After 6 years he told me it was over, he stays with his co-worker/ room mate whom he claimed was lesbian and @ some point and time was living with her girlfriend. Is it possible if youe'r lesbian to fall in love with a straight man? She is his lover now . Beating my head not knowing if I am coming or going I am still in love with him and do want him back in time any suggestions.
2007-08-28 01:24:40 · 17 answers · asked by maria s 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's hard to determine what this guy really wants; but one thing's for sure--it's NOT fidelity. If you're willing to have a life with a man who will toss you aside when something different or interesting comes along, then stick it out and be prepared to get hurt regularly. If you want a life with a man who will love you and be loyal and build a life with you, then move on. And if that means move to another place to get away from him and the memories, then do it.
2007-08-28 01:31:49 · answer #1 · answered by lfh1213 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain.... there is no sense tho in beating your head against the wall over this! Who knows if she really was a lesbian or just trying it on for a while.
As bad as it feels right now, and I certainly know from experience, believe it or not, it WILL get better! In Time.
Right now, I would suggest going and doing something for yourself. Go to a day spa for a massage or facial. Buy yourself a new outfit; get your hair fixed; get a manicure. Go out with some friends and see a comedy. Stay in with friends and watch a comedy.... Just don't sit around moping!
I will pray for you that your broken heart will heal soon. Just be good to yourself, and DON'T BLAME YOURSELF! Good Luck hon!
2007-08-28 01:32:35 · answer #2 · answered by Linda S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy was doing a job on you. Obviously he was lying for sometime. She may be bisexual and go for whatever. What is important is you. Please go get very busy-clean your house, go out with friends, keep your mind occupied. You do not want him back because you deserve better. There is nothing worse than a liar unless it's a liar and a cheat. At least he finally got around to telling you he was sleeping with his roommate. Here's some sage advice-If you're with a guy for six years and the "relationship" has not moved on in any direction, it isn't going to. He is happy with the way things are and you are settling for less than you deserve. Stop mooning and get busy and don't call or wait for him. Just move on. Even if the other woman gets tired of him and boots him out, do you really want him back so you can wait for him to cheat on you again. Wake up!!!!!!You shouldnt be mooning over him, you should be mad as h*ll. How dare he lie to you! How dare he cheat on you! You deserve better and this guy is never going to make anything better for you!!! Move on. . .
2007-08-28 01:37:21 · answer #3 · answered by towanda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is difficult but you must move on. He did you wrong and you deserve so much better. I know you have many questions as to why he did this, but trust me you are better off not knowing. The more detail you have the worse it will hurt. Stay busy, stay focused on your work, family, etc. Be strong because you will get through this. Go out with your girlfriends. Maybe begin to date again (slowly of course). The main thing is know that you were done wrong and no one (man or woman) deserves to be treated this way. Good luck.
2007-08-28 03:05:50 · answer #4 · answered by Bubbles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey - give it more than seven weeks. It will get better! Been there, done that (on the other side of the gender divide). You will realise there are better people in the world.
In my case it was a year last week and it was about a month ago when I finally realised my life had become three times better without her! It will vary for every relationship and every person but stick in there. It's like giving up smoking, you'll get pangs but just fight it!
Good luck - sounds like ANYONE deserves better than that!
2007-08-28 01:37:31 · answer #5 · answered by Quandary 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh no he didnt pull the "shes a lesbian" card. Girl, I hate to say it but, its over, has been since he moved in with the "lesbian" and now its time for you to gain the strength to move on. Its going to be hard and hurt like hell, but u know what, you are a lot better than that!
2007-08-28 01:29:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know this is harsh, but why want someone that obviously don't want you? I know people get tired of others telling them that it takes time but that is the answer here. Even if he did come back to you, things could never be the same. Move on and find the love that you need from someone who will appreciate you for who you are. Best of luck!
2007-08-28 01:39:22 · answer #7 · answered by Needtoknow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a man who was seduced by and had sex with a "lesbian" once. She explained that even though she identified herself as a lesbian, she still liked to be with a man once in awhile. In any case, I'm one of those few people who believe that the large majority of people are neither purely heterosexual nor purely homosexual. We like to put people into categories, but life is not so neat as that.
2007-08-28 01:31:53 · answer #8 · answered by Happy-2 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I realizee when its hard how you love someone so much and the betray you.But now is the time to MOVE ON!
You tow have broken up and I know know its easier said than done.But,why would you want to hang onto someone who doesnt put your first..doesnt love you wiht their entire heart?
Its waste of time......concnetrate on other things home,read books,do things you havent done in yrs to stay busy and not think about him
2007-08-28 01:34:08 · answer #9 · answered by hugsandhissyfits 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You poor girl. He just told you she was a lesbian so he could spend time with her and it be "justified." Face the facts, honey. He's a jerk who didn't deserve you. I know it's so hard, but be strong and show him that you'll be ok without him. Convince yourself of that too. You can do it.
2007-08-28 01:46:42 · answer #10 · answered by Mel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋