I'm 19, how can I deal w/ my relationship w/ my parents?

Question

I'm , in college, fortunately doing great in my life. I live alone, though my parents live close to me. Unfortunately our relationship has been extremely painful since I was 14. I made mistakes, was immature, realy messed up, was mean to my lil bro, was jealous, a very difficult phase. They were too harsh, couldn't understand I was just a troubled girl. I got a harsh punishment though I sincerely regretted and for months they made me suffer alot cause they didn't trust me, though I had got over that phase completely. I went through terrible days , wanted trust, forgiveness and didn't get it. They didn't act like parents who love, but just like law. The finally forgave and trusted me but I was so shocked that ended up living w/ my grandma, at 15. She was great, gave me love and trust. She passed away, but gave me an apartment and some money, so I can live on my own. My parents want to restablish our relationship, but why? When I needed them they were crue.

They say they are proud of me and want me back, say they suffer a lot with my distance. But I don't want that painful relationship anymore, I have my life, friends, and my memories of them are extremely painful. The fact is they made me suffer and that's my memory of them. Parents should love and support even when kids mess up, this is part of growing up.

Answer 1

You're 19? What about your 15-year old daughter? Trolls are stupid people, and they always get caught. Grow up.

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ajg1O06V1e2FSTTIz6FrRQwgBgx.?qid=20070801113051AAsTDCc

Answer 2

Maybe you could try counseling together. I would show them this and let them know how you feel. Maybe you can find a way to let them in a little bit into your life. They're probably trying to make up for the past. Maybe you can do a family dinner once a month at a mutually agreed upon restaurant, out in public, where emotions can't (or at least shouldn't) get out of control. You can tell them about things you want to share, like school or your job, but don't share things you want to keep private. One or two hours a month should help all of you. Good luck!

Answer 3

It's time to forgive your parents. As you have admitted you were not perfect, neither are are parents. Children can cause their parents' pain like no one else. I'm sure you made your parent's hearts ache and your brothers.

I suggest counseling. Don't place blame, just accept responsibility and heal. I pray blessings over your life.

Ex 20:12
"Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

De 5:16
"Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Answer 4

As much as we would like them to be, parent's aren't always perfect. They're human just like the rest of us. I can't attest to exactly how cruel they were, you may get a little older and get a little more understanding about why they were they way they were - but either way, they deserve a chance. Lay it out for them, once and for all about how you felt and how you now feel. If they are sincerely sorry then don't bring it up again and give them that chance to make things right.

Answer 5

i've seen this question before. you've asked this question for months. you're not 19. you were 14 when you asked this question. why r u lying? there's no reason to.

talk to your parents, make them understand

EDIT: i was looking atr your other questions and you say you have a 15 year old daugher, that isn't really possible if you're '19'. give up!

Answer 6

I am so sorry you feel this way and that you are in so much pain. Maybe you should go and talk to a councelor that could help you with all this pain you are feeling. Good Luck!