My wife says she is too anxious to move next week. The only problem is we signed a lease and gave a deposit and the house we are in now already has a new renter ready to move in. Plus, our kids still have to register for school. She says she changed her mind. Myself and the kids want move and she says she cant. She loved it and looked forward to it up until about a week ago when she suddenly changed her mind. she says the move is giving her severe anxiety and she just cant do it. If we dont go, we have nowhere to live and the kids have no school. Plus we lose our deposit. any help is appreciated. Thank You
2007-08-26 17:58:40 · 9 answers · asked by Terence M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The new place is a nicer house that is bigger and less expensive. Plus the area is nicer. None of this makes any sense.
2007-08-27 02:07:23 · update #1
There are many reasons for move anxiety but it is a common reaction to such a big change. I was an Air Force brat, so frequent moves were mandatory. It took many years into adulthood (and several moves) before I overcame my move anxiety. The best thing you can do is to let her know that you will be there to support her and help her. Take it one step at a time. Help her make a list each day for the countdown. Sometimes writing it down makes it not so huge, and it feels more manageable taking it in bites. Since she is so anxious, taking on more of the responsibility may be the only option you have. Reassure her that she can do this. But most of all, don't get angry with her. She doesn't want to be anxious anymore than you do. She is just "wishing" out loud that she could avoid it.
2007-08-26 18:07:42 · answer #1 · answered by Jennifer C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife needs to grow up and realize the lease is a legal document and you could get sued for all the expenses you would be costing both the Landlord, and the new people who have also paid deposits, etc. Sounds like she is scared of the new scene.....you need to persuade her that you can move again later, if the new place doesn't work out...it doesn't have to be forever.
There are times when you need to stand your ground...that this isn't a time when she can...and maybe just start moving things out. She will probably get the message, even though she doesn't like it. If you have to...you get the kids signed up, etc. Just tell her...the truck is coming....(when it is) and start loading it. It is calling her bluff, and probably will work.
In this instance, she had time to say she didn't want to move.....and she is in the wrong.
2007-08-27 01:07:55 · answer #2 · answered by samantha 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I can relate to your wife. Although, I won't lose money over decisions I have to back out on. Chances are, she won't either.
I am a chronic volunteer. I feel great when I agree to help a friend or 'change' something. But when it comes down to it, I get severe anxiety, and grasp on to ridiculous reasons as to why I shouldn't do something. I moved around a lot growing up, and when it comes down to it, I am not as open to change as I'd like to be.
She'll kick in to high gear and pull through for your family. Just be reassuring when she needs it. Coax her. And if she asks, the couch looks GREAT there...
2007-08-27 01:09:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
woah. so basically she does not have a choice.
Sounds to me like she is just having cold feet.. second thoughts about it. It's normal, and just anxiety. Maybe you could get together with a family counselor and maybe if she has such severe anxiety she could talk to a psychiatrist. For now, just reassure her that your family is still together, and it will just be an exciting new chapter in your lives. Don't get mad or anxious yourself about the financial details. Tell her that she can do it, she definitely can make the move.
Just help her calm down, take deep breaths, and prepare for what is going to happen. I sometimes have anxiety attacks and it always helps me to just breathe deeply, sometimes even to lie on my back and rub my stomach clockwise.
2007-08-27 01:06:09 · answer #4 · answered by arsenic sauce 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wonder why she doesn't want to move into the new place. Is she uncomfortable?
This is not the time for her to back out since the new tenants are already moving in.
Have you talked to her about this and asked what the real reason is?
2007-08-27 01:18:48 · answer #5 · answered by Hani 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u gave notice to move.. i am sure u will have to move if the land lord wants u out..
go tell them.. and tell them you will pay for any losses they have
and u will loose ur money on the new lease..tooo
then once settle.. u need to send ur wife to the Dr to find out why? sound like she didn't think u would go thru with the move and was leaving it to u to back out.. and when u didn't... wowo
are u sure there isn't more to her not wanting to move??? i think there is more to it....
ck this out.. ????
2007-08-27 01:14:16 · answer #6 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW... there has got to be some deeper reason for her not wanting to leave. She is acting very selfish and putting her whole family at risk, so I would imagine there is a very 'important' reason.
2007-08-27 01:02:59 · answer #7 · answered by Nikki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, pack up and go anyways with the kids, she is just freaking out...she knows she can't stay.
2007-08-27 01:14:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take her to the doc and get meds for her and get her gone that is how one does it she'll cope
2007-08-30 22:47:45 · answer #9 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋