2007-08-27 10:47:40 · 28 answers · asked by south of france 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He was a friend and still live a block away. He was discharge from the Army with a personalty problem. I was talking with the local recuriters and seem to think I may be able to get him recalled to active duty and punished under the UCMJ and he will get a bad discharge. I told his wife and my oldest son knows what happened.
2007-08-31 02:54:18 · update #1
Sweety, stop and think, it takes 2 to mess around.
Why punish him when she should have been behaving herself?
2007-08-27 10:53:10 · answer #1 · answered by Tapestry6 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what your problems are between you and your wife and I understand how hurt and devastated you must feel. I am assuming that your wife cheated on you and that your very angry with the man that your wife betrayed you with. Enough damage has been done and he would not be worth going to jail over! Cheating is always a choice and your wife was the only one responsible for protecting your feelings and emotions here because she is the one that is suppose to love you .....this man has no attached feelings for you other than believing your wife and trusting her that she was miserable in her relationship with you. Your wife allowed this man to enter into her life and she is the only one to blame here. Does your wife feel any remorse for decieving you? Because if she does and is truly sorry do you feel that in time you could forgive her? If the chance is there I would focus on that and get an appointment with a marriage counselor as soon as possible. Don't even try to figure this out with your wife by yourself because you are going to need proffessional intervention to know where to go with your hurt,pain and anger and make some serious changes in both of your lives. I would stay away from this man and not allow myself any contact with him because he just isn't worth it! Please get help and do not make a choice about anything untill you see a therapist. Take care and keep yourself strong.
2007-08-27 14:04:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear about this---It must be very sad and hurtful for you to be in this situation.
I agree with most of the other answers....This guy is really not so important. It could have been him or any other person...The ugly part is that your wife is the one who participated in this- and she is the one who made a committment to you! THAT is what needs to be addressed ASAP by the both of you.
Perhaps you could try separating for a while so you can sort out your feelings, or you could also try going to therapy...Just don't bottle up your anger because you could self-destruct in the future.
Whatever you decide to do, I wish you well and hope you can overcome this as unscarred as possible.
2007-08-27 11:05:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm...
It seems like everyone here is suggesting that you get even with your wife....
Are you still together? Have you forgiven her?
If so...then do nothing. If you've forgiven...then forgive and move on. Don't dwell on the negative. Put him out of your life....don't throw the affair back up in your wife's face the next time you have an argument....and simply move on.
Sometimes the best revenge is showing that you're the better person...by your actions!
Good luck!
2007-08-27 11:02:59 · answer #4 · answered by MACHNGUN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was your wife cooperative with him and was never complaining to you abot the mess this guy created.
Did you get information suddenly from wife or you discovered on your own..
If wife too is guilty of the mess. then Leave the wife and enjoy your freedom
if the wife is innocent.. Leave the matter here so that your wounds heal. Remembering constinously will keep your hurt alive..
Choice is Yours. to Life happy Life or Hurtful Life
2007-08-27 20:32:41 · answer #5 · answered by krishprud@yahoo.co.in_KISHORLAL 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope you don't take this the wrong way but you need to focus on your wife. That might have had something to do with the reason she messed around. But in answer to your questions, if he's in the military they can be court martialed. If your wife is still with you then that is your revenge, redirect your attention towards her and the issues in your marriage and the success of your marriage will be the best revenge!
2007-08-27 10:54:58 · answer #6 · answered by Georgia Peach 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be a damn fool. Unless he is a relative or friend, that is so stupid. There are a million guys that, given the opportunity, would mess around with your wife. If they haven't messed around with your wife, they have messed around with some others man's wife. Are you planning to get even with all of them too.
Unlike your wife, they haven't made any promises to you. If you wife puts it on them, they are going to take it.
2007-08-27 11:14:06 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why bother? Why put yourself in a situation just because of a man who messed around with your wife. She is to blame, she knew she was married, she was the one that should have said no. Your angry with the wrong person.
2007-08-27 10:54:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the fight should be with the one that had the committment to you, not the guy. Cuz there's a hundred more guys out there willing, but if your wife doesn't "just say no", then the problem will happen again and again.
2007-08-27 10:54:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't. It's your wife's fault. She knew what she was doing, and she needs to take the blame for that. Why is it that most men feel they have to get the guy that's involved? She allowed this to happen.
2007-08-27 11:06:19 · answer #10 · answered by Ericka 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sit back and watch this sh.. unfold in front of your eyes. Them 2 won't be happy for long he knew she was married and she knew she was married. A match made in heaven these 2 scum bags deserve each other. My ex left me 7 weeks ago after 6 years to love his supp to be lesbian room mate. I know you pissed, however, better off.
It makes me sick all these sorry azz people walking out.
Don't worry about messing him up he will get his share hell, he got her.
2007-08-27 11:01:30 · answer #11 · answered by maria s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋