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Hi.
Okay so over the summer i was hooking up w this guy ( only been w him ever no one else). this was going on since may. we werent dating or even close, we were just sleeping together. So he left for college in nyc, and im still here in buffalo going to school. I found out today that i am pregnant. It is def w him no doubts!! I dont know what I should do. I dont think i should tell him bc i know he will only be very upset and not do anything. Also im not sure if im even going to keep the baby. I dont know what i should do. suggestions???????????????? thankyou!

2007-08-28 10:23:43 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Pregnancy

I just turned 20 and he is also 20.

2007-08-28 10:53:53 · update #1

23 answers

It is his baby too and he has a right to know and a responsibility to provide financial support. It is not only your fault that you are pregnant... it takes two to tango. He may want to be involved you never know but there is only one to find out.

2007-08-28 10:30:50 · answer #1 · answered by ஜBECஜ ~Mama to Lucy & bump~ 6 · 3 0

He's a grown man. And he knew pregnancy was a possibility the whole time he was sleeping with you.

I would take a little time to determine what you want to do, and then tell him. When you tell him, you can say, "I am planning to ____." It is his baby, too, so if you are planning to relinquish the baby for adoption, it would nice to give him the first option of parenting the child himself. If you are planning to parent the child, then he has a legal responsibility to provide for the child, since he helped bring the baby into this world.

He may surprise you and come through for you. I know, I know -- it's doubtful, but at the very least, by telling him, maybe he won't be so quick to hook up with a girl he doesn't intend to date, let alone make babies with.

In the meantime, do take care of yourself. Are you gettting prenatal care? It's vital! If you don't have anybody to help you with that, call your local Catholic Social Services and they can tell you where to go for help (you don't have to be Catholic).

2007-08-28 10:43:39 · answer #2 · answered by sparki777 7 · 0 0

OK yes you should tell him. Don't predict how he will act you said you were not even close so how would you know what he will do or feel? That's just wrong! You guys were mature enough to get in to bed together, be mature enough to figure out the life of this Innocent baby! How would you like someone keeping something so serious from you. He has a right to know it is his baby too! And I can not comment on abortion because I think they are wrong. Its not BIRTH CONTROL!! Be responsible, Grow up!

2007-08-28 10:46:34 · answer #3 · answered by kymmeloves88 2 · 0 0

I think every person involved in making a baby, deserves to know. If he doesn't do anything about it, well let him make that decision. Maybe he will surprise you? Whether or not u will keep it, I am not going to lecture u, because it depends on everyone's circumstances....But make sure u can handle guilt if you abort, there is also adoption, and if you do keep the baby, make sure u realize whats involved. I believe you might feel guilty if you don't tell him. I never want to live a life of "what if's", so I choose to 'do' and never look back.
Good Luck.

2007-08-28 10:39:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

first of all the fact that your pregnant is a miracle you cant imagine how many women in the world are suffering , anxious and praying to God to be able to at least just have one baby , and your thinking of not having your miracle. You should tell him he has the right to know it does not matter if you wants it or not if you don't want to get pregnant you have to be more responsible and protect your self . Remember that men come and go but your baby will be there with and for you forever that's the only thing that's yours and its a real miracle. please think about it , there are other options for you than not having the baby . by the way can you give us an age? good luck

2007-08-28 10:48:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Whether you maske the decision to keep the baby or not he still deserves to know (since you are positive he is the father). Also, whether you think he would be responsible or not, you never know until you try. Plus, he deserves a chance. You never know...he might be estatic. On the other hand, it takes time for a lot of ppl to adjust. If he doesn't want anything to do with the baby, there are plenty of other places you can go for help and support as a single mother.

2007-08-28 10:33:31 · answer #6 · answered by .:Adrians' So Handsome:. 3 · 1 0

Either way you need to tell him. If it was me I would have the baby no matter what...if you do not want to raise he/she then give it up for adoption. Make another family happy that can not be blessed with kids. He might want the baby...you never know. You should tell him, he might be supportive of you. It never hurts to ask. Hopefully a lessoned was learned from this experiance....just dont kill your baby.

2007-08-28 10:58:17 · answer #7 · answered by bpfashion123 3 · 0 0

I would at least tell him and then you guys decide together.. He helped make a baby that is growing in your tummy right now it would be better to just tell him so he doesn't find out from someone else.. If you guys decide on adoption that's a great move.. There is plenty of people out there looking to adopt and you would be helping someones dream of becoming parents come true and they would love you forever at least I would.... If you ever need to chat you can send me a message would love to get to know you better and offer advice if you need it.... Thanks...

2007-08-28 19:33:39 · answer #8 · answered by friend 2 · 0 0

It's up to you if you decide to keep the baby or not. If you don't then you really don't have a reason to contact him IMO. However if you do keep the baby be aware that most states will not provide any assistance if you don't list who the father is so that they can go to him for child support.

2007-08-28 10:38:52 · answer #9 · answered by starfire978 6 · 0 0

1. this is your choice, your life, your pregnancy. Make your own Decision- don't let someone Else's ideas or judgment sway you ultimately you know what is right for you. adoption or abortion thankfully u do have a choice.
2. If you chose to have the baby you should at least let him know.
it is something he needs to process weather or not he takes any responsibility.

2007-08-28 13:26:32 · answer #10 · answered by ravenlocks 3 · 0 0

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