This has nothing to do with gays getting married.In fact,i hope that they do,if they want.I mean,is marriage sacred anymore?People can get married and then divorced in a matter of months.I am 26,and my my boyfriend wants to get married.I love him,but the ritual of looking for a dress and cake and everything else does not thrill me.I would rather that we did not go through all of that without him thinking that i do not love him.
2007-08-25 19:22:58 · 14 answers · asked by irene i 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You don't have to have a big wedding if you don't want to do that. Marriage is only dead if the two people entering it don't know what they really need to make a relationship work. There are very happy never married couples (ie Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell or Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins) but a lot of people see marriage as the next logical step to a lengthy relationship. If you aren't one of them just explain that to him and talk about what might work for both of you.
2007-08-25 19:32:57 · answer #1 · answered by indydst8 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the thing is, I say its not dead exactly. Because the actual act of it is still very much alive as you said. People are getting married very soon and early on in life and still divorce. I just say the real meaning behind what marriage is about is dead. People aren't taking the time out to get to know each other well enough anymore to even have a successful relationship. And when they do, some just have you have said don't even want to get married. They love the idea of shacking up and saying its not the 50's anymore where you have to get married. Nobody had to get married in the 50's either, but feelings were real enough back in those times where people genuwinely got married because they actually cared for the people they were seeing. They were proud to say this person is my husband or wife. Now with so many people shacking up and all it may work well for them, but there is still the complications of well what are you to me, what am I to you? How do I explain this relationship to my family and friends? See when there are real genuwine feelings and both parties are responsible enough and go ahead and get the marriage there is no confusion. And really I'm not trying to judge anyone that just wants to live with that special person and all, but I think its too free. I mean in my mind if someone loves me that much they would want to prove it to the world. By marrying me and not hiding me away as a secret lover or something. So back to your question, the institution of marriage isn't dead, people's maturity levels have not reached that peak like it once did before in earlier years. So the real nature and true desire for a real marriage is gone and in esscence dead.
2007-08-25 19:37:03 · answer #2 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
marriage is still sacred.
it is made so by the two persons who join in marriage.
marriage is not dead. it is the symbolic joining of the body mind, spirit and souls of two persons who do so willingly with honest and wholesome intentions.
you don't have to go out and buy a big expensive dress. you can go to las vegas get married go home and have a get together for friends and family. its a lot less expensive, but just as valid and important as a big expensive ceremony.
unfortunately, you may have a particular view of life that you should consider before you get married. maybe marriage is not for you. can you hang in with your husband for the long haul?
will you respect each other for a life time.
if you don't think you can do it, maybe marriage is not for you.
it will be important to your kids. there is a significance when children know that their parents got married. their lives will be more meaningful knowing that mom and dad, planned a life for them and they didn't just wind up here as accidents or unwanted.
consider all there is to consider and then make a highly considered decision.
generally, married persons who are of one mind wind up being better off that being not together. this takes planning and a conscious to improve and work together.
my mother always said two can live better than one. and if you plan, yes you will do better in every respect. two salaries and just one rent to pay.
best wishes. hope you make the best decision.
if you do get married, hope you both have a very happy, rewarding and enriched life.
2007-08-26 01:38:35 · answer #3 · answered by ramni222 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well to begin off, I will say that you're highly flawed at the historical past of marriage and have to do extra study earlier than making yet another announcement on its normal reason. Marriage is not the concern - it is the men and women that do not view it for what it's. And how are you able to say go away emotion out of marriage? The bases of marriage is love and the desire to spend ceaselessly with any individual. Do you desire us all going for walks round like zombies with out a emotion, getting in combination to bigger ourselves financially? And while you get to the top your lifestyles, and you've gotten acquired one million bucks and the whole lot you might ever desire - is all of it going to be valued at it figuring out that you've got alll these items however no love? Sounds such as you have to reside slightly and expand your horizons.
2016-09-05 14:31:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had the same situation. I opted to go to the Justice of the Peace. I am still married (9 years later) and happy I did not spend a the money. I know people can get divorced and the certificate will not stop that. Just take precautions.... premarital counseling, talk about your future finances, kids, work.
2007-08-25 19:48:18 · answer #5 · answered by stepjhudd 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't get the end of your question but I hope that marriage IS a dead institution because we as a society have a penchant for bringing old things back with a vengance! Maybe marriage will become a cool retro "thing to do" because it certainly has had it's day at this point.
2007-08-25 19:33:51 · answer #6 · answered by mosaic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel nowadayz that marriage iz only sacred if the two of You truly know deep down, that is true unconditional eternal love 4ever, To be with a person knowing that there would never be any animosity between the two of you and your personal relationship,too many people marry for all the wrong reazons, I believe it should be a once in a lifetime committment az two who share it eternaly. There should never be any doubtz.
2007-08-25 19:35:06 · answer #7 · answered by electric_blue_eyed_man 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not an institution. It's a way of life. Would you say "family" is an institution? No, it's a way of living life. If you look at marriage as FAMILY, then you get the idea of what marriage means.
You can't divorce your blood, no matter how bad they are to you.
2007-08-25 19:42:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not at all. Marriage brings the bonding between a male and female in all respects of life and upto the end of the life. Don't hesitate to be married in right situation and right conditions.
2007-08-25 19:52:02 · answer #9 · answered by srinivasan v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well marriage now a days seems to mean nothing much more than a contract to be with each other, until things start going bad that is, the whole 'til death do us part has no significant meaning since people everywhere are getting divorced and the whole "in good times and in bad" yeah well it seems like the bad times overpower the good times so idk i dont really see the point in getting married, unless if maybe he just wants to tie the knot with you so that you can consider being with each other forever, but forever is an awfully long time so idk how things might go for you...but you know, maybe he wants to show you that he is ending his search for the One and picking you so juts go for it and if you dont want the whoel ceremony talk to him about having a small ceremony with only close friends and family that way you wont have to be feeding all these freeloaders who only come to eat...well idk i wish you luck
2007-08-25 19:43:41 · answer #10 · answered by Buttercup 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋