Why can't people just talk politics rather than label people, which ends the conversation?

Question

Many people I've met from other countries are amazed at how 'afraid' North Americans are to just talk with each other about political issues. In many other countries people meet after work and talk and argue and debate and then go home friends and do it again on other nights. In the U.S. people seem to act as though debating is dangerous to people's friendships or acquaintanceships. People seem to be less able to avoid hard feelings if they express different opinions about issues. Why is that do you think? Why are we so afraid of just talking and talking and talking openly with people we don't agree with?

Answer 1

Good question! I would say that one of the problems is that people are afraid to consider flaws in their own arguments.

I'm especially inspired by Noam Chomsky who is considered to be the Copernicus of modern linguistics. This man's work not only revolutionized his field but had far-reaching implications for other academic disciplines.

He was once asked which of his theories he thought would stand the test of time. "None of them," was his response. He was humble enough to recognize that even his most important discoveries would be taken apart and built upon. THAT's humility!

I think the other thing is that people are afraid to entertain the notion that they could be wrong or that their opponent is capable of making a good point while their overall position may in fact be terribly flawed or self-serving.

One of the things I used to hear all the time was "My mother/father always told me never to discuss politics or religion!" or "Opinions are like ********, everybody has one."

These notions are, to my way of thinking, just flat out ignorant. It drives me nuts when people imply an intellectual equality between two positions simply because there is more than one way to address a subject.

Me, I LOVE talking and talking and talking openly with people I don't necessarily agree with - especially people at my door trying to "spread the word of God." I know a lot of people are uncomfortable when Jehovahs Witnesses and Mormons come to the door. Not me! In fact, after listening to my (respectful) science lectures for a few minutes, these people usually start looking for excuses to leave while I try to get them to hang around.

I also like going at it with Republicans, Democrats and right-wing libertarians. I could talk politics, religion and history for hours on end and never tire of it.

Personally, I think a lot of people are just intellectual cowards, "content to warm their hands at the fires of their own prejudices" as William Golding once said.

Answer 2

Well, I generally have found people use terms like "Libs" or "Cons" when they have no ideas but are simply parroting something they heard someone else say who is generally equally uninformed. Talking politics with civility is actually quite difficult if either party is more interested in spreading dogma than exchanging ideas. Unfortunately, in the US (and perhaps other countries) a majority of people depend upon TV or radio for political information, and tend to blame TV and radio if they hear things they don't agree with. Very few actually research and discuss politics themselves, develop their own opinions, or are willing to hear ideas that don't support their own beliefs. They therefore tend to have very little information beyond what they are fed which makes them want to end the conversation quickly before their lack of knowledge becomes glaringly obvious.

I will also add, that many people will come from other countries and ask "why is your president so stupid?" or "do Americans realize the world is laughing at them?" and that is NOT a political conversation, that is just some douchebag asking dumb, insulting questions and doesn't deserve an intelligent conversation. I've heard that a few times and I don't ever continue that conversation.

Answer 3

Great question. Many say that the most dangerous subjects are sex, politics, and religion. I agree with you, we should be able to argue, debate, and remain friends. Often times, it doesm not happen.

Answer 4

I don't feel that Americans are afraid to talk about

different political opinions.

Americans have 200 years of history about true Democracy,

America is the only country on earth built by

different people from different political backgrounds.

We already past the stage of the need to debate differences.

We are in the stage of accepting differences,

which is the true spirit of Democracy,

The true spirit of America.

Answer 5

Politics have become needlessly out of control.
There are so many lies floating about no one really knows or understands the REAL issues.
The debates are endless turds floating in a broken toilet festering, needing the truth.
How can we all come together on all the issues for resolution when we cannot agree to fix the broken toilet?

Answer 6

It's not that most cannot -- they simply do not.

It's far easier to attack the messenger, or blast an entire large group of people -- less effort, less time -- as opposed to actually having a debate on the merits of an issue.

Some people are truly incapable of the intellectual debate, and can only froth and attack -- but many more who are capable sadly choose not to try and resolve or discuss actual issues -- because they can get what they want with far less effort by engaging in mindless attacks.

Answer 7

I get involved frequently with political conversations, face to face. Perhaps, it's easier online for people to just paste a label and ignore the actual issue than when looking someone in the eye.
Some folks are afraid to appear un-PC, but that is their loss.
I have friends and acquaintances I frequently disagree with, but we always agree to disagree. Visit small town cafes and you'll find debate.

Answer 8

Because they are brainwashed into believing that dissent makes one a traitor. Before Reagan most people had a healthy suspicion of the government. Since religion has taken over you are not a Christian if you oppose what is going on.

Answer 9

Soft and sore subject here in the states. Label's are handed out like candy and feelings are hurt just by looking at people. You would think with this much freedom people would use it to their advantage. But too much freedom is like a prison in most eyes. In the unconscious mind most people in America are waiting for the next person to make a move then ready to be the one who is right. So in other words waiting to be #1 is the concept I guess.

Answer 10

My theories...

1. Ego - Americans have a very hard time separating their ideas and beliefs from themselves. If you disagree with them then you must have an issue with THEM. It's quite maddening. When you take your ego out of your ideas, when you allow them to be their own thing, so they can grow, evolve and be separate from you, then you can deal with criticism because you know it is meant to be helpful. I love these kinds of talks, they help me grow.

2. They don't know enough to be able to defend their views so they start with the name calling. I find this is the easiest way to shut down questions and opposition.

3. We rely on sound bites, pundits and don't go and find information our own, it makes us lazy about our ideas. I'm doing my best ot fix this by researching before I post and answer things and to not react emotionally to the blatant lies. It gets frustrating.

I want to be around people who don't agree with me. I also believe that George Bush is not one of those people, he likes yes men and sees dissention as a lack of loyalty, this was demonstrated with their if you're not with us, you're against us. It's simplistic and not helpful.