Ok, so here's why I'm sooo frustated: Right now, we've been living in a house owned by my in-laws, and since it's theirs, well they have a key and walk in and out whenever they feel like it, withous even knocking! This is driving me crazy almost literally speaking, lol. Ok, so when we were in th procss of buying OUR new house, I was so excited!! Finally some privacy! No inlaws invading me! lol
Now, they're seariously thingking in moving right next to us!! OMG!!!!!!!!!
Please, som advice, I haven't said a thing to anyone because I believe anyone has a right to buy whatever they want and live wherever thy want, but if this happens, oh God.
Please give me some advice! :-)
2007-08-27 10:39:09 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I do feel for you, however, If your husband won't teach them respect and privacy, then you need to. You can do this in a very polite way. If they want to move next door, (sorry to hear about that) then let them, however, they need to know boundaries. If they love their son and you, they will learn to accept it.
Just talk to them.
2007-08-27 10:50:12 · answer #1 · answered by stormey_84074 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say...if this is a new construction- speak with the saleslady. maybe she can help direct them to a house/lot nearby and not right next door.
If not new sales/construction...are they using the same realtor as you??? maybe you can gain an ally there and let that person help direct them elsewhere.
How does your spouse feel?? If the above suggestions won't work- can or will he speak to them? Let them know that you love them and want to be close to family, but that you also want a little privacy- a chance to spread your wings and grow and bond as a couple. Be sure to mention how you are grateful or thankful that you had the opportunity to spend time being close to them...that might help too.
If nothing else- be sure the neighborhood will let you put up a six foot privacy fence, keep your doors locked, and establish visiting rules.
good luck
2007-08-27 17:49:02 · answer #2 · answered by Christine H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Sweety, I feel for you.
Is there anyway you can sit them down and explain to them that it really bothered you when, even though it was their home, how they would just walk in whenever they wanted to. And explain, that even though you love them and your family, but you really are looking forward to PRIVACY!!
Make sure your hubby knows ahead of time that THEY WILL NOT be permitted a KEY to your new home!
Some times, we humans have to get a back bone and speak our minds, or it drives us crazy, makes us mean, unhappy and hateful.
Get a back bone and speak up! Has your new home went through? Can you MOVE?? Why not find a home that doesn't have another home for sale within MILES!!!
2007-08-27 17:54:02 · answer #3 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is really crfazy you and your husband bought a house and moved out of your in laws house right, now they are plannning on buying a house next door to you.
listen just treat them as neighbors just say hi and bye and dont let them invade your privacy what does your husband think about it.
best of luck
2007-08-27 18:06:07 · answer #4 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, the first poster is right, but see if you can set down some rules. Make it reciprocal, even if it doesn't need to be. "I promise never to come over without calling if you promise never to come over without calling first." Make friends in the neighborhood, too, so you won't fall back on your in-laws as your only social group. Give a key to a friend so when your mil says "I'll take a key in case you ever get locked out" you can tell you you have it handled, but thanks.
2007-08-27 17:48:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Miss Jackie, First of all you should not be leaving your doors unlocked ! Second you are adults, put down house rules ! Family for neighbors can be a very good thing as long as you respect each others space ! Just be honest !
2007-08-27 17:58:02 · answer #6 · answered by lonewolf 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let them move in if that is what they choose to do. Make sure however that they do NOT have a key to YOUR home. They have no right just walking into your home now. If they continue to do it, then it would be time to sit them down and explain that it is rude to come to someones home uninvited and unannounced. They know better, shame on them!!!
2007-08-27 17:47:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't give them a key. If they are smothering you by visiting all the time, tell your husband to have them call before coming over to see if it's a good time. Let him handle his family so you don't look like the bad guy.
2007-08-27 18:06:07 · answer #8 · answered by philosophy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't give out the key to your new house and don't accept the key to your in-law's new house if offered to you. Hopefully your husband will co-operate in this respect
2007-08-27 17:46:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband and explain to him that your concerns. try to be objective, and let him know that you wants privacy. If your in laws love his son so much, you don't have a problem with him visiting as much as he wants. But you want to have your own place and your own life with your husband. I hope this works.
2007-08-27 17:49:29 · answer #10 · answered by NA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋