dealing with teenage kids in a relationship?

Question

i have 3 adult kids of my own ages 19 son,and two daughters 18,16,they dont get along with the man in my life with whom i have 3 kids with,they have seen me go through some rough times in my relationship with him"abuse" for 1 year this went on until i had him arrested but yes i did let him back in my life,hoping things would work out,but as things were getting on track my kids started having mad attitude with him and was pushing him out of my life,they started nick picking with him and now its hard to attempt at this relationship because my kids totally dislike him,so what am i to do?

Answer 1

First of all nobody deserves to suffer any kind of abuse (physically-hitting, verbally-getting called names, mentally-feeling less than/hopeless, or any kind of abuse. I can testify that I too suffered abuse as a child, so of course this is what I settled for in my relationship. I was married 15 plus years and had six lovely children. I did everything to keep my family together. I suffered much abuse in my marriage, even my daughter had to call the police. That was not good. Yes, I too continued to let him back in and put up with his abusive controlling ways. I did not think I could make it after being a housewife for 10+ years. Well you know I got tired of being tired and I got a job and things have changed. I found out all the things I never imagined I could do, I could do and more. So, I went back to college and pursued a degree in education. I got out of the relationship, because he continued to verbally promise change, with no change in actions. It came to the point my teens were beginning to rebel and fed up ready to run away. I chose the family I wanted over my desire not to be alone. My kids came first. Do you know, my kids are doing better. One just graduated, and one graduates this year, and one next. By the grace of God none of my five girls are pregnant or in relationships, especially abusive. Here is what I tell you... Be honest with yourself has the abuse really stopped? Seek counselling. If it does not stop you need to consider change for your sake as well as your children. Children will not respect you or your husband if they are growing up on a roller coaster life of arguments, abuse, and seeing you the mom they love being abused. Children grown or small will not respect, because respect is something earned like trust. If your husband is changed, then he will have to be a strong man and endure, love, and be patient. Only time and much prayer heals the after effects of abuse. Truly, love stands the test of time, if he truly loves you nothing should be able to separate you. It is like me braking a crime and expecting not to pay the price for it. You cannot just walk away putting it behind you. God forgives but we must pay the price for our crimes. It is a crime to abuse anyone. You are special and deserve better, and your kids know this, that is why they are angered. They love you. You need to love yourself to be honest. Be careful pushing your children away for an abusive relationship, and if he is changed over time everyone will see. Time never lies, trust me. I have been on my own three years, my home has laughter, and fun. God has provided for all my needs, because I have no family. I will be receiving my bachelors degree in teaching in one year. The question is are you being honest with yourself? and if not when will enough be enough? Next, for better and for worst, is he willing to stick this out? This is a result of his choices... I pray the best for you and hope things work out. But do not let life push you down and cause you to think that this is the love you deserve. This is not why Jesus died. He died so you can live a good life. t/c

Answer 2

Kick the abuser to the curb. Why would you put your children through all of that. Leave him and start a real life for you and your children. If you need help, call the battered women's assistance program in your community. the police will have a phone number for you to contact them.

Answer 3

You need to sit down & have a long talk with them & find out why they are acting like this. Are they jealous , do they think he is beating or being abusive to you. Find out what the deal is. They have a reason for acting like this, give them a chance to explain there side & then explain your side & try to come to a compromise.

Answer 4

i do no longer want to be rude, yet are you intense or do you merely want to shack up. So is that this guy going to in basic terms be your buddy or are you 2 going to make a blended relations. you are the grownup right here and your women did no longer ask to be extra into this international and additionally you probably did no longer ask to grow to be a widow, yet i do no longer think of it could be so stable to furnish your women the thought you're approximately to create a clean relations and then the full deal blows up and that they are confronted with yet another loss. you're entitled to a existence, yet save it inner maximum and coffee keyed--you're able to do this for yet another 4 years. i do no longer think of he could be sound asleep on your place with the girls interior the domicile. save your cellular telephone charged up and assure them which you will constantly be reached. with a bit of luck, you have kin the place they could have sleepovers or who can come and stay with the girls once you want to be out over night. you could accomplish what you want to do devoid of having a guy sleep on your mattress. i'm a widow, too.

Answer 5

hi

Answer 6

first of all why would you even get back together with someone who abuses you? don't you think thats why your kids don't like him? they are looking out for their mother. break up with the loser. your kids come first no matter how old they are. I can't believe your even asking this question.

Answer 7

No one wants to see their mom be abused, and see her WILLINGLY get back with the guy that abused her.

Answer 8

You are so so stupid! how cud you choose a man like that when all the while you have kids already? are you crazy?!? how could you have your kids put up with someone like that?!? SELFISH ****!!!! DIE!!!!

Answer 9

this is an easy one to answer, and you already now it. your children come first... it's tough to hear, I know... but it's the truth... good luck, my heart is with you.