in 16 ever scince i was 8 ive pretended to be a boy i look like a boy i dress like a boy i pla boyish sports and have a boyish lifestyle. my mum doesnt mind but my dad doesnt look at me any more . i even have girlfriend and we have been going out for 3 years. everythings going great but yesterday she put her hand down my trousers and instantly took them out she ran out the house. what should i do.? i love her so much and she does me. after all she fell in lov with me not my gender.
2007-08-29 01:53:06 · 8 answers · asked by Emmie 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
To truly be in love with someone, you must be truthful with them and they must be truthful with you.
You may love her, but you needed to be truthful to her in order for her to really fall in love with you.
Hopefully, you can sit down with her and explain why it is you enjoy dressing and being a boy (is it to the point that you need and desire a sex change? something to think about for the future) and apologize for keeping it from her.
That's really all you can do. If you truly have built a solid relationship, maybe she'll be able to forgive you -- even part-way so you can at least try to be friends.
But, since the truth is out now, you got some explaining to do.
And, keep in mind that you don't have to defend why you're doing what you're doing. It makes you feel better about yourself and it's not harming anyone. Good for you.
But, some people (like dad) just can't accept it.
Fortunately, there will be others who can.
You're 16 and if this situation leads to a broken heart, it may be your first, but it wont' be your last. And, things will get better.
2007-08-29 02:27:51 · answer #1 · answered by Schmitty V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's a tough one. I mean, i kind of understand your situation, like maybe you're confused about your identity, maybe transgendered,and yes it's true that she did fall in love with YOU, not your gender, and i believe that's the way it should be. But,unfortunately,though, that's not the way it is. Maybe she's not into girls like that. And even more, you did kind of pretend to be someone else and therefore,unintentionally,lied to her for 3 years, so maybe she feels deceived,maybe she has trouble trusting you anymore because if you could hide something like that,how could she possibly know what else you could be hiding? Maybe she feels completely led on and wonders if your feelings were even real at all. I think the best thing you could do is just try to talk to her,though. Tell her that you're not the person she thought you were physically, but you're the same person emotionally and your feelings are real and you never meant to deceive her or lead her on. Afterall, if you want to continue any kind of relationship with her, you need to be straight up with her because honesty should be the foundation of any healthy relationship. Unfortunately, unless she's Lesbian/Bisexual, there may not be a way to save your actual relationship, but if you come clean with her and do have feelings for her and she still has feelings for you and can understand and forgive you,hopefully,you could at least stay close friends.because it would be sad for 3 years to come down to nothing.
2007-08-29 02:50:59 · answer #2 · answered by Miss Understood 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im sorry to laught lol but wouldnt anyone notice a voice change in puberty( I would most definitly) at the age of 16 because at the age boys voice is deep already and puberty is very noticeable. I hope she love you that way she will come back if not shame on her for not liking a lil bit of the clit clit. lol honey good luck and i wish you the best luck on that. Remember you better than that because their more fish in the sea.
2007-08-29 02:01:23 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
it is wrong to deceive someone. in the beginning you are supposed to put your cards on the table and let her decide whether she wants to take that route or not. if she loves you she will forgive you. if she forgives you, be patient, cause it may take her a minute to be truly comfortable with her new situation
2007-08-29 02:33:33 · answer #4 · answered by sexyred1129 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not right to lie to someone about that sort of thing. after all people love gender, not the person. thats why i'm lesbian..i want a woman..not a man..so i wouldnt date a man who dressed like a woman or thought he was a woman. cuz he's not..hes a man..i want a woman..dont lie to people!
2007-08-29 01:56:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
She never knew you were a lesbian? Well I guess if she loves you, then she will come back and get over it. Otherwise you dont need her!
2007-08-29 01:56:50 · answer #6 · answered by Pregnant with #3 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are very peculiar what an odd thing to do.
2007-08-29 01:56:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
The big DUH sale is going on HUN think DUH
2007-08-29 01:57:22 · answer #8 · answered by cannot_remember_chit 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋