How can I be redemmed?

Question

tired to join an organization not too long ago, an organization I had longed to be a part of,and got accepted, but didn't go on to fully become a member :( I know bummer.Well anyways, so a few months go by and I meet this guy, I mean he's handome, smart, a prominent leader, but he was three years younger than I plus he happened to be the brother and best friend of one of the members of the the organiztion I almost joined. We started talking, and there was some chemistry, but not enough to feel like I wanted to be in a relationship with him,(if you catch my drift)so he starts calling me late hours of the night, he invited me over, we got drunk, and had sex, I felt some guilt but we talked it over and he assured me that there was nothing to feel guilty about, he wasn't involved with anyone in the organization and everything between us would be only between us, so a few months go by, and we really didn't talk that much but we hooked up again, and I called him, he called me afterwards

Additional Details

3 minutes ago
(sorry for the long details) but yeah we were talking and I told him that I didn't want anyone to know about our sexual realtionship, I told him this because I didn't want people to think that I was a **** and put me in that category, and plus I told him that I might want to one day try to rejoin again, and he was like well, we do have a relationship, and in the midst of everything he was accusing me of playing on his phone, and all this stuff, but yet we got intimate, and we talked that night and he told me he thought I try to hard, and he started playing footsies, but then a few weeks goes by and I call to see if I left something at his house and he gets upset and tells me to never call him again and he'll tell everyone about our relationship, so now when I run into him, he doesn't speak, and the members sort of shun me as well,my question did I do anything wrong in your opinion and should I rejoin even though I might run into the same people, and why do you think he acted the way?

Additional Details

58 minutes ago
What was really crazy...is the fact that after he threatened me and told me not too call him anymore, his best friend calls me out the clear blue asking me to come to one of his events..and I'm thinking oh yeah" somthing is up

Answer 1

Dont have sex with him anymore.
If it comes up, admit to having sex with him and explain that you think it was a mistake... One that you definitely will not be repeating.
If you really want to join this organization, apply yourself and get in the right way.
Hold your head high.

Answer 2

D J

Do not, under any circumstances, go with him or any of his friends, ever again. He is using you, he has told his friends that you are easy, and most likely he has told his sister and best friend about your "relationship".

You made a huge mistake. You trusted someone who is untrustworthy. It is a mistake that many young women make. Hopefully you have learned from it. You need to focus on being the kind of person that you can respect. If you do not respect yourself, no one else will. If you have never asked Jesus into your life, I ask you to do so. God will be able to give you wisdom, and lead you as you go forward.

If you run into this young man, do not be rude. Don't be overly friendly either. If the subject of your relationship comes up again, just tell him that you are sorry, that you realize that it was a mistake, and that you have determined to lead a different kind of life from now on. Do not let him entice you back into going to any parties or meetings with him, or any of his friends. Make a clean break of it. Change anything necessary, to ensure yourself a new set of friends and acquaintances. God Bless You as you go forward with your life. ><>♥<><

Answer 3

ok the guy clearly has some issues. and you should have learned by now that if you say something along the lines of "dont tell anyone about__________" they will, or just use it against you.
my advice, since you're not in the group/org. you dont hav to see him that often, then stay away from the crazy moody mofo. and anyways if the group shun you b/c you had sex is that really such a great group after all? come on its sex, its a nautral thing, we're not living in the 50s or w/e.
and dont go to that crazy event, god knows what hes up to

Answer 4

Just forget about the guy and the organization as there is no doubt that he talked.

You may be getting set up if you do go over to the event and that would be the worse thing possible.

I would imagine that they may try to get you drunk for a repeat performance.

Seriously - stay away.

Answer 5

If you just get drunk and have sex with someone you already made up your mind not to persue a relationship with, that makes you easy. Instead of joining this group that you're not sure you want to join, you need to go to either AA or SLAA, and learn to like yourself, because you won't find validation with a group of people that have to vote on you anyway.

Answer 6

Why do you keep asking this question?

Answer 7

what is redemming?