Is she after my husband?

Question

I am 7 months pregnant, and we had to switch doctors, and the new doctor appeared to be my husband ex! I did not know before. He never even mentioned her.
They were at the university together, and she invited him to meet the old friends. He went there and came back at 1 a.m., all bright and happy.
Then he met her for lunch "accidentally", and then - for dinner again, and she was supposed to introduced her boyfriend then, but he did not turn up, and she said that they split, and that he went back to his wife!
Then they started texting each other, and he never says what about. He said that she is lonely and need a friend to talk about her break up. I found photos of them from the party on his mobile, and she is hugging him as if they were a couple!
And now she wants him to represent her as her PR and he is having a new client dinner with her tonight!
Is she after him and what should I do?
She is extremely beautiful, with red hair and green eyes.

and when he came home, he smelled of her perfume.

Answer 1

First, she wouldn't be my doctor. Second, he wouldn't be seeing the birth of this child. Sounds pretty rotten to me.

Answer 2

You first need to switch doctors for the health (physical and mental) of everyone involved. And no dear, she is not after your husband...in her mind, she already has him again. And it is obvious she HAS HAD him recently if you know what I mean. He has strayed.

Sounds like your soon to be ex-husband is successful and you will do just fine getting the courts to pony up support.

I think it is OK to keep most stuff about an ex to yourself (I bet many wish their spouse would) except for 3 things 1) they have an ex, 2) who they are and 3) why did it end (at least his side of it). If you didn't even know he was married before, that is problem #1.

Yes, I have run across old friends accidently at lunch but this happens very rarely. If he had lunch with her after seeing her at the doctors visit, then this was no accident. You know that you would not have put it in quotes.

Why were you not invited (or just there) at dinner? The boyfriend thing is probably a second reason why she is doing your husband. And apparently she doesn't hold to the sanctity of marriage so there is nothing holding her back (like guilt or shame). She obviously cares very little for you and that is why I don't think she is going to make a very good doctor for you.

He won't tell of the text messages because he doesn't want you to know. Yes, it is kind of that simple.

He was at a party with her? Where are you? Your 7 months pregnant but not chained to the house are you?

If (and this is a really big if) they haven't (I doubt it) then you guys need counseling because the baby needs a good dad (he doesn't sound like such a candidate) AND it should be known to him and her that future contact between them is a no go...business deals be dammed.

Answer 3

Sounds like this is the beginning of an affair. I am not saying that he has been unfaithful to you physically yet, but they are pretty much dating even if they haven't done the horizontal tango yet. I would first tell your husband how you feel. Then go on to tell him that if he is to meet with her about any business that it needs to be done with you there. I would let her know that the situation is uncomfortable for you. Then I would change doctors. I do think your husband is a total azz. You are his wife and you are having his child and he is macking on your dr! How sleazy! I would also hire a pi and have him followed around a bit just to see exactly what he is doing after we have our little talk. Not to mention her reputation would be squat when I got finished with her.

Answer 4

Wow your so called husband isn't stepping to his responsibilities by being that loyal husband to be there for this time of need. He seems to care more about his ex girlfriend's loneliness than living a life with you and enjoying the pregnancy. First thing's first I' would find a different doctor and once I found out it was his ex I would have stopped seeing that physician. Next, tell your husband you don't approve or feel comfortable that he is seeing his ex gf even if he says there is no chemistry between them. Tell him to lay off dinners, chatting, and anything else he plans to do with her and focus on you and his unborn child. Hopefully he'll realize he's wrong and cut off ties with her. If not, you don't need him. You can do better. Good luck though!

Answer 5

Yes....I think she is...and you will find out how faithful a husband you have probably.

I actually had this happen to me when I was pregnant, and my husband was working a distance from home....about the time I realized what this woman was trying to do, my husband did as well and immediately changed it....he very much believes
in faithfulness in marriage.

You can let your husband know that you want him to end this....he should listen to you....you can say she makes you uneasy, etc..a woman usually knows what another woman is up to. If you "clue" him in...he might at least start paying attention....and have a "heads up" because many man are just blind. But do let him know what she is doing....and that you don't want him spending time with her.

But try to do it in a rational way so he won't think you are imagining things just out of jealousy. Just tell him to "wake up"!...and change your doctor!...and I guess you could let her know that if she sees any more of your husband, the hospital is going to hear about it!

Answer 6

Honey, You need to step in a put a stop to this "relationship" that your husband is having with your doctor, his ex. Cant she see that he loves you? He shouldnt be leaving you, his pregnant wife at home alone to go and see his ex. If he doesnt have any feelings for her, and he really just wants to be her friend then he should invite you to go with, even if you dont go, at least if you do you can watch..."supervise". I went out when I was 81/2 months pregnant, so you can still have fun. Dont worry what she looks like, pregnant women are always beautiful, bacause they have a baby in their bellies!!! Good luck, and if you have to get your girlfriends to kick her A$$!!!!
P.S. congrats on your baby!!! hope all goes well

Answer 7

You poor woman. For goodness sakes, GO TO ANOTHER DOCTOR. It looks like you have either been put on the back burner in your marriage, or that this was an intentional thing for her to become your doctor. You should have full confidence in your private doctor, preferably one that has NOT had a relationship with your child's father. I feel so bad for you, do not let this kind of humiliation happen to you, tell him you do not like the situation and get a doctor you can trust. If he will not take heed to your concerns, I am afraid that your relationship is over with this man.

Answer 8

First of all, I would change Drs. Second they are tooo involve with each other. Third, I sure would be concerned about her going after your husband. Fourth, she can get someone else to represent her. Tell your husband you are not comfortable with this situation. You trust him, but Not her. As far as needing a friend to talk to, doesn't she have other friends? I would also let her know how you feel about all of this and see if it continues. Good luck.

Answer 9

I think they both have a hell of a lot of nerve. I would sit him down for a very blunt to the point conversation and then go from there. In the mean time find a new doctor, and I would keep an eye on him. She knows exactly what she is doing and he's an idiot.. Either get him to respect you or let his sorry *** go.....

Answer 10

It really sounds like he's cheating. I don't mind if my husband goes out with his friends and stuff, but I wouldn't let him go out with an ex of his by himself...No way! If he expressed interest in all of us hanging out, the maybe, because i'd witness what was going on.

As far as her being your doctor, if it's not too late in your pregnancy, switch to another doctor. She sounds like she's after him, and knows the way to get him because she's already been with him.

As far as your husband, tell him how you feel. If he doesn't take into consideration your feelings, then leave him. Make him see what it's like with you not around. I wouldn't use the baby against him though, because that's not fair to the child.

Answer 11

OK, he's not even trying to cover it up is he? APPARENTLY, you are beautiful too or at least he thought so long enough to get you pregnant. There's that out of the way. This wonderful "EX" needs to stand down but she obviously has different ideas. He won't quit, especially if she's giving it up sexually and you are unable to. Ask him if she's worth it to him, point blank in his face. She doesn't want your man, she wants to boost her own ego. She is unwilling or afraid of any commitment so she tries to USE or "barrow" the married man, taking advantage of a time you both are vulnerable. I hope you win, you sound like the better catch.