like it, and it was money much better spent.
It's nothing personal, kids don't want books for christmas, she just knows her kids. Atleast she told you now while you got them the good one, rather then last year saying "Why did you get them that??"
But every parent should want their kid to get books and read and to be educated. She should also be grateful the fact that you even went out and spent your money and bought it for them. But maybe she was just thinking on the kids behave on if they liked it or not. Instead of asking us, she's your friend... you should be able to just ask her what she meant.
2007-08-29 13:12:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is VERY wrong for her to tell you you gave her kids "the wrong gifts" It is super considerate of you to even GIVE her kids Christmas presents, which makes it twice as bad that she would criticize you about it! I would just ignore her. If she brings it up again just talk to her about it, and explain why you gave her kids books. Don't be afraid to be pushy/mean. Teach her a lesson! WAKE UP CALL!!!!!
2007-08-29 13:13:39 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋