N ◙ Okay..... Story writers.....Ready for something new????

Question

The first 6 people to post ONE phrase that they would like to have listed, will have their phrase listed. ( IT MUST BEGIN WITH THE LETTER ► " N " ◄)
So instead of me making up the phrases.....YOU have a hand in it!!!!
Confused??? You'll see...... It's really quite simple....
After I see the first 6 phrases, I will LIST THEM IN THE ADDED DETAILS....THEN,GO BACK TO MY QUESTION , LOOK AT THE PHRASES AND WRITE A LITTLE STORY THAT MUST INCLUDE THOSE 6 PHRASES.
P.S. I WILL NOT ACCEPT BATHROOM HUMOR OR PROFANITY.
█ If you are not one of the first 6 responders, you are still invited to write a story and compete. ◄◄ Good luck and have FUN~~~~~~~~~

►CAN YOU WRITE A LITTLE STORY THAT INCLUDES THESE 6 PHRASES? ◄
1. Never in a million years did I think ____________
2. Not nary a one, cowboy; what's it to ya?
3. No way, Jose!
4. No. My hand did not just act like a _______
5. Nonsense, she cried, I never said THAT.
6. NO!
███

Answer 1

"NO! No way Jose! Never in a million years did I think she'd wind up like some kind of tomboy whoopin', hollerin' cowgirl! You see, I grew up with her, and when I tell you this girl obsessed over shoes, clothing, make-up, man oh man alive, you'd see her at Macy's make-up counter every Friday after school, gettin' her free make-up job." My voice rose in disbelief.

"Right after high school, she 'fell in' with some rich old coot who draped her in furs, decked her out in jewels, and she'd be tippy toein' round the sidewalks of Dallas like she owned the place. Never even saw her in a pair of jeans! Now look at her!" I commanded.

We leaned over the rails at the rodeo, watching her ride this speckled bull, one gloved hand under the strap, the other waving in the air, twisting and turning, moving with the bull. Our mouths hung open. She lasted 12 full seconds to win the round, and strode out of the ring, almost bow legged, like some kind of JEN YOU WINE cow dude. We bolted from our seats to go down for a parly with this metamorphosed creature.

"LouANNE?" I called. "Is that REALLY YOU??" Louanne looked over at us, dust smeared, pig tailed and panting.
"Yup, s'me allright and dang where'd ya'll come from! Haven't seen ya'll in yearrs!" she drawled.

"Louanne, you've got me damn near floored unconscious" pal Sue gasped. "How'd you come to turn out like this. You swore in highschool that you'd never even wear pants, let alone jeans!"

"Nonsense!" she cried, "I never said THAYAT...did I?" she started smiling. "Well, guess it is a big change for ya'll to swaller in one settin'. Guess so 'ndeed." she grinned. Tobacco stained her teeth, once so perfectly white. She gestured us to follow her to her trailer, removing her suede brown gloves as she ambled ahead, slapping the dust off her jeans with the gloves. Sue elbowed me in the ribs, wearing a "get a load of THAT" look on her face.

In the trailer, Sue blurted "Whatever happened to the old coo...er, to Mr. Smothers?"
"Oh, I'm all through with that. Men! Won't touch'em ever agin. Not nary a one cowboy." She saw as Sue and I exchanged quick glances.. "what's it to ya'll anyhow? They ain't half as fun as ridin' a good bull!" LouAnne threw a can of budweiser at each of us, and pulled one out of the portable fridge for herself. She daintily pried the tin ring, held the can with her fingertips, pinky extended. We stared. She caught us and glanced at her hand. "No. Mah hand did not just act like a sissy girl's!" She laughed out loud. "Man, I guess you kin take the manners out of the girl, butcha caint take the girl out of the manners!"
We laughed and chugged and hee hawed for the rest of the live-long day.

Answer 2

"Never in a million years did I think my cheerleader coach would be a double leg amputee," said Nicole, the captain of the squad.

(I'm still trying to ferret out people's take on this storyline I'm working on in the TV series I've created, about a former cheerleader whose legs were amputated, and now she is becoming the coach of the college cheerleader squad. If this isn't something you want to delve into, you don't have to.)

Answer 3

"Hey Tamer, you ready for a rematch?" asked Bad Man Jose.

"No way, Jose. NO!" I replied. I just wasn't in the mood. Never in a million years did I think Jose would show up to my wedding... and yet here he was.

Traci... I mean Buttercup, for she'd changed her name, so she could be "Buttercup Tamer" moseyed on over. "Introduce me to your friend, James," she said. Did I mention I changed my name too?

"Buttercup, this is Bad Man Jose. He's the guy who got us together," I told her.

I was annoyed at Jose. I'd hoped never to see him again. Involuntarily, my fingers twitched toward my belt... which for once didn't have my pokeballs hanging from it. Darn rental tux.

"Itchy hands, Tamer?" asked Jose.

"No. My hand did not just act like a crawly spider going for my weapon," I said.

"Not armed, are you?" Jose asked. He was enjoying this way too much.

"Not nary a one, cowboy; what's it to ya?" I stuck out my tongue.

"Your girlfriend said she'd like to run away with me," Jose provoked.

"Nonsense," she cried, "I never said THAT." Traci, I mean Buttercup, was cute when she was angry. Did I mention she looked just like her bridesmaids?

"Hey Jose, I'm thinking you're mistaking her for someone else." I pointed at the bridesmaids.

"Oh man, you're right! It's freaky man, everyone in this town looks alike!" said Jose.

"Yup, and that's why everyone wears a name badge," I told him. "Stick around long enough, and you'll get one too." I pointed at mine.
"Welcome to Rusty Spring" in small letters, and
"James" in larger letters.

Answer 4

no my hand did not just act like an answering machine.

......I dont quite get what you're doing but as close as my brain could think of this is what I got

Answer 5

No way, Jose!

Answer 6

"Not nary one, cowboy; what's it to ya?"

Answer 7

Noontime and Festus Haggen stagered out of the Long Branch Saloon and noticed someone familiar,"Never in a million years did I ever think I would see you here. Whatcha doing here Mr. Palladin?
Have you come here to see Miss Kitty? Matthew's not gonna like that."
"Well, Festus, let me put it this way. I have been from New Orleans to Memphis and you know what I saw? Not nary a one cowboy", the man in black spoke slowly.
"What's it to ya? I mean why are you here, now? Is it for Miss Kitty?" Festus inquired.
"No, actually I have to be here on business. Where is your Marshall?"
"Let me see, I think he said something about checking up on the Starr Ranch, they've been having problems out there with some of Myra's kinfolk."
"Yes, I know Miss Shirley and her Paw. She's a cousin or something to Frank & Jesse's Ma, Mrs. Zerelda. I think I 'll wait over at the Saloon, tell him I'm here. He's expecting me."
Palladin strolled over to the Saloon, pushed open the swinging doors, stopped just short of the long oak bar.
Miss Kitty was standing by the staircase when the man walked in, "Is that you? I haven't seen you since Memphis and THAT night. I told you then & I'm telling you straight out, I'm not interested. It was fun, but this is where I plan to be."
"Now, Kitty, I not here to pick up where we left off, way back when. I'm here on business. Seems that a certain young lady from here decided to lift a gentleman's wallet and the keys to a very important documents belonging to the Mexican Government. And I've been tracking her for several months. I believe that she might be here in Dodge."
"No way, Jose! My girls have been with me for some time & there hasn't been anyone new in these parts, that I know of."
She put her hand out and withdrew it quickly as he reached to caress it. "No!" she said, "My hand did not just act like a rattlesnake. I thought you were trying to hold it."
"I was, but I guess not, now." He replied.
Marshall Matt Dillon entered the saloon, " Kitty, is this the varmint, you were telling me about?" Before she could
answer, the Marshall was shaking Palladin's hand like they were old pals."How long you been in the saddle? Do you think that she's in these parts? Here, let me buy you a drink. Is this the man, who jilted you in Memphis?"
Kitty Russell was outraged, "Nonsense!" She cried," I never said THAT!" And with this she rushed up the stairs in tears.
"Look what you've done," spoke Palladin.
"Whatdya mean, I've done? You're the one that showed up here." The Marshall was quite adament.
"I'm here on business, I told her that. You're the one with the big mouth. All I know is that woman loves you and you're too blind or dumb to see it. She doesn't feel that way about me & no, I'm not the one that jilted her. His name is McSween, & has a store over in the New Mexico Territory, some place called Lincoln."
"Well, lets get onto business. Where are you planning on looking for this girl? And do you know who she is?"
"I think this may be tied in with Sam Starr & his wife. I'd like to talk to Sam, will you help?"
"Sure, I'm the Marshall. It's my job."
The two tall men moseyed out of the saloon where the horses were tied, mounted their steeds and rode south towards the Starr Ranch.
It wasn't much of a ranch, just a homestead, a couple of cows, a few chickens and a few horses. Sam Starr was part Lakota Indian. He lived on this simple ranch with his wife, Myra Shirley. Myra had a wildness to her & that's probably what attracted Sam's attention. Myra was in the barn when the two tall men rode in & she never saw them. Sam was out near the watering trouff when the Marshall & his friend rode up. "Afternoon, Sam," spoke the Marshall. Sam just glanced up gave a slight grunt & continued what he was doing.
"Sam, mind if we talk to you for awhile? This here is Mr. Palladin. He's lookin' for someone. Maybe you seen her in these parts. Is Myra here, I haven't seen her about in awhile. Did she get back from Coffeeville?"
Sam glanced up from his work & told the two men," No, she didn't go to see her Paw. She went with her cousins to take care of some family business, but she's back now. Myra, MYra! MYRA BELLE! Come out here! The Marshall wants to see you, Come on woman."
Myra who had been in the barn picking up the baby chicks & returning them to the hen house, heard Sam yelling about something, started to go out but decided to look first."NO!" she said and turned around. Looking for her hidden friend, then finally spying him in the loft." Cole, the law is here. Take Zoe and go. Take my horse, I'll explain it to sam, later. That man out there with Dillon is Palladin & he's looking for Zoe. Take her & GO!"
Cole Younger woke the sleeping Zoe Dalton and told her, "Shhhh, Its time to go, Johnny Law is here. Belle's lending us her horse. If we go now, we can get away."
"Ya'll take care." And Myra Belle Starr waved to her outlaw friends.
Coming out of the barn, with 3 chicks still in her apron pockets, spoke softly," Well, hello Marshall Dillon, what brings you out here?"
Palladin began describing this young woman and explained that she had stolen some money & some very important documents that the Mexican Government wanted back.
She just smiled and said, "Why, no I haven't seen anyone that sounds like that...Why would I?"
And Belle Starr smiled her secret smile.

Answer 8

NO!