What to do?

Question

I just found out that my boyfriend had 2 rape count charges against him one in 95 and the other in o5, we have been together for a year and a half and the court decided a JUDGMENT ENTRY OF ACQUITTAL...I dont know what to do, my mind says leave and it also says stay!! Serious answers please, I'm having a hard enough time with this already! thanks

I had just asked this question to know what it meant to be aquitted, now i need a more serious answer now!

the one in 05 he said that she lied to the police because her boyfriend found out about the situation so she said he raped her, and with the one in 95 he had his friend has one of his witness...i dont know what to believe

he never talked about his past, his friends are fine, they havent been in trouble...he has never hurt me in any way!

my mom knows how do i deal with her in this matter too? she is the one that told me!

Answer 1

Yes your heart is saying stay because he has never done anything to you. Yes, everybody deserves a second chance and maybe he was falsely accused. But.....

Think about it. You can date for years and not be accused of this even once. But twice? Say he was innocent. In both cases the court found enough evidence in araignment (this is before actual court) to proceed w. the charges. What was going on and what kind of women was he hanging with that 2 different ones would report this knowing that if they lied they could get into trouble? If there were two something was up and there is more to the story. Odds are there are more.

A normal guy just dating does not face this even once muchless twice. If charged once would one not make sure they don't get into this situation again?

Think ahead. Trust is the foundation of a relationship and without that yes you can have love and get along but it will never be true love in the real sense. You will always wonder for the rest of your life if you get married. If you had kids you would always wonder. Everytime he goes out you will wonder.

I don't know what he does but this will always effect him. One time alone would be hard enough to explain but twice? Nowdays more and more companies do background checks. Even if working construction when one moves up to say foreman or sales they check. Even if working for oneself there is a bonding thing. Point is even though he was only charged he will never be successful..... get along yes but not successful.

He will have every explaination in the book but I would think step away regardless....... even if it is for a time. I am betting he will soon find someone else. And with this track record who knows what else is going on. Step away without weeks of talk and sort it out later.

How did your Mom find this out? Regardless you might be feeling a bit resentful but when it comes down to it and no matter what your relationship is w. her...... she is your family.

Answer 2

Rape is very serious. The one that said she lied - there has to be proof that she was raped, not just words, and that is why the entry of acquittal - I think that means not guilty. The other one in '95, what happened. With him a year and a half, so the rape charge happened right before you met him. And you are just finding out about it now. WOW. Makes me wonder if he didn't tell you about those serious things, what else is he hiding. If you want to send me some info via e-mail about him, I can try and locate his police record.

Answer 3

You must ask yourself about "TWO" rape charges. "ONE" may be denied or false charges against him, but TWO?
What are his other habits?
Does he speak of his past? Is it on the wrong side of the law or what could be considered reasonable?
What are his friends like? Have they been in trouble with the law?
Is he demeaning to you or over controlling?

Sometimes if you look at "other behaviours" you get a good idea of where the truth lies to the "target question"

Answer 4

if he never did anything to you i would stay if you love him.
aquitted means not enough evidence to convict or innocent
that can just be looked up in the dictionary. sorry to be obvious.