What the heck is wrong with me? Is this normal?

Question

Yesterday, my husband brought home the rest of our belongings that had been stored in his Mothers storage unit (we have moved recently). I came home from work at 10:30 PM to find the house pretty clean, but all this crap everywhere. His Mother, who works for Avon, apparently gave us a bunch of stuff. Now, because his Mother gave it to him, he counts it as disrespectful to get rid of it, so we have to keep it. We have a small home, which now has three desks (because his Mother gave them to us). Two are in our bedroom. Our closet is packed with his stuff. Electronics, an extra computer, music equipement, wires, golf clubs, etc.

I got so fuming this morning that I moved myself out of the bedroom. Our baby doesn't need closet space and I do, so I moved my things into it. Is it normal that I want out of that bedroom? He'll think my reason is ridiculous, but he won't move the stuff. Do you think I'm crazy?

Answer 1

I used to have a whole bedroom that was a spare that I used for my closet. We need space to keep our stuff. Let him have that closet for his stuff and you can use the other room for yours. It makes since....what's the big deal. Why don't you tell his mother how her giving you guys all of this stuff is causing problems.....nothing wrong with open communication, that is what makes people a part of a family.

Answer 2

I think that you need to stand up for yourself now or this will continue to happen. Maybe let your mother in law know that while you appreciate all the stuff that she gives you, that you just don't have room for it. Find someway to compromise with your husband. Maybe only keep a few things or something. You two just need to work through it together. Come up with a plan that makes both of you happy. I wouldn't move out of the bedroom though. That sounds a little extreme.

Answer 3

Calm down. You sound a bit frazzled and information like where his mom works - is totally irrelevant. His mom was cleaning out things and she gave you stuff she thought you might need or want. Wait a few weeks, then slowly, bit by bit, start giving things away. Smile. Tell her you appreciate that she thought of you first. Tell your husband that his mom is so thoughtful and generous and you just know for sure that she'd want you to be generous as well. Tell him to pick out things he really NEEDS and that the two of you can pick out a charity for the rest or a needy family that needs things. Put your clothes back in your bedroom and out HIS clothes in baby's closet. If he feels inconvenienced by this, he'll soon clean out the house all on his own. Come on! show some maturity. This is a stupid thing to fight about.

Answer 4

No - you just want a little space ask him nicely to look into feng shui with you and tell him that there is limited space that is causing negitive energy - go to the liberary and get the educational tapes on the subject this will solve your problem and many more. You may also have to take matters into your own hands, if he isn't willing to participate in watching the tape, buy a shed move things out there or into the grage, re-arrange furniture so that you are comfortable if he doesn't go along with you on watching the tape do what you must without throwing things out but RENT THE TAPE!!!! It will change everything!

Answer 5

No, I think he's crazy and he's getting it from his mother. Your house isn't the local dump. If mom wants to get rid of something you should have a say on bringing it into your home or not. He sounds like a pack rat, maybe his mom is too. Start piling all of the stuff in "his" personal spaces. Maybe he'll get the hint...

Put your foot down. If he wants you back in the bedroom he'll get the picture...

Answer 6

Yeah i think of that your dislike for each thing is to instruct people who you're extra helpful than them, offering you with a feeling of capability over those human beings. to illustrate, your friends who're being rebelious. You suggested you tried beer too yet you have been disenchanted at your pal for doing it? Its as while you try too plenty to be a guy or woman, you want to be observed on your ameliorations to extremely everyone to be certain which you to stand out. because of the fact there is plenty versatility there is not something you are able to like without being the comparable as each and every physique else. Im not asserting individuality is undesirable, yet you're able to desire to start accepting that folk will do what they want if its not affecting your protection then recover from it. i think of you do want counselling - this feels like somebody who could start up a cult or something - sorry.

Answer 7

No, you're not ridiculous. You like space. So do I. I don't believe in having extra material items. I think people hold too much value in how much they own. There are people out there who might NEED the stuff that your M-I-L gave you, but your hubby feels you should hold on to. She might have thought that you two needed it and that's why she gave it to you. It's sweet he cares about his mama's feelings, but maybe he should consider Goodwill or any friends who might need that stuff.

Answer 8

ive just read your answer to someone elses post and it seems like his mothers stuff was just an excuse for you to move out of the bedroom.
you need to speak to your husband about your lack of intimacy in the bedroom as it is making big problems in your relationship.

Answer 9

you married a packrat. you should sit down and discuss with him that although you appreciate the fact that his family (try not to single out his mom or he might get a little offended) wants to help out and give you things, you just don't have the room. and besides, wouldn't someone a little less fortunate than yourselves benefit from a fine piece of furniture that they could get at Goodwill? are ya pickin' what I'm throwin' down girl?? hope so. good luck to ya.

Answer 10

Well, tell him you can keep anything that your mother gave you because you feel "obligated" to keep it...all you have to do is get rid of this other stuff to make room for it.