My wife has gotten so critical of me since her mother moved in with us. I am ready to leave.
2007-08-29 04:29:44 · 16 answers · asked by OceanBlue0910 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Usually their mother wants thing done their way. There is an enormous amount of stress placed on your wife with her mother their. Trying to meet her mother's expections instead of living her life normally. Mother's tend to point out all the flaws with how the children are raised, how the house is kept, how they dress, how they walk, etc.... The only solution would be kick your mother-in-law out. Hang in there. GOOD LUCK!!!!
2007-08-29 05:34:46 · answer #1 · answered by D TRAIN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not good. In laws should not live with a couple, neither be close to them, unless there are strong reasons for it.
I feel your pain and share it. Mine lives around the corner and comes over whenever she wants to command. I have a big respect and more if the person is an elderly, but a month ago was the last drop--so I told my husband, either you talk (I meant converse, without argumentation) to her, or I leave. The things have been almost no sense, without any logical explanation. He did talk and for now she's respecting, but if it happens again I'm out.
Partners feel the pressure from their mothers. They will always measure you for the way they did or the way the ex (man or women) did.
The only advice I can give you is to talk, and have your partner understand that you can't continue like this. She need to let mom know that even if she doesn't approves, she can't step in..unless is an emergency. Relations are hard, and you keep learning on the way...
I wish you the best
2007-08-29 11:42:36 · answer #2 · answered by Izzie My Blueberry Nights 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's taking her stress out on you. And she needs your help, not to have you leave her.
My mother-in-law lived with us for nearly a year, she suffered from Alzheimer's and it was a real strain on our marriage, but I was able to talk to my husband about my concerns. (we both worked and had to leave her alone, when she got bad we had to find alternate housing and it was very hard for us both)
If your mother is healthy, you're wife is probably feeling threatened. It is her home, and she's finding that she doesn't like to share it. Similar things happen when an adult child moves back home.
Solutions? Don't know for sure, but I think you're two women have to come to some kind of agreement, and find a way to share the home, and you...it won't be easy.
2007-08-29 11:37:24 · answer #3 · answered by Wanda K 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So sorry you are having troubles, does mom in law have health problems? Maybe your wife is scared something will happen to mom even if you are helping as much as you can. I know mother-in-laws can be difficult been there done that. You should sit down with your wife and explain you can't take this pressure anymore and come to a compromise with her if you can. Good luck!
2007-08-29 11:38:00 · answer #4 · answered by Dawn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because her mother is probably critical of her. There is a possibility that she doesn't realize it or she doesn't know she's being critical to such an extreme. Sit down and talk to her but make sure you aren't coming off as attacking her mother.
2007-08-29 11:52:40 · answer #5 · answered by Manny 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because she wanted her mom to think you were perfect and now that she lives with you she can see you aren't. Talk with your wife and see what she expects from you and see if it is reasonable. Stop being a baby and wanting to leave just because things got a little tough. Work on your marriage don't walk out on it....
2007-08-29 11:38:07 · answer #6 · answered by kitkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she is just trying to show her mom that she has a good marriage and she is in total control of the relationship ! but you need to talk to youre wife and tell her how you feel about this and maybe this will help she will see how she is treating you ! good luck and dont leave the marriage ! if the talk doesnt help then you need to ask her to tell her mom to leave
2007-08-29 11:38:44 · answer #7 · answered by foxy lady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because she is no longer "the woman of the house". She feels like "the daughter" now instead of "the wife", and she resents it.
If she was raised to respect her parents, it's easier to take it out on you, than to take it out on her mother.
Ask yourself how you would feel if your father moved in, and took over the role of head-of-the-household. You would feel like less of a man.
It's even worse for women.
2007-08-29 11:54:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe your wife doesn't like the living arrangements, and doesn't really want her mother there... maybe she's under stress.... and so she is acting like a fool, instead of facing this?
i don't know, i don't live there... but maybe it's time you and your wife had a talk... apparently, since you allow this sort of behavior from your wife, you don't communicate well...
never too late to change.
2007-08-29 11:38:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because now that her mother lives with you guys she wants her mom to think that you guys have the perfect marriage to avoid critisim from her mother.
2007-08-29 11:34:06 · answer #10 · answered by Torey♥ 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋