is it normal for husband to go out with friends every weekend?

Question

My Husband and I have been married for 11 years. He goes out every weekend, for the past 4 or 5 months with his friends on the weekend. Even if he makes plans with me if one of his friends ask him to go someplace he totally forgets about the plans he had with me and goes with them. He never answers his cell phone when he is with them. It doesnt do any good for me to get mad and yell because he says that its ok for him to do this and that its my problem. I dont think its normal for married men to go out every weekend and stay out til midnight. He told me a few weeks ago that he would stop-it lasted a week and he is now back to doing it. I am at my wits end. any advice?

Answer 1

Well at least he tell you,but do you know where he is going.Get with some of you friends have a girls night out ,you deserve it too!

Answer 2

He sounds like my husband, well how he was a couple of months ago. He is married and he needs to sit his *** down somewhere. If he makes plans with you, then he needs to keep those plans. You are his wife therefore you should come first, period. He doesn't forget that he made plans with you, he's just selfish and wants to do what he wants to do. I would be concerned about him not answering his cell phone. What is he doing that prevents him from doing so? No, it's NOT okay for him to do what he's doing and it's NOT just your problem. He is the cause of the problem in that area.

I feel for you because he's doing the same thing my husband did. He'd get upset, throw a tantrum and then say he is going to stop, but one weekend passes and he's rebelling again. The only advice I can give to you is to pray. I prayed and I prayed that somebody would so him the light. He finally decided that it wasn't worth the argument ... but I can tell that deep down inside he's upset about having to have some structure. Other than that, I would say that you can get dressed and go somewhere every weekend and see if that catches his attention.

Answer 3

Youre RIGHT! IT doesnt do any good to yell at him. But something has changed in yur relationship for him to have strated doing this after being together for 11 years! You need to find more ways to entice him into wanting himto be hme with you more often than he is now! And it seems like he is pulling away from you, searching for other ways to be fullfilled or have his fun. Not answering his phone when you call is pretty amazing. Is he afraid your just going to give him the 3rd degree, is he embarrassed in front of his friends or is he doing something he shouldnt be? You cant really say your going to allow him one night a week with his buddies cause a relationship shouldnt be TELLING your partner what they can do! Each of you should care about each other enough to be considerate of time spent away from each and together. If you are feeling a little hurt, and want to get back at him in a non hurtful way but to make a statement, try going out leaving him at home. You can just go to the library or a friends house it doesnt have to be with the girls at a bar or something like that! But he doesnt have to know where and why just that you arent there when he is! The other thing you can do is to get some of your own interests to do on the nights he isnt home! Go have your own time in your own way! He may get tired of his new life and things will go back to normal. He could find out he likes his freedom and stay gone more and more so I think I would start greeting at the front door in nothing but an apron and get his attention and keep it!

Answer 4

I'm sorry that you are stressed about this. Try and talk to him, and be calm and collected. Tell him that your marriage is a priority. You deserve better. How would he feel if you treated him like that? You need answers. Life is too short to be miserable. My husband goes fishing each year with his buddies for a weekend. It doesn't bother me because I know that it makes him happy. I get some time for me. I get caught up on my reading I don't have to do anything but relax. We all need alone time once in awhile. But, it sounds like he's not making you feel loved and needed. Ask him what is going on. Good luck and take care of yourself.

Answer 5

He never answers his cell phone when he is with them

Girl that is the part that bothers me. If he was with his buddies what would he have to hide. You need to have one of your girlfriends come over and you two need to follow him after he leaves. If he is with his buddies then you can deal with that problem which by the way is not normal for a married man. However, this is totally out of character for him. All of a sudden after 11 years he decides he wants to go out with the guys. I am not trying to scare you but we are usually the last to know. I just want you to be smart about this. Something smells fishy...so if I were you I would go fishing.

Answer 6

My husband goes out every weekend with his friends to participate in his hobby and he doesnt answer his cell phone either (because if youve ever been around these cars you know you cant hear a phone ring). However he is NOT going to a bar he is not out with other women he is with a group of guys that all do the same hobby he does {nitro powered rc's}. Its every weekend and when the races are 100 miles from home he stays over night instead of driving back here to leave so early the following morning. He also works on his cars at least 2-3 nights a week and they have "club meetings" one night a week. It doesnt bother me that he does this it bothers me we spend 20grand a yr on this "hobby" and the time he spends w his cars is time he use to spend with us.

now if he was going to a bar every weekend I'd be suspicious! By the way I just LOVE how women say they "allow" their husband/bf to do something..lmfao as IF you own them!

Answer 7

Tell him ok you get one night during the weekend and I get the other and he has to watch the kids. Get some girlfriends together look real good and dress sexy and go out every weekend if he won't watch the kids seperate them two and two to friends and family once and a while. Once you start going out and having fun yourself either A. he will notice and realize he needs to be a husband or B you will realize life is so much better without him.

Answer 8

Find yourself from friends and head out til midnight too. Don't answer the phone and don't tell him where you are. He will get the message. If going out isn't your thing, then find some chat buddys online and chat all night and ignore him. Good luck!

Answer 9

Give him a stern talking to. What a selfish husband.

I'd do the same for a while and let him see what a bonehead he's being.

I think you need to get interested in the same things he's doing too or find something for the both of you to do together.

THis definitely needs fixing so work on it girl !

Answer 10

Before I married my husband I allowed him to go out 1 night a week with friends. He never took advantage of it. He has never gone out without me by his side. Why would your husband want to go out and have fun without the love of his life?? It don't make sense. You really need to evaluate your relationship. Especially if he doesn't answer any of your phonecalls while he's out. That sounds kind of suspicious to me. You need to give him his 1 night out a week and tell him he is not allowed to break your plans just for his measley friends. Put your foot down and stand your ground. BE A WOMAN!!!

Answer 11

Ummm... IDK, but you have got to figure out a way to stop it. And also, find out what the REAL reason is he's going out every weekend.
My honest opinion, sounds to me like there is s/thing more than just going out with the boys going on. Find out now, before it goes on too far.
And no, it's not normal for any husband to go out every weekend, to not answer his cell, or to tell you it's your problem. And for you to start going out isn't going to fix the real problem. Find out what that real problem is ASAP!