Why is it that everytime I read a relationship question, the responses are usually 90% vs. 10%, in favor of separation? For every issue: cheating, money, stress, kids, jobs, interests, snoring, it doesn't matter what the cause, all people are so quick to suggest divorce or separation as an answer?
Isn't it the trials that make our relationships stronger? Isn't it how we survive them, and work through them together that gives us faith in one another? How can anyone expect to have a relationship that lasts if they jump away from every pain and tribulation and file for divorce?
2007-08-27 22:50:38 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I couldn't agree more. OK, there are a lot of totally messed up relationships out there, where one party clearly exploits the other, and in that case I'm all for separation. But apart from that, the moto today seems to be "there's plenty more fish in the sea". I think people are expecting their partners to respect them (and they should, by all means!) but don't give back the same respect. They are not willing to forgive mistakes and accept their parnters' weaknesses or individuality. Also most of us confuse passion with love. Blinding passion wears off with time and then you are left with just another ordinary person. The most important thing in a relationship is to make each other feel valued, loved, respected and appreciated, and to feel the two of you are a unit who can overcome anything together. That needs a lot more work and effort than walking away.
2007-08-27 23:14:13 · answer #1 · answered by Martha 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Seems there are a lot of younger, less experienced people that answer questions. Youth seems to expect perfection in people, and marriage is what teaches you that perfection doesn't exist. Marriage is a lot of hard work. As long as two people are working at keeping it together, it can last. Less trials are better because serious problems do tear a relationship apart and each time you repair a relationship, it will never be the same as before and sometimes the loss is not worth it. Trials do not give you faith in your partner, they just make you realize how human your partner is and it is your choice to decide if you can accept that in them. It is hard work and a lot of give and take and I am happily divorced. Didn't say I didn't try tho!
2007-08-27 23:24:58 · answer #2 · answered by towanda 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Each & every relationship depends on some conditions without which it is impossible to retain it longer... & commitment is one of such conditions, particularly when a relationship between a man & a woman comes in way. If you dont have dedication to your job, how can you expect better results from that? And then perhaps divorce is the best way to get rid of one's own fault, because reconciliation is not always possible. But dont get the wrong meaning, I am not talking about escapism, rather a peaceful solution. For further queries contact me at niladriranjanray@rediffmail.com
2007-08-27 23:12:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, of course its not. If it were then there would be not much point in getting married would there? But there are some deal breakers - constant cheating, abuse, violence, drug addiction (where they refuse to get help) and desertion. No matter how much you love the other person, you can't make it work if their not into it. You can't run a three legged race when only one person is doing the running.
But then too many people do go into marriage with the thought "if this doesn't work I'll get out". I believe that love is both a feeling AND a decision. You start with the feeling, and then you make a decision to make it work, through good times and bad, through thick and thin, and not to just toss it in when its no longer in the "honeymoon period".
Councelling can help those who are off track, and good communication is essential.
2007-08-27 23:02:43 · answer #4 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
No, like everyone is saying communication and understanding are important keys to relationships. You have to be committed to making a relationship work. It does not matter if it is two months or two years. Pain and happiness are abstracts in the world. Faith and understanding can see you through the hard times.
2007-08-27 23:32:20 · answer #5 · answered by thomastl614 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Relationshiop problems are there in every relationships. It takes maturity to overcome several challenges in relationships.The easy way out is of course separation or divorce. Imature people resort to this.
2007-08-27 22:54:38 · answer #6 · answered by AdultMale 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because no one researches what God has to say on divorce anymore. This world is so busy wanting the easy way out they automatically want to jump to divorce its easier then sticking it out to pay a lawyer 100 bucks then to sit and find a therapist or to just sit and work it out or to just simply pray about it and wait for God to answer it in his time..people want a easy way out and there are so many lawyers out there that wants that quick 100 bucks to give the divorce they help push the issue..i say we just talk to God about every situation and this world would be alot easier.
2007-08-28 01:07:27 · answer #7 · answered by revbill_ussery 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
we live in a disposable world.
if it's broken, throw it away. buy a new one.
i agree with you that relationships take work.
but i think many people get into relationships for the wrong reasons (fear of being alone, etc.), and so are setting themselves up for failed relationships.
introspection is becoming a lost art.
2007-08-27 23:17:39 · answer #8 · answered by wanabbetter 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
hello missy,
how many realation have u been in to.
its 90% difficult to strech for abt 40 to 60 years together everyday so it ends up , its not like there are no good realationship
but the good 1 r not spoken so often as the bad 1s.
2007-08-27 22:55:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋