do u think I should tell him to stop as a friend...?????
2007-08-29 03:59:23 · 18 answers · asked by back2future 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he knows what he is doing is wrong, otherwise he wouldn't have to lie and cover it up. you don't need to tell him to stop, he already knows that he should.
you probably shouldn't get involved. i know a lot of people will tell you to tell the wife, but i wouldn't. she may already have suspicions (most wives do in this circumstance). if she doesn't know, she will resent you and will probably doubt you. so, unless you are prepared to present her with concrete evidence (photos, phone msgs, hotel receipts, etc), then keep your mouth shut.
you can tell your friend how you feel, but don't expect to change him. you can't control other people, only yourself.
2007-08-29 04:06:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is definitely not ready for a serious commitment to another person. For the safety of her health the partner needs to know. Are there children involved? If not now is the time to end it before there are. Telling him to stop won't do any good but you could engineer a way for the wife to find out. What happens after the cat is out of the bag is not up to you. She may leave she may stay but at least she will be making an informed choice. You didn't say is this woman your friend as well?
2007-08-29 11:16:19 · answer #2 · answered by Wolfen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is kind of none of your business. I think that if anything, as a friend you should ask him if he TRULY loves his wife. And if so, remind him that if she were to find out......how much it would really hurt her. Then ask him if he is really willing to hurt someone he is 'supposed' to love. If it's no big deal to him, then unfortunately he really wasn't ready for marriage or commitment and his wife is in for a very hard and bumpy road as his mate.
But again, it's not your place, and involving yourself any deeper than that may cause him to turn on you and be very rude about it. Besides, if he doesn't get it together and stop, it will catch up with him, and he will pay the price eventually.
2007-08-29 11:06:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to keep his wife I would talk him into geting some counseling to find out what his problem is. I would be concerned about my friend catching an std and make my friend realize that he is playing very dangerously with his life and that of his wife. You sound like a good person with some morals and seem to care about your friends. You take care and have a great day.
2007-08-29 11:11:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why all of a sudden care?
He's a cheat. If you tell him to stop, he'll more than likely do it more! If that's possible.
Go ahead and voice your opinion if your a friend. But a good friend would of spoke up in the beginning.
2007-08-29 11:08:21 · answer #5 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF you are doing it with the right motive in mind...
YES
Even if he doesn't listen, you have taken a stand for what is right and moral.
Now if you are thinking about telling him because you are interested in his wife...
I would tread softly. If the marriage was to end, it needs to end on it's own, not by outside interference because of a romantic interest.
2007-08-29 12:01:14 · answer #6 · answered by Hillbillee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will always cheat and he chose her because he can get away with it. You can mention it to him that it bothers you to see him mistreat his wife and that he should think about the consequences of the affairs. Ask him is it worth losing his wife? dealing with the issues of trust and then her resentment toward him which paranoia sets in everytime he leaves to go to the gas station or store and she thinks he's out cheating. Maybe that will bring it in to perspective for him.
2007-08-29 11:06:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he would be in line for the "Bill Clinton" award.
Hey, there's an idea. Get him a plaque that says "Bill Clinton Award". I think he'll get the message. Think there's a good chance his wife will too!
And if you know some of the dates, have those engraved also.
2007-08-29 11:15:26 · answer #8 · answered by ahnikarose 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you would be doing the wife a favor. If you have morals, and are a good friend, you should point out that he is wrong.
2007-08-29 11:04:33 · answer #9 · answered by Brandi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though everyone will probably not agree, maybe you should tell her and let her make the choice. Tell her anonamously if you don't want to get stuck in the middle, but she has a right to know and deal with it accordingly
2007-08-29 11:09:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋