I need some positive words please!?

Question

I am almost 27 and I left my husband 8 months ago because he is a alcoholic and it was starting to affect my daughters lives.I don't have anything to my name.I am living back with my parents and I am just trying to figure out where my life is going.I work at a grocery store right now and everyone that works there is young and everyone is going to college.I am so down cause I don't even have my Ged.I feel like I am too dumb to go back to school because I don't remember anything.I don't know whats wrong with me becuause I know that I don't want to be a cashier for the rest of my life.How to I get out of this state of mind and do something with my life.I have a 10 year old daughter and a 3 year old.Has anyone been in this situation?Thanks, and please no rude comments.

Answer 1

You can get your GED. Call around find out who is giving classes. They help you with the things you think you forgot trust me you haven't forgot much. It costs very little and trust me 27 isn't going to be the youngest in your class!! Then decide from there what you really want to do with yourself. You are a strong enough person to take care of two babies so you are strong enough to do this.....good luck

Answer 2

I've been there, but I raised my 4 on my own, mom wasn't around to help. You are young yet and can go back to school, which is something you should do. do you have a local community college in your area? Go check them out, you can take classes for your GED, one at a time, so you can still work and have time for your daughters. Once you get started in classes, you will see you have not forgotten as much as you think and the testing is not really all that hard. not having a diploma or ged will keep you from obtaining many jobs and you will be stuck in lower paying job for the rest of your life, which is not good for you or the kids. Getting the ged will help build your selfesteem, and once you do this, you can get loans and grants through the community college for more schooling. they also can give you an aptitude test and tell you where to focus your skills and interests so you can go into a field of employment that will pay well and make you happy. classes usually run 1-2 days per week for 3-4 hours and evening classes are available.

you don't want to be a cashier for the rest of your life and I am sure you do not want to live in with your parents or live in some run down dump either, go apply for food stamps, if you need to, you can also get medical coverage for your daughters. The f/s office can also help you get into programs for single women with children for job training and schooling so that you can get into a higher paying job. you will have to ask for the guidance from them and follow up on all leads they give, no matter how unlikely you think they may be. there is housing available for low income families that takes a while to get into, but can be a great help in getting you through the rough times, and getting a foot up on a better life for you and the kids.

I had 4 kids at 21, all under 5 and was on my own, IF I CAN- YOU CAN TOO! I am now 46, and run my own business, employing 5 people, it is a small tree srevice company and I make a very good living.

YOU are the only one who can make these changes in your life, get out there and research what is available to you in your area, you deserve more and so do your daughters!
you can email me anytime, if you'd like to

Answer 3

You are in a very difficult position and the wat out of this position will also be difficult. I would say that you should find an adult education class and work at getting your G.E.D.. This will not be easy while working and raising children. No part of this will be easy and you must accept that as a fact and move on from there. The adult education calsses will not only help you get your G.E.D. but most all of them can prepare you for entrance exam testing for a junior college or even a 4 year college. You must have a good skill or education to be able to take care of yourself in the workforce these days. Going to school while raising kids is hard but being poor is harder. I have been there and I know education pays off big time. Even if you plan on marrying a guy to help care for you, you will be a better person if you have an education. You will attract a better man, be a better Mother to your children, have more confidence in yourself, the pride of acheivement. All of these things will make you feel better in the long run.

Answer 4

Lots of people hit rock bottom before they become successful. You can do it too! :)

Get your GED so your kids can see you succeed! Have your 10 year old help you study for the parts she is able.

You did the RIGHT thing by leaving your hubby! In my state (Kentucky) there are places giving free GED classes and paying for the test for people. So, call around to see what kind of help you can get. Finalize the divorce with your hubby and make sure you are getting child support from the loser.

Focus all your energies now on building a good life for your children. There is nothing wrong with an honest day's work and you should not be ashamed in any way.

Chin up! You are strong (you went through childbirth TWICE!) and YOU CAN DO THIS! :)

Try to make a list of things you want to do over the next 5 years, then break that down in baby steps to get there. It will give you a "roadmap" of sorts to guide you.

I will keep you in my thoughts! Good luck! :)

Answer 5

Hi Jennifer,

You demonstrated strength and intelligence and confidence by removing yourself and your daughters from a dangerous situation. This shows more courage than a lot of people.

Take things one step at a time. Right now you are feeling depressed because your life has changed. It's a good starting point for you to get headed in the right direction.

Tell your employer you are interested in working toward your G.E.D. They may have financial assistance, or offer adjusted hours so you can get into the program. A lot of employers value a person who wants to further their education and be a stable employee.

Continue working. Building experience is just as valuable, to many employers, as any degree. Work and demonstrate a strong work ethic for your daughters to follow. This is the most important thing you can be doing right now.

Living with your parents is a safe place for your family to be. Don't pressure yourself to move out on your own until you know you can support the girls without sacrificing time with them.

If you take each day of your life and remember what you do have, two beautiful healthy daughters and a safe place to live, it will be easier to climb out of this funk you are in.

Good luck ~

Answer 6

Well don't be down on yourself- you did the right thing I stayed 18yrs and it did affect my daughters and myself esteem- so I can relate. I don't believe in divorce but when it begins to get ugly get out. First of all thank God you have family, second you are working and you will meet people that will offer you better jobs with more pay. In the meantime though part of getting your self-esteem ,self-worth back is to get your GED in less than a year. You can study with your girls -this will encourage them to continue school and you as well. Don't give up we start off slow you already have a place to stay so that you can get back on your feet, you have a job,and most important your girls. Everything you buy for you will be a stripe of honor and pride of what you accomplished. Just remember things start off slow but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Don't forget to file for child support even if he doesn't have a job now you didn't create the children alone.

Best of luck and remember you are young you can do this it doesn't make us weak only Stronger.

Answer 7

It sounds like you depended on your husband for everything which is common for a lot of women. The sad thing is that when the marriage ends the wife is left wondering how to make it on her own. First of all you have to start believing your self. Love yourself!! You don't need a man to make you happy or to take care of you. They also have classes you can take so that you can get your GED. I know because I was a "drop out" and got my GED later in life. It's time for you to start taking care of yourself. Let your family help you get back on your feet. So what if you work at a grocery store, at least you are working. Sometimes you have to start out at the bottom and work your way up. You can do it, just have faith in yourself!! I had to move in with my mom at 28 years old. I lost custody of my child and my life was a wreck. I felt so low! I thought I would never amount to anything. Finally I started praying a lot. Then I started working in a restuarant making $6.00 an hour. A year later I went to another job making $7.25. After that I got a state job and have been promoted twice! I still don't make a whole lot ($9.45 an hour) but I can take care of myself! I had to keep telling myself that I could do anything I put my mind to! I still believe that to this day! I have so much faith and I know God got me where I am today. I met a wonderful man, got married and have my daughter. Life couldn't be better! Pray and ask God to open doors for you. Pray for him to give you confidence and to believe in your self. Alway know that you can do all things through Jesus Christ!

Answer 8

oh my gosh, you are still very young! I didn't graduate high school, but I went and got my GED and went to college. YOU can do it too. You are on the right track to realize you want a better job and to secure a better future for yourself and your family. It won't be easy to work and go to school, but hopefully your parents will be supportive. Don't think you are dumb. If you already knew it all..well, you wouldn't need to go to school. The reason for going is to learn. It will come back to you. And you can study and even have a tutor if you really need one. Colleges really want you to succeed and they help students a lot. I loved college..so much more than high school. My suggestion is to pick a career that you are interested in, that you can accomplish in a few years, and that will put you in a job which has pay and hours that you like. (nursing is a good example) I am so excited for you!! You can do it! The day is coming when you will not struggle for money and you will have many choices for employment. Way to go!!

Answer 9

Kudos to you for making the very hard decision to leave and better you and your daughters lives. That was a very courageous thing. Just keep thinking that in five years from now you will look back on the decision and feel so proud. Struggles in life only make you stronger, plus life would be way too boring without a challenge. Keep positive happy thoughts and figure out what would make you happy career wise. You can get your GED. go to the adult school and get it. They make you take a refresher course before you take the test. Good luck and best wishes

Answer 10

I've been there and it feels like the walls are closing in on you. As a matter of fact, I am currently debating weather or not to go to college because, I've been out of school for ten years now and I'm scared I'll bomb. As for being single, at home, and with kids, I've been there too. Believe it or not, you can do this. You will struggle but your kids give you strength not to give up. When you put your mind on something, make it a goal and remind yourself that everything you do you do for those kids. Take it as a personal challenge. When I got pregnant at 16, the first thing out of my moms mouth was, your not going to graduate. Well I made it my personal goal to prove everyone wrong. You can do this, just don't lose hope. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 11

I don't understand what you want us to say, if being an example to your 10 and 3 year olds isn't enough to motivate you. Honey, you have a responsibility to those kids to show them how to stand up for themselves (which you did when you refused to tolerate their father's behavior) and make a way for themselves in this world. I'm sure you want them to be independent and hard working. So you need to be. I'm not saying you aren't working hard at your job but you need to move forward now.

The first thing you need to do is get your GED. If you still know how to read, add, subtract, multiply and divide, it won't take you long to prepare to test for it. They have classes so they will help you through the parts you don't remember. After that you need to decide what you want to do. Perhaps a job in a hospital as a nurses aide. They will then pay for you to go through nursing school and nurses can easily support themselves with the shortage in this country.

There are also supports and assistance for single mothers. I would suggest contacting the unemployment office to see if they can hook you up or tell you where to go.

You can do this! You had the courage to leave your alcoholic husband, you can muster the strength to do this. If not for yourself, then for your children's sake. Good luck!