Is it weird for two people to date and have kids and stuff like that until they die, but never get married? Not that nobody has proposed, just that they got denied a few times and are afraid to ask again. I mean like... they kind of want to get married, but at the same time they are afraid to make the commitment. What do you think they should do?
2007-08-28 12:11:27 · 32 answers · asked by Courtney 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
By the way, its my fault. I dont have any kids, he has a son. Im just not the kind of person who should get married. I could if I wanted to and people think that I should, but I dont know why I dont want to. You think that I may have commitment issues?
2007-08-28 12:27:48 · update #1
Sh*t or get off the pot!
2007-08-28 12:14:14 · answer #1 · answered by YUMMY1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If 2 people have been together for a long time and have kids they should get married. I know a couple that have been together for 18 years and have a child. He recently got sick and is now on disability.It was several months before he got disability. They were having a tough time. If he died she would not get any benefits from him. I would not want to be with a man that long and put that much effort into a relationship and not be married. Also, morally speaking, I just think it is wrong. What are they teaching their daughter about commitment? Nothing at all.
2007-09-05 12:01:37 · answer #2 · answered by Littlebear51 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you have commitment issues. Marriage is a legal contract and a responsibility and it is protection, too. Your boyfriend should insist on marrying you if you plan on having children. You want your children with him to have legal protection and benefits. What I think you should do is get down to the basics and ask each other if you really ever want to stay together until you die. If that is the truth for both of you, then of course you should get married and get it over with! If you don't think you should be 'tied down' to those kinds of predictions, then you know for sure you are going to lose the other partner to someone else. It is just an option such people always want to have available - to walk out the door, no strings, no recriminations. However, be aware that you are only fooling yourselves. When one of you does walk out the door, there will be just as much pain, just as many recriminations but just no legal strings or responsibilities!
2007-09-05 05:50:26 · answer #3 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With a divorce rate like ours in the USA it's a wonder that fear of commitment hasn't brought all marriages to a screeching halt.
If marriage is important to one side and not the other the relationship is doomed in the long run. Partners who go along with the idea get disillusioned and eventually seek out more suitable partners.
Couples who spend their lives together unmarried have made a decision together to be committed to the relationship without the paperwork.
I say you never know till you try-so get hitched and be happy!
2007-08-28 12:28:24 · answer #4 · answered by R M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people feel good enough in their relationship that they don't need a marriage certificate. Just remember that you may have to answer questions from the kids as to why mommy has a different last name. If your relationship works then great but make sure you have some agreements written down to take care of the kids and property if things don't work out.
2007-08-28 12:23:35 · answer #5 · answered by mpaz1966 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably do have committment issues, but at least you know you don't have any desire to get married. It's not that weird. Too many people get married who probably should not. Look at the divorce rate! It's a good thing that you know yourself this well and are not being forced into marriage just because others think it's the 'thing" to do.
2007-09-05 10:16:57 · answer #6 · answered by makeloans2 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is weird, in it self. Are you talking about you and a male friend,that have children,and stuff,but they never got married? What is your question really. I think they should talk it out if they are afraid of commitment I think marriage is out,but what about the kids.?
2007-08-28 13:27:25 · answer #7 · answered by Here Kitty Kitty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no its not weird a lot of people don't ever want to get married . if they have been together for a long time 4, or 5 years then it may be right for them an let the good times roll
2007-09-04 05:11:50 · answer #8 · answered by als been a dad 3 times 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the sad thing when you dont' get married the issues after you die are horrible for the one living and that is where it comes to bad blows. you know that is ok if you dont' want to committ but then again it would be smart to think about this. sure is sad. cause it could be that some of your things you both have could go to parrents or whatever do you want this? oh well you have to thnk about this.
2007-09-03 13:24:15 · answer #9 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are happy together and love each other who cares if they get married.Marriage is an old outdated concept.All marriage is is a piece of paper saying you 2 can live together.It is now 2007 and people can live together,have children,and love each other without that piece of paper.Just because you don't have that paper don't let the religious fanatics preach to you either.Who is to say they are right anyway.
2007-08-28 12:21:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like they're pretty committed already if they have kids together, but what I don't understand is why not get married? They've done everything else that goes along with being married.....
2007-08-28 12:16:37 · answer #11 · answered by ~Josie~ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋